October 2010 Arrivals Lounge

[SeaShellsOnTheSeaShore]

Welcome, check in is now open!

After yesterday I can join the locked out the house club!

Unfortunately dd was in the house, alone at the time and I had no phone or the number to ring my bro who has a spare key.

All ended well however and got back in after 20 mins and a long chain of phone calls made form a neighbour's house.

I think my heart did temporarily stop however.

Ooh, I am liking how you are taking to my new name! :) 'Hun' is fine by me, though it's very un-MNy! I guess I like that too! :)

FT, hope DS gets better soonest.
I think I produce about the same from each side - not a scientific response as it's hard to gauge, but feels pretty equal.

Aw, ILGH, glad they took it well.

H, everybody needs a bosom for a pillow!

Guess we are lucky as we can't lock ourselves out - have to use the key to lock the door behind us. Only problem would be if we lost the key whilst out.

We used to have a lock you locked after you but just got new ones

Oh ivy that must have been horrible! Glad your neighbours were in

Ds does the boob hugging too,and at night he feeds almost to sleep then pulls off and rests his cheek against by boob and goes to sleep, very funny.

sheidbug I hope your adventure into belfast goes well today
floozie I hope ds is feeling better
ilgh love the image of you telling them off! I would have done the sane though, sleep is very precious right now!

Hello everyone.

I've yet to catch up with all your news but will do soon. We've had a bit of a rubbish time hence me not posting as no internet access.

On 24th Nov my dog tripped me over when I was carrying DD in a cross body sling. I fell completly on her on the pavement outside our house. After an MRI scan and a CT scan she was diagnosed with a fractured skull and 2 bleeds in her brain. One at the site of the fracture and the other where her brain knocked onto her skull on the other side. She was an absolute star and only needed calpol that afternoon, fed straight away and that night in the hospital despite being in a hideous cot and not able to have mummy cuddles she did brilliantly (feeling awful writing this). She would not drop off to sleep without me holding her hand which was very sweet. 2 days later I was treated to my first smile. Everyone else had received one- just not me. Apparently the brain bleeds may cause future seizures but the scans were done 5 hours after the event and the bleeds were very small and stable. She did not fit early on so they believe its unlikely she'll have a future problem, but there is no telling and seizures could happen in years time. So sad I broke our perfect little girl. However you'd never know she'd had an accident as her recovery has been astounding.

Then, to top all of that, she had a hip scan the other day and her femurs are not sitting in the hip sockets enough so now she's wearing a harness to bring her legs into the frog position. No clothes fit and she ends up wearing long dresses to cover her up a bit in the cold. Unlike the other babies in the clinic she was outraged by the harness fitting and the consultant really struggled to get her in one and she's so strong that her legs are not as frogged as they should be as the consultant could not manipulate her. She's allowed out of it for 20 mins a day so we use that time for her to have a lovely kick about in the bath. She loathes going back in and screams. However she's ok once in. She'll be like that for 6 weeks to 3 months.

On the plus side, she's sleeping through alternate nights and when she is up its only once.

Ooh and I too locked myself out of the house- more of which later. We're moving house at the moment so must go and help. I hope you're all doing better than us! x x

Oh Elsa, your poor dd and poor you. I cried. I hope to God all stays well. So sorry. I am terrified my cat trips me up as he weaves in and out of my legs and is really pissing me off. I'm afraid he may have to go now.

Hope your move goes well. And ((( hugs))) to you all.

Oh Elsa that's horrid. An accident is an accident and you must not blame yourself. You must not. Something sort of similar happened to a friend and her mum, fortunately everyone was ok but still very very scary.

My friends little girl also had to be a cast from the waist down at a very young age and it is hard.

I am having a tough time tbh. DS is not sleeping during the day AT ALL. Sleeps in the early evening. After his midnight/1/2am feed depending on when he wakes up, he is then awake til the next feed, goes back to sleep around 5ish and then wakes again at 6ish and then that is it for the day.

To top it off I have had thrush and so has he, and now yesterday I was diagnosed with madness suspected mastitis and a rotten rotten cold. So I am feeling so very sorry for myself.

At the mo, DS is swaddled (badly) in his bouncy chair with some white noise playing and amazingly he is snoozing. He has not slept at this time of day for a couple of weeks.

Also to add to the trauma, he wont stop crying unless feeding. Even being held he cries. Not sure if this is the colic. I am wondering whether to introduce a dummy?

I also want to start expressing but now I am thinking I should maybe wait til the mastitis has gone or when life is a bit less traumatic. I really hsve no idea. What do you think?

Secondly, do you have any routines? Eg during the day DS is with me downstairs and I normally stick him in his bouncer for catnaps and its only when I go to bed or HI comes up that he then comes up to our room and is put in his Moses. We are not bathing him every night, just every so often or when he's made a right royal mess of himself. I'd be interested to know what you guys do and also can you remind me how old your babes are? DS is gonna be 6 wks on Monday.

OMG elsa poor you & dd. Is the leg thing clocky hips? Friends dd had them but didn't pick it up til she was 4 & was horrendous dealing with cast etc then so better to get it done now.

Silver-don't express til the thrush has gone unless it's to feed that day as you can't freeze it. Dd3 is 9 weeks and sort of has a routine. Wakes at 2/5 in the night but starting to get slightly later to 3/6 last couple of days. If she is ip at 5 we go back to sleep. She then feeds on & off until School run or shopping then sleeps in the pram. Has lunch at lunchtime & then on off naps to teatime when she feeds again then on off feeds/sleeps til 8 ish. She is mainly fitting around the big dds! She has been all over while we were stuck in but better yesterday after going out in the pram.

n I was thinking of feeding the same day. I cant see anymore white on his tongue but now that I have mastitis I have painful boobs so GP said to carry on with cream/gel for now as the antibiotics I am on may bring the thrush back. Wonderful eh?

Does your DD nap downstairs or is she upstairs/monitor on etc?

When you put her to bed at 8 is that upstairs or does she stay downstairs with you til you go to bed?

I have realised that I am not really sure what I am doing1

Elsa - huge hugs to you and a gentle one to dd-accidents happen but what a horrible time for you all.
Glad to hear she is on the mend - they are amazing aren't they :)

Silver- you must be getting shattered! Check with the ff and bf threads re expressing, but I think it can help to get rid ifthe mastitis (throw the milk if your concerned re antibiotics and LO?) certainly recommend starting so LO can take a bottle.

Re sleep- they say if day time naps get sorted, night time gets better too. LO is still so little though, things will naturally get easier over the next month. Dd has 2 big nap periods a day, around 8-10ish and 12-3ish, and cat naps other times. Hard to keep her asleep beyond that first 45min sleep cycle. She isn't bathed each night, but changed and put into pjs and sleeping bag to watch in the night garden with Ds and have her big evening feed.

Didn't use a dummy with ds1 and prob should have in retrospect as he was a colicky crying baby. Dd has one some of the time
And it works well for us.

Re Thinking you don't know what your doing- you actually do, all mums muddle though, especially first babies...that's why mn has 800k members. If every else knew everything, we wouldn't need mn and the wealth of information the collective has!

(reread my post-i don't mean she sleeps 3hrs at a trot in the day time, just she sleep/wake/sleep around that time)

Oh elsa poor you and dd it must have been a terrible shock. It was an accident though and I hope that you will be able to stop feeling guilty, it wasn't your fault. How tough to have the hip thing on top of that. But it will be worth it to get them fixed, and she would find it much more frustrating to have them treated when she is older and trying to get mobile.

silver not sure I know what I' m doing either, but then I think babies are quite changeable still at this age.we try and have a rough routine but sometimes ds is just hungrier/sleepier so we stay flexible with times. When he wakes I the morning he has a feed, nappy change and quick sponge wash then he has some awake time either chatting with us or on his playmat, when he gets tired I offer him another feed if he wants then we try and get out for a walk. When he gets back and wakes we start the eat/nappy/play sleep cycle all over again. So he tends to sleep mid morning, late lunch, mid afternoon etc. Early evening we try and bath him at least every other night. Then he feeds as often as he wants and sleeps on me or in his pram downstairs. He just goes up to bed with us when we do. Then he stays in bed with us and feeds to sleep. He sometimes wakes twice in the night for food, other times he sleeps through.

Silver_- we keep her with us asleep on one of us until we get round to a monitor. Try acidophelous ( good bacteria) in between anti b to try & prevent thrush. Leave a gap though between tablets as the anti bs will kill it.

Elsa Oh you poor thing, that must have been such a horrid time for you. Please don't blame yourself, it was an accident. But your DD sounds like a right trooper. I'm sorry about the hips as well.

Silver I don't think anyone really knows what they're doing, I don't tbh. I just hope the fact that he occasionally smiles at me means I must be doing something right.

We do now have a bedtime routine which has partly been driven by DS putting himself into a routine and us introducing a bit of one for him. He generally has a bath about 7pmish, some baby massage on the changing mat with the olive oil (partly to help with his colic and also to help his dry skin). He then gets popped in his grobag and has a feed and a cuddle with me and DH. We also turn the main light off and are just a bit quieter with him as well.

I don't know about you, but at around five weeks DS became a bit more alert and interested in stuff and it was at this point that he started becoming a bit more of a handful. He got a bit like your DS, just kept screaming and wouldn't settle for anything and generally got a bit beyond himself. I think at this point I was missing his sleepy cues like chomping on his hands, shaking his head from side to side and the classic yawning. Since I've cottoned on to these little things and through a bit of trail and error I have discovered that he likes to be put down in his pram with his dummy for a bit of quiet time to himself. Since I've done this with him, he's been a bit better (we've also been doing the whole infacol/gripe water for the colic as well). I'm not saying thats the solution for you, but it seems to have worked for us.

Regarding the dummy, we've got one with DS. I've been using the Nuby ones, I was just using it at night but it has gotten to the point that during the day that he doesn't settle to sleep unless he's having a good old suck on it. I also use it to get him over the trama of being put in a car seat. It may be that your DS is a sucky baby, you can always try him with one and see if he takes it.

Ivy You poor thing, gosh we're a right bunch aren't we. Maybe we should have a secret stash of housekeys hidden away somewhere.

I'm still waiting to hear about my cousin, they broke her waters earlier today and her FB has been very very quiet. I'm sure it's all go for her at the moment.

elsa sorry to hear about your accident and it's great she seems to be ok. Please don't punish yourself!

silver I don't have a clue what I'm doing tbh just muddling through each day. We seem to have settled on a kind-of routine naturally in just the last week or so. (dd is 7 weeks now)

8pm to midnight-ish she sleeps downstairs on sofa with us watching TV/tidying up/me expressing etc. I them go up to bed around midnight and do a last feed for as long as I can keep her interested for! Sleep until 3/4 am when she wakes for another feed. Wakes again 7/8 am. At which point I either get up or try to do another feed and put her back down to sleep - depends if she is playing ball or not.

Other than that I feed around every 3 hours during the day and she either sleeps or doesn't sleep - it depends where we are ie. if at baby group etc she tends to stay awake as more stimulated.

I was really anti-dummies but after the first few nights of 14+ hours crying bought some to see if it settled her. She removed it and chucked it away and have tried a couple of times since but she isn't interested.

My revised parenting strategy is if it gives you some much needed rest - try everything & anything.

I've just been reading on a FB group I'm on and someone was talking about giving their baby 'morning' breastmilk in a bottle at night as it's supposed to be creamier. Apparently the LO settled really well for the first time in ages.

They were also talking about how the group was a yummy Mummys group. My friend called me a yummy Mummy the other day as well. I didn't much care for it tbh. I think I've been on MN too long .

I am the furthest thing possible from being a yummy mummy I assure you.

When your babies are awake during the day, what do you do with them? Eg leave them, play (if playing what kind of playing?) etc etc

Thanks for all your posts and comments. I am in a bit of a state through all the constant crying and lack of sleep.

Oh the constant crying must be tough silver but thank you for asking these questions its useful hearing what others do!
When ds is awake it depends a bit what mood he's in, sometimes he goes on his playmat and wriggles while I get on with housework, or sometimes he sits on our laps and 'chats' or I show him a book. Sometimes he prefers to be carried around in which case we look at christmas lights or go and smile at our reflections in the mirror or we dance round to music. Sometime when I am lazy he sits on my lap and 'watches' tv!! sometimes he doesn't like hiss playmat but likes to lie on the sofa and just look around and talk to himself (we put footstool and cushions to stop him falling off).dh is more 'silly' with him and presses his nose and makes funny noises, flies him round the room as a 'bomber' plane or gets him to 'stalk' me as I am doing the housework! Oh and sometimes I do baby massage for him too. Would love to know what other people do though!

Silver I stick DS under the baby gym in the morning, I also talk to him and pull faces at him if he wants attention. I also shake a rattley donkey at him occasionally. Otherwise I just leave him.

Dd has to entertain herself alot of the time as Ds1 is full on and needs constant entertaining and policing. When i can spend time just her and I we indulge ourselves with sofa cuddles and grinning at each other! Otherwise she is in her playpen or Propped up on the sofa watching us.

Games become alot more interactive soon-although she enjoyed peekaboo earlier!

Silver- we chat,sing, bouncy chair,changing mat,watch me/dh tidy. She liked watching the shower today, she loves watching the big dds and she chats to the curtain pole & Daddy's light!

How long are people having off work?feel like my mat leave is getting shorter & I planned a year this time :(
It decreased to 6( possibly 9) depending on if dh gets a job & now I've applied for a new job it may be 4 m. :(
It's what I had with the others but a bit sad as she is my last. I have to look long term with this job as I'll be able to go home at lunch & not work v long days every week

I'm having to apply for jobs so it will be dependent on that. Unfortunately it's unlikely to be a year this time as we need the money ( though childcare is so expensive I need to earn £10 per hr to cover costs, post tax!!! Never mind pension and student loan contributions)

Morning everyone.

Silver have you tried cranial osteopathy? It may calm him a bit. I tried DD with a dummy when she had an afternoon of fretting and nothing would settle her. It didn't work. It was a latex one, so at another time I tried the other type. Both times she spat them out with a look of disgust on her face. I managed to settle her on a train the other day by letting her suck on my thumb knuckle as the train was too crowded to find a seat to feed her. It worked but not to make her sleepy, just calmer.

Hermya its interesting that your DS's sleepy signs are the head shaking etc as those are my DD's hungry signals. Funny aren't they?!

DD has recently started being able to settle herself to sleep which is nice. She still feeds forever though.

She's carved out her own routinish that has also been supplemented by us since she's been in the harness. She's allowed out for 20 mins a day so that becomes bath time. So its up early morning between 0700-0800 for a feed where she feeds for an hour. She then sleeps again, has another feed and is up for most of the afternoon. She hates to be left to amuse herself (I think she can't see the point of being awake and not receiving attention.)so she spends time in her vibrating bouncy chair which is when she's awake and I need to get on (the dangly elephant was treated to a grin the other day). Otherwise she gets cuddles, sits on my knee and watches a bit of telly, gazes around her that kind of thing. She interacts a little bit but not much. She then sleeps early evening then its feed, bath, feed bed. During the day she feeds 2-3 hourly and has a monster session in the evening and either sleeps through or is up once depending on how long she's fed for in the evening. For sleeps she's in her moses basket in the day downstairs and in her amby nest upstairs at night. Night time and the morning sleep are signified by wearing a sleepsuit and sleeping bag. She was swaddled until the hip harness went on.

I'm on mat leave until Oct 11.

Thank you all for your kind words. It means a lot to me. x x