March 2010 - Six months in - will they ever sleep?

[Arcadie]

Welcome to the latest thread for mums of babies born in March ( and a few in Feb and one in April!).

Come on in. Find out who'll be pg next and who's weaning onto what.

What pixie said - was just about to more or less post exactly the same!!
And sariska - jeez - I give my kids out of date FOOD the entire time.... proud emoticon.....It never did me any harm (pock marked sandwiches in my packed lunch because mum would pick the mould bits out of the bread and make the sarnie anyway) Isn't there some sort of study anyway saying that linctus doesn't do much anyway?!! (not questioning your choice of medicine, just think your DH is barking )
it does sound like you need to take a leaf out of rkd's mantra and Talk About It However Painful . Somehow... And turn Maria Callas off!!!!!!! She's NEVER going to get your head sorted!!!
Big hugs though, these babies are a blessing but boy are they sent to try us too. We Are ALL Very Tired - and i don't know about anyone else but i'm apt to say things i normally wouldn't...

iwcas really sorry to hear things aren't great - completely feel your pain, you poor thing. HAve you tried swaddling again? I still can't get Thea off to sleep without her arms being tightly clamped to her side. She's now in a sleeping bag so we've had to be slightly ingenious with our choice of swaddlage...i know he sucks his thumb but you could try one arm swaddling?? or swaddle both but his sucky side you could swaddle up to his face....(sorry badly explained). And as for formula, it won't do him any harm and as oyu say will ensure others can help. I wouldn't look down the long tunnel of 18 months more though unless that is what you want to do - IME even excl bfed babies are drinking cows milk by 12 months out of some sort of beaker/doidy etc, by their own choice....and remember you can get calcium etc into him in other ways once he's older - cheese sauce, yoghurts, salmon, sardines etc etc. It's all doable. hope tonight he turns a corner for you though.

The Elk is in a travel cot and has screamed herself to sleep.
Thea, meanwhile, took one look at her sister and fell asleep, more or less as a two fingers up to her and her dramatics . She is 6 months old today.....wow.

right time to get some sort of evening going before i go to bed.....
ooooh spooks is back on, goodo!!

Wow - everyone is having a tough time tonight.

IWCAS I am amazed that you have managed not to shout at DS for a whole 6 months. At the Dizzi house my poor DD gets shouted at all the time when DS is crying, which is much worse as it actually hurts her feelings and it isn't at all her fault that DS is crying. .

Sariska I hope it has helped to let the thought escape on here. Is it the stress of the baby making things difficult or is there a fundamental problem? Like BT says, It's good to talk...

Melk Well done on getting them both to sleep. Remember, ttsp.

My turn to moan

DS had his first 4 hours with our new CM today and it didn't go great. It turns out that she just couldn't get him to sleep. He screamed and screamed even when she was holding him.
He has always been really difficult to get to sleep - from when he was born really. I have to feed/walk/rock him to sleep. I can't do CC (I have tried for all of 5 minutes and then caved in). I have made half-arsed attempts at Pick-up/Put-down but each time I though 'he is still small, ttsp'.
But now we have a problem because the CM can't spend all her time settling him when she has other DCs to look after...

I have a job interview tomorrow so I am leaving him with her again. I hope I will be able to stop myself thinking about a screaming DS...

Moan over.

On a good note: wasn't the weather absolutely lovely today (down where I am in any case)?

oh ladies it's a bad night isn't it :-(
DH and I have a frosty silence going on here too so sariska you are not alone! Our battle is over the bottle. DD2 took a bottle of EBM last night from DH which was a great step in the right direction. Tonight she completely refused it. He didn't want me to comfort her and give her boobie as that teaches her that if she cries she gets what she wants. All my mummy instincts are to comfort a crying child and really if she doesn't want a bottle then I will try but I will not force her and ultimately she was tired and needed a wee top up before being put up to her cot. I did cuddle her and BFed and she conked out a happy girl. He thinks a bit of screaming does no harm. I think that leaving a baby to cry is wrong. I know others do it and I'm not judging but I can't and won't do it. Right rant over on to more helpful tips:
pixie I think BMI has come up with your solution, new outfits and photos in old gown sound like the perfect compromise.
colds nasosal like melk said plus Boots do a baby version of Vicks which is suitable from 3m so rub that on their chest and there is a childs version of Olbas oil so dab that on a muslin or something and drape it near the cot. Please note I do not suck snot out my babies nose but I am addicted to picking the dry ones out with my pinkie nail.
IWCAS do you think it is the teething that is upsetting R and making him wake so frequently. Aside from you coughing that is? I know Baby G will wake when I cough and I have a very slight tickle at the moment so I try and cough really, really quietly and it still makes her open her eyes. I would suggests all of my teething solutions to you which are Ashton and Parsons powders ( I also use chamomilla homeopathic stuff but I've realise that the MMM are not into my homeopathic suggestions) calgel or bongela and then last resort if nothing else will work then calpol.
Baby G is still waking in the night for feeds but I am lucky in that she does go back to sleep pretty quickly. I am also lucky in that she sleeps pretty well for naps in the daytime too. She has really taken to her comforter that I bought and she is also partial to pulling a muslin up over her face in a comforting manner. It's almost like magic, if I put her down in her buggy or cot she can fuss about for a minute or so while I locate muslin and comforter but once she has these in her hand it's like her sleep cue and she's off . Anyway just tossing these ideas about to see if it will help anyone else get some precious sleep.
Melk I hope you get Elk back to a good sleep routine. We don't do any of the stuff arcadie mentioned we just say 'bed time now, nappy on, jammies on, teeth bed' and off she goes! When she gets into bed we talk about our day and I ask her who she loves and tell her what we are doing the next day and night night off I go! and is also very attached to her snuggles/comforter. We have had very few times when she has called to us after bed time since moving to her big girls bed (toddler bed not full sized single) and we have always been pretty stern with her. She never gets to come back out the room. I think it's a slippery slope if you let them back out as then they know if they cry/moan/keep on at it long enough you will crack. To me dealing with a 2.5 year old is very different to dealing with a 6m - a toddler can manipulate you I don't think at 6m they can (although DH disagrees - see 1st part of epic post!)
manda good to see you back again. How is the lovely James? Your DK outfit sounds lovely and a bit of glam always cheers a girl up. So you think you might be our first pregnant MMM? How exciting keeping fingers crossed for you. and you are now famous, what with PD and her BF thread making 'Mumnet latest' and pixie getting angry and our new recruit toostressed stirring up the old son/daughter debate the MMM are getting right out there!

flip you are off on holiday again but give me a shout if you want to talk nappies anytime. Who are you thinking of being a rep for?
rebecca there was another smear thread just the other day. Have. You. Booked. Yours. Yet. ? I will keep nagging you know
Hope the restless babies following holidays are getting better. Although it is easy to blame the holiday for a change in routine I think teething and weaning have a lot to answer for as well. DD2 hasn't had a pooey nappy in the morning for ages but she did today following an enthusiastic go at fish pie last night, well I say fish pie it was mostly the mash off the top but it was sufficiently sticky so that she could get it to her mouth with the potato still attached to the spoon whereas our weetabix and yogurt attempts are less successful as she doesn't like me spoon feeding but she isn't great at getting the spoon to her mouth before the food departed from the spoon. She is enjoying the classic BLW food of broccoli while her big sis looks on in amazement and I reassure her that she used to like broccoli and did exactly the same as DD2 but she looks at me with that 'no mummy' face!
on the crawling DD2 is managing to get her front up or her bum up but not both at the same time. I have tried to ask DD1 to show her how to crawl, which she did but DD2 didn't manage to copy her very successfully. She can roll all over the place now and if left on the floor will be in the opposite corner by the time I return from the loo. She wedged herself between the telly and the chair this afternoon and after all the physical activity promptly fell asleep (but I moved her to the buggy for a proper nap so that DD1 didn't stand on her)
Right I'm sure I had some more constructive/sympathetic things to say but I've waffled on for long enough so it's time to say night night.

oh and IWCAS you would have thought I was trying to feed DD2 poison the other night when I tried our first bottle of actimel aptamil. And that reminds me Melk what was your Dr thinking when he said that thrush was 'trendy' what an absurd thing to say!
shroomer how are you doing?
arcadie how is DH doing?
thoughts also to evitas mum and pacifics dad.
Right I am going to bed now.
Oh and good luck pixie in your 2ww

oh gosh, poor everyone sounds like a bad day or two all round.

smac - that sounds EXACTLY like the kind of disagreement I have with DH - I think mothers have a biological instinct to protect their young baby at all costs which fathers don't have, and that's why the crying is beyond unbearable for us but they are fine with it. Sometimes my DH starts with a bit of a funny anecdote when DS has started crying in his cot and I get so that he can even THINK about telling me a story in his chipper little voice when MY BABY is SUFFERING!!!

sariska I would also react in the same way but I'm sure he doesn't think you're anything but a wonderful mother. Hope things are better today

pixie - yes two new outfits and pic in old one is a great compromise

IWCAS Hope you were wrong and he actually slept for hours and hours It's so hard but you are doing a great job

dizzi for you too! How horrid that he was crying for the CM even though I suppose it is to be expected. FWIW 2 weeks in my DS has settled really well with our nanny and now takes a bottle from her no problem - and this is after his 8hour-self-starving sessions and lots of crying. So although it will probably take a while I'm sure he'll get there...

Aaaaggh supposed to be writing this really important funding application at work but instead have been trying to get cheap panto tickets for DD and looking at MN MUST do some work, must do some work....

Sariska Felt very at your post. Know EXACTLY what you mean by babies putting intolerable stress on a marriage. In the nearly 5 years we've been parents our relationship has really suffered. But it can be fixed. Hang in there - be honest and open and prepared to give DH some chance to vent. He'll no doubt find baby hard work as well and you CAN be a support to each other. But MY WORD is it hard to be nice to your other half when the baby is screaming. You have any support? Any grandparent living nearby who can listen to LO cry babysit while you get some DW and DH time together? I know DH and I get to screaming and EVERYTHING YOU SAY NIGGLES ME point a lot quicker when we've had no face-to-face time reminding ourselves why we got married in the first place. Again - hope it passes very soon.

"And the Prize for the Most Epic Post Goes To..... " Ladies and gentleMAN (bookworm where are you???) She's been there with us from the start...she loves a good cloth nappy...she's already won several prizes on this thread most notably for Biggest Baby....Please give it up to....SMAC!!!!!"

Amazing entry, smac, good on you, not just for the brain cells that post must have taken...

dizzi sorry about CM - agree with DrSkid and hope it gets better. I still have the occasional huge tantrum from DD1 about her CM and I know it's all completely for my viewing..I know she's not 6 months but fingers crossed it passes asap, sounds most stressful for you.

wise words as ever from RKD - i didn't actually kiss DH once yesterday, let alone have any sort of contact/conversation with him other than about the kids...i realised this as i turned over in bed to go to sleep....and I let my eyes close as i realised this because I was Just TOO Damn Tired...ho hum....

night all

Evening, ladies, we are currently eating chilli con carne for the 3rd night in a row (DH made it, his speciality, and it would be rude to let any of it go to waste ) and watching DH's 'other woman' aka Sarah Beeney rescuing some poor sod's house - as we will never ever renovate anything ever again (gutted and rebuilt 2 houses, that's me done on the home improvement front...) I find I can now watch these kind of programs without having panic attacks .

Pixie, you made me feel (slightly) less embarrassed at my emotional outburst with your admission of misting up at RobotWars !
Hope your DD's asthma is behaving itself. And I have nothing to add to the excellent Christening-Gown-Dilemma-Advice you've already been given.
I am still agonising over the nanny/CM decision, but will just go back to work and see how we go in the short run - well, there is no way, I could sort out/find a nanny in the remaining time anyway.

TooBlessed, hope your DD is better. We've all just got over an absolutely stinking cold that made me cough to the point of retching and all the wonderful BM did not prevent Joe from catching it, boo hiss! Melk's advice is very comprehensive - plus lots off mummy cuddles, I find, are always required when they are ill.

Thank you for your kind words. I am feeling a bit better today (just knowing that there is a Club of Struggling Mothers makes me feel much better).

Dizzi, I'm not sure of the answer to your question but I am hoping that RKD is right when she talks about the need for some DH and DW time to remind us of why we married. I think she probably is but it's really hard sometimes to get past the snarling and the silences to talk and to just relax together. But I'm going to try anyway. Dunno if that makes any kind of sense - haven't been on the vino again tonight, honest.

Uh oh. Baby awake.

Sariska Glad you're feeling a bit better. Go find DH - give him a hug even if you don't want to and tell him that you're glad to be in this parenthood thing together. You'll fill his emotional love tank!

. pacific they just quoted you on The Wright Show. You are the most famous person I know officially.

Really siamese? That is awesome, go PD!

Good morning
It seems that the last couple of days haven?t been easy.
DS and I have a nasty cold... and nights have been terrible, waking every single hour! And the worst part is that I need to come to work !
We had a lovely (but exhausting) time back home. DS was a little start, always smiling, however on the way back home he cried about 1 hour during our 2 and half hours flight

Sariska hope things are better. It?s such a pressure... you are not alone, we are all in the same boat.

PD 8 teeth?!

IWCAS how was the night? Did he sleep in his cot?

Dizzi hope things are improving with the CM. DS will start going to the CM in January and I?m already nervous about it. Good luck!

DrSkidaddle it?s impressive how we can find so many distractions at work (look at me, typing here instead of writing my thesis)

Melk Hope the sleeping is better.

Waves to everyone else. I really need to do some work
x

siamese - in what context???????!!!!!!!

I've x post Siamese - please tell us more about our celebrity PD :)

Is it not a case of mistaken identity?? I never watch the Wright Show but it hadn't been me who started that thread . And I had not said anything particularly clever/witty/amazing

Guess what, lovely lovely HV has just taken Joe away in the pram for an hour - admittedly a perk as I know her through work, but wow! How nice is that?!

Time to MN tidy the house...

BTW, 8 teeth in 10 days was DS 2, not Joe; he is on 3.

Have a good one everybody .

The Wright Stuff, even . Told you, I don't watch it...

I'm on holiday in Cornwall so I was only watching that idiot because it's raining (excuses first). They were doing a piece on mixed teenage sleepovers as per the recent mn thread. Except this time they credited mn and quoted posters (normally they just nick popular threads for the show and pretend they don't. ) and they quoted pacific and dumbledorina. I think pacific must've said something unWright stuff (good!) as he laughed. Sadly I was too slow to catch what you said PD (it was on screen) but I'm sure I Agree! :)

omg we are not worthy!!!!