Fab Feb 2009: things that go bump and "mummy, mummy, MUMMY!!!" in the middle of the night

[dinkystinky]

New halloween inspired thread (in honour of this time of year) to talk about our little jekyll & hydes [hgrin]

Is anyone going to be taking their little ones trick or treating this year? We'll be at MIL's for Halloween and she's already told me she has both Danny and DS1 costumes -so it appears that decision has been made for us

mos your poor dd, hope she's coping ok.

I've had another really shit day at work. It all blew up again today (won't bore you all with details coz it's boring me), I don't think the latest thing was directed at me, but I was in the room when certain comments were being flung around so I said "why don't you just tell us what it is you're talking about, what we have supposedly done or said so we can get it sorted instead of coming in here shouting your mouth off" (will have to go into a bit of detail)
she basically said if you all (directed at me and 2 other staff) have something to say about someone say it to our faces. I said I didn't have a clue what she was talking about and if she could tell us a bit more, we could sort it. She stormed out of the room, so after a few minutes I went to the garden (where he was with her class) and asked to have a quiet word, she said "No, I'm busy" so I thought well, after making an effort to deal with it appropriately and failing, I went to the dep head (again) and told her everything that's been going on for the past 2 weeks.
The head of dept was pulled in from a parents meeting, I spoke to her and told her something had to be done as we shouldn't have to work like that.
She called a mass meeting, and then we had a chat just the 2 of us and she said it'd be sorted and that I wasn't the only one on a temp contract.
We will see what tomorrow brings, but this is seriously getting very silly now.
Think the mass meeting will make it all worse, but the HOD has said if anything else gets said to me, or I see any other issue, just to report to her about it, not to try to resolve it myself, just to pass it to her.
I don't want to be the one constantly running to management, but if no one will talk to me, then not sure what else to do. I can ignore most of it, but shouting at staff infront of kids is out of order. Plus she'd waited until our teacher was out of the room, so clearly knew she was acting unprofessionally.
Any advice? (if you managed to read that without dying of boredom)

MOS - sorry to hear about DD's arm - ouch!

SM - what a saga. I think if HoD has asked you to report any issues directly to her in future then that is what you should do. As you say you are not getting anywhere trying to sort things out face to face, so it is her job to make sure all her staff are working properly together.....must be really stressful for you, sounds a lot like playground bullying.

I have been away with work for a couple of nights and returned to find both children absolutely filthy....don't think either of them has been near soap and water. DH said it was really stressful coping with both of them on his own (really?!) and had to give them treats to get them to behave . Biscuit jar is empty and fridge is still full so am wondering what exactly they had for their lunches and dinners......

SM - god that's a nightmare! I agree with Calico - just do as HoD said and just do your job. It will all blow over but not much fun for you while all this crap is going on.

Calico - your post made me smile. Our house is often a shambles when I leave the kids with DH for the day too - but a couple of days of living on biscuits probably wont have harmed them too much

It seems now the witches are pulling in people from other departments too.
My contract expires 31st august and think I'm going to tell them I don't want it renewed. I'm still on books with the agency so they might be able to get me somewhere else.
This just isn't worth it, I'd rather be at home with my boys. Only reason I'm not handing in notice now is coz I want the 6 weeks holiday pay........... I have to give 4 weeks notice though.
I want to hand my notice in now and get out of here now, but really want that holiday pay

SM - can you last out till August? If they are bullying you and making you miserable, and you really dont want to be there, then while the 6 weeks hoilday pay would be lovely and handy to have, is it really worth the hassle and misery? I'm so sorry its escalated to such an extent - the school is clearly really badly run and from what I recall you said you thought there were more changes in the offing also...

Dinky, yes I think the school is quite badly run.
Maybe you're right and I should hand in notice now. Dp says I should stick it out and at least give my hod a chance to sort it out. I think one of the witches has her contract ending in 2 weeks time, but I overheard her and someine else saying they still hadn't heard.
I'm thinking if I hand 4 week notice in tomorrow then I'll only have to do another 2 weeks as 2 weeks will be this half term............

Perhaps speak with the HoD and say things are getting so bad you're seriously considering handing in your notice? As you say, easter holidays are coming up so hopefully you'll get a break and things will get sorted by the time school reconvenes

I've just typed up my resignation letter for the head teacher. I will be handing it to her tomorrow morning.
I have e-mailed my HoD informing her of my decision.
Am disappointed that it's come to this, but tbh, having a full time job with so much travelling won't work for long once dp has relocated, so the shit going on now is not the only thing that has led me to this decision.

Anyway, enough about me (just for now )
calico That i so funny!! Think it'd be similar here if I was to go away. Although I am guilty of biscuit bribing I have been known to say to the boys at 5:30am "if you get up now, you can have a biscuit"

morning all

SM hope you are not doing anything too hasty in resigning although I can totally understand why you feel you need to. I think you must have the patience of a saint putting up with all that crap. Perhaps the HOD will take it very seriously now and not accept your resignation and sort out properly. Where is your DP relocating too?

calico your story made me chuckle too. DH used to say we could go back to the UK, I could return to practicing law and he'd be a house husband. Funnily enough, that suggestion appears to have been forgotten since he had them for a week when I was in the UK in February!

DD still very sorry for herself and back to hospital tomorrrow evening to see ortho specialist.

Had a nice night out last night at the school ball at British Embassy. Pink champagne, REALL wine and Baileys. Heaven Finally got to bed at about 2am and little shit/H woke up full of the joys of spring at 6am.

Found out Wed pm that we think the 'complaint' has been investigated and is being sent to someone more senior for action tomorrow morning. Am going to finalise my (rather fabulous even if I say so myself) supplementary statement and get that submitted to him first thing tomorrow as I am 99% sure that the 'report' from the other person investigating will be very one sided (given that he reports to the witches husband) Oh well, watch this space.

Good luck with it MOS. Glad you had a nice evening.

My resignation will be handed to the head teacher, so it's not for the hod to make the call. I haven't outlined any detail as to why I'm leaving in the letter, I just stated that I wished to submit my 4 weeks notice and thanked her for giving me the opportunity to work at her school blah blah. I emailed the hod to inform her of what I shall be doing, but tbh there are other reasons for this and my decision will not be up for discussion. I added to the hod that I wish this to remain confidential, she can inform any leadership people who she feelds needs to know, but it is to be kept private from the general staff.

SM - really sorry its come to you having to resign. Hope you'll be able to get a more convenient job, at a better run school, more easily now that you have some experience on your CV.

MoS - glad you had a good evening. Best of luck with the investigation!

Hey. I handed my notice in. 4 weeks. They told me there was no need to return after holidays, they will pay the 4 weeks but don't want to start the new term with the struggle of switching staff 2 weeks in.

We're back from the hospital with an extremely brave boy with a snipped tongue

He was an angel, extremely brave and hardly complained at all apart from when he was coming round from the anaesthetic. He's full of bean again now but understandably a bit tempermental. The staff on the day ward and surgery ward were so lovely and we were in and out in 4 hours althogether.

mos.... sorry your dd is still suffering, hope the ortho specialist is some help.

SM.... it's a shame things didn't work out in your job, hope you find something else soon

fab news summerrain

silvermoon- hope you find something which suits you and your family better and that the staff are nice

calico

hurray we are on Easter holidays - this time next week we will be away in the caravan

summerRain so glad it went well and he is ok

SM I'm sure you'll find something much better, you've not been happy there for ages and I recall its quite a long journey for you?

DD was really suffering today with her arm. Her wrist and fingers were very puffy and a friend's mum who is out for a visit and used to be a nurse suggested we should get it looked at. Its our Sunday today so med centre shut and don't like to bother them but we decided to phone the on call nurse in the end. He was really good and med DH and DD at med centre and confirmed the bandage was much too tight and re-did it. She is a little happier now although a bit sad she is not allowed to go to school tomorrow. I wanted to send her back but they won't let her back without a drs note to say it is ok. Seeing ortho tomorrow night (7pm appt which was a bit odd) so then hopefully we can get appt first thing sunday with med centre dr and she can go back to school Sunday (she is driving me mad and I need to get on with so many things!) Desperately trying to finish some work on my counselling course with a view to last assignment being done as soon as I'm back here after easter and getting it all finished. Doing LOTS of packing as planning on taking as much stuff 'home' as possible next week. Think we have baggage allowance of around 150k and want to take the full amount.

Will be manic next week as we are moving all the bedrooms around. Poor H hasn't had a bedroom and has just had his cot in guest room/nannies room so need to sort him out a room. Can't let him have that room as it has a sink and shower in there so will put DD1 in there then DD2 in DD1's room then H in DD2's room. We will have to paint 3 rooms and get flooring done in one and lots of moving around but am really looking forward to getting it all done and making it a proper home. Feel like I've been living in limbo for years now, not really sure where home is so need to sort that out

Hope everyone has a good weekend x

Am so glad it went smoothly Summerrain - was thinking of you and A today.

Sorry DD is suffering so much with her arm MoS - good luck with all the packing and rejigging of rooms.

SR so glad all went well. Brave mummy too!

SM good for you - no point staying somewhere that is making you stressed. Hope you'll find something else suitable soon.

SR So pleased it all went well with A at the hospital.
MOS Yes it was a long journey. Over 2 hours each way travelling time.
Sounds like there is plenty of work to be done. Exhausting just reading it!! Good luck.

I received the nicest e-mail from the head teacher, was a nice little lift, really made me smile, here is a copy and paste of it,

"Dear Nicola,

I was sorry to receive your resignation , but do understand that it is due to a number of different factors, and I am sure it is the best decision for you.

I am pleased you have enjoyed working at the school, and as I said at the interview you have demonstrated a real talent for the work. I hope at some point you will be able to pursue it as a career.

If circumstances change , and you are ready to develop your career, I would be pleased to hear from you. I would also be happy to write a reference if another opportunity in a different school arises.

All the best,
Debbie

That's nice isn't it? She didn't have to send that especially as I won't be returning after holidays.

Silverymoon - that was lovely and will be a huge help if another job in the same sort of field comes you way - good result & well done

sun is shining which always helps lift oooggs mood

hello all

SM that is a nice letter, I'm sure she will give you a good reference and hopefully you'll find something a bit closer to home with colleagues that aren't more childish than the kids!

DD went back to hospital last night to see the 'kids bone specialist' and he put her arm in a plaster cast She has to keep it on for 2 weeks so we will have to get it taken off back in the UK. Poor little thing is quite upset and this will bugger up a lot of our plans. Such a shame as weather really hotting up here now (around 30 degrees) and I'd wanted to get in a few pool sessions before we left on Wednesday night. Oh well, at least there is a grand prix to look forward to this morning

Hello.
I saw STW briefly in Kingston today. She's looking well and her dc's are lovely.
Can't believe how big S is, much bigger than Luke! Got us thinking about the summer meet-up.........................................are we doing one this year?
Hope so, would be lovely to see some of the lo's

SM - that's a lovely letter from the head. Sounds like you'll get a good reference and hopefully, despite the nightmare you've had, the work experience you have now will really help you. lovely to hear you've seen STW. Summer meet up sounds good - I'm in if there's one planned!

MoS - so sorry to hear that DD has to have a plaster cast now. At least will be abit cooler for her over here...

mos.... don't worry, they adapt to the cast very quickly at that age... the time will fly I promise, dd was in her full leg cast for 9 weeks and honestly it went in a flash and she barely remembers it now!

If your dd was going to be in it any longer i'd suggest one of these to make washing easier, she could even go swimming in it as they are watertight. i don't know if it would be worth it for 2 weeks though, you'd barely have it before she's out of the cast!

How is A doing today SummerRain? I think Danny was being a pain in the bum in sympathy with A over the weekend - refusing to eat any food whatsoever, v grumpy, demanding boob or drinks only and uber clingy.. really rather annoying. And then he topped it all off by deliberately running into the road - thank god there were no cars anywhere near him. Think my heart actually stopped!

So we are now in the final countdown to moving back into our house. Cant wait! Though Danny will be very sad to no longer be sharing with DS1 - he used to wake and yell "mummy, daddy!" - this morning he woke and said "Josh... Josh.. light on!" So cute.

I'm up for a summer meet up (with and without kids!) Am back from 1st July until at least start of September, if not permanently!