October 2010 pregnancy thread - welcome to the other side....

[Hevster]

Well ladies, it's a bit in advance but here is the new thread, started especially early for Saartjie!

Haha Dilly, I knew what u meant by "no one"! DD is 8.5 wks now so feel like the slack I have been cutting myself has come to an end now! But you're right it is still early days and I'm probably expecting too much too soon.

Re weight, I put on about 2.5 stone, lost the first stone within the first 3 weeks or so post-birth then haven't lost any more since. It's all still on my thighs, hips and bum. I have the feeling that all the weight that is going to naturally "just fall off" has already done so, and the rest is going to take some sweat and tears to remove!

Hev I'm glad it's not just me, and I'm so with you on having been too lax with discipline etc!

Well, DS is sleeping soundly in bed and DD is cuddled up with DH watching the Rugby Club (well DH is watching, DD is sleeping, for the minute) so I am off to do the washing up then bed!

hi all

dilly, babyb - i hear you both with feeding frenzies!

my DD has had a cold for over a week now. It has meant that she finds it v difficult to sleep at night. She gets all bunged up. We have put her moses basket on a bit of an angle, we have tried the snot sucker thing (revolting!), saline drops, humidifiers - you name it - and nothing is making it go away. We have been picking her up at night because she is so bunged up and I suspect that she may now be getting in bad habits. She is very difficult to settle in the day and wants to be cuddled all the time .

She is also snacking terribly. She often feeds for less than 10 minutes (sometimes only 5) and is then hungry again 1 hour later. Feeding on demand is all well and good but when it's every hour it's a nightmare! A good stretch for her is 2.5 hours. I am exhausted!

Any tips from anyone able to persuade feeding for more than 10 minutes gratefully received.

Jacks - I have just ordered a Kari-me. She doesnt seem to do crying for no reason, but she is just grouchy and hates being left alone.

I worry it's another bad habit...

She's only 3 weeks though. I feel mean trying to get her to understand!

x

Hello everyone...
Can I join you guys? I was due on Dec 5th when my 35 weeks old baby decided to come to this world on Oct 31st. I went through an EMSC as my baby was in distress and labour wasn't progressing. So I ended up being an Oct mum... Funny coincidence as at the time I loved lurking around your ante-natal club reading your birth stories... So I do know some of you guys :)

I would love to be part of your post natal club so I can learn from you guys.. I must confess that in the last 3 weeks I haven't been online much due to the crazy every 2 hours feeding schedule for a preterm baby and the expressing after each feeding session. But I am getting better and even last night we managed to go out for a meal with the LO :)

Hope all is well.

Hi can I join as well? My LO, Dexter was born on 26th October so is nearly 4 weeks old. I was induced a week early because I had gestational diabetes and labour came on really quickly-within an hour of the pessary being put in. I had an epidural in the end which was FAB! Definately having one next time!

Now at 4 weeks we're having trouble at night (put a post about it in 'sleep' at 2am while trying to get him to settle!

Looking forward to getting to know you all :)

Hey lovelies, just saying hello. DS asleep in his moses basket and the DSS's playing very noisily but he's oblivious. I'm going to have to wake him though - we're still on weekly weigh ins and I'm paranoid about missing a 3hrly feed in the day. So, as far as feeding frenzies, snacking etc is concerned I'm terrible cos I'll let him get away with anything... don't ask me for advice, I will corrupt your LOs . We also co-sleep tho his Papa does the 11pmish feed with EBM and can get him to settle in the moses basket and sleep till 3am - how does he do it?

Welcome newbies! Lovely to meet you!

Those wanting to lose weight - 2lb per week is optimum so you don't put it back on, your weight guru has spoken so no crash diets please! I still haven't weighed myself...eeek!

Thank you for the welcome dilly!
Re: weight loss, I weighed myself the night before I went into hospital then a few days after I had him. Biggest. Weight drop. Ever! I'm sure if you've been bfing you will have lost a fair bit. Don't be scared of the scales (I was terrified of them when I was pregnant)

Hi all and welcome pinkhyena and PJen. Hope you've all had a good weekend.

Re weightloss - I weighed myself about 4 days after giving birth and I had only lost 7 pounds (my DS weighed in at 7 pounds!) . I was not amused. He is now 4 weeks old (today in fact ) and I've lost about another 9 pounds. I fortunately only put on 2 stone whilst pregnant, and refuse to diet until after Christmas. Until then I'm just breastfeeding and hoping for the best!

I'm still BFing on demand but he tends to want feeding every 3 hours at night, but can occassionaly last 4 hours during the day. Do you think I'm being unreasonable to want longer between feeds at night? And any idea how I can acheive this (without leaving him to cry)?

Also, I've just got a breastpump (mainly so that I can go to my work Christmas party!). Any top tips for expressing? I'm a bit scared to leave myself short of milk for DS while I'm expressing.

Sorry for the long post, and thanks in advance for any advice!

Jenko the theory is that you tank them up during the evening and them do a dreamfeed and they should start to go longer at night, it's a bit of a pain in the arse and DD1 never got the hang it but it's worth a go. We feed at 7am, 10, 13, 16 and then start tanking so feed at 18 and 20 then dream feed at 23ish. The dream feed is the most important but it can take a while to teach them to eat in their sleep! Am no help with the breast feeding but we are down to 1 feed at night and if she wakes asking for another she gets in bed with me and doesn't get the milk coz it will mess up the 7am feed. However I do have a very obliging baby so far unlike her sister!

Hevster how do you dreamfeed? I know it sounds like a stupid question but when LO falls asleep mid feed it's impossible to get him to have anymore!

Jenko, I was expressing for a while, I'd do it once LO was napping because it can take a while, what pump have you got? You won't leave yourself short don't worry!
X

Pinkhyena sorry forgot to welcome you and Pjen very rude of me.

Dream feed - in theory the baby is asleep and you pick them out of bed and feed them as normal but they stay asleep. I have only done it with a bottle (you could express and use a bottle for this feed) but my best mate breast feeds a dream feed no probs. It took a couple of days for DD2 to get the hang of it but she does it just fine now without stiring at all and sometimes feeds in the day without waking up now!. It's all in the baby whisperer book which in my opinion is worth it's weight in gold if you're not a Gina Ford type (bit of a softer approach) and solved a lot of issues for us with DD1

Hevster Thanks for the advice. I will try dreamfeeding, but DS always needs a nappy change after a feed, and this wakes him up too much and then he won't settle again. I will also try binge-feeding in the evening and see how we get on. I guess it's still early days but we have to start incorporating these things sooner rather than later (for my sanity more than anything!).

Pink I've got an Avent electric pump. I've set it all up and am just waiting for DS to fall asleep and I'll try it out - it looks like an instrument of torture !!

Hi all,

Can I join in? Had my DS on 1st November, he was due on 30th, very traumatic birth and have just about recovered. Have been following your thread with interest and relief that I am not alone!!

My wee one is three weeks old now and we are about to venture to the local bf support group. He has been a great feeder but has been quite frantic recently which I assume is a growth spurt...I also want to find out if I can express now and not confuse him too much, would love my DH to do a few feeds to give me more than three hours sleep.

Hello all...very interested in the feeding discussion. LO is more 'organised' at night than at any other time - feeds around 11 or midnight (bottle of EBM from his Papa while I sleep!) then again at about 3 am and then at 6 or 7 depending... I can't settle him back in his moses basket probably because I can't wait for him to fall deeply enough asleep without falling deeply asleep myself! So he sleeps on my chest or next to me - he hates to sleep on his back though I know why he should - how on earth do you get them to like that?! We feed loads all evening from about 6-10... Hmm ok, there is no system or routine here, principally because of my ongoing paranoia about weight gain.

(What a bizarro post--- not enough sleep!)

Hello Kath sorry the birth was awful. BTW PJen how's your LO after coming along a bit early?

Hello to all the new ladies!

We do a dreamfeed too (actually did not know it was a baby whisperer thing, was one of the many useful things I learned from MN when DS was little!). It takes a lot longer than a normal feed because she stops and starts, but she does eventually get a decent feed in between 11 and 12 p.m. I usually stay up to do it because it's not as bad as having to get back up after you've gone to bed IMO! She then normally goes through til 3/4 and then wakes up at 6 but doesn't seem to need feeding until 7/8 ish.

Todays' weigh-in (DD, not me!): 9lb exactly! So still following her 2nd centile line nicely. Can't believe some babies are born at this weight and she is 9 weeks old though!!

todays weigh in for her ladyship was 9lb 4oz, I would not wish to give birth to a baby this size!

KathMCB welcome, of course you can join us, the more the merrier, sorry about the traumatic birth, I had one with DD1 and it's not nice.

Dilly DD1 hated sleeping on her back, we put it down to her horrible entry into the world and took her to a cranial osteopath (prob spelt wrong) nit sure how much it helped really but I was very glad when she learnt to roll and could sleep on her tummy!

Hello Ladies,

Just checking in and catching up! Dont have any time to get on here these days as i generally dont put LO down all morning due to some wind issues were having at the moment!

The last 3 weeks have been very very hard to be honest and iv even been worried about PND but havent yet had the guts to mention it to my health visitor in fear they will just label me depressed and shove pills down me! Just feel at times like i cant cope, she cries for hours every day cos of wind and like i said most mornings i cant put her down until 12/1pm, today it wasnt until 2pm that she finally settled and went to sleep and then shes kicked off the crying again tonite around 8pm, and still as yet not settled her. im so exhausted with my 2yr old to contend with aswell, i supose it could be just lack of sleep making me feel teary all of the time. Thank god ive had my mum over most days to help with my DS1!

Sorry for the sob story, feels better to get it off my chest actually! DD2 is 3 weeks old now and im having trouble with the tanking up method as its normally the evenings when the colic crying kicks in and she wont eat properly without fidgeting and crying every few sucks so like tonight, she ate the 7pm feed but missed the 9pm one as she wouldnt eat it so now shes having her 'dream feed' which isnt really a dream feed tonite as she hasnt actually slept yet! im guessing she will be up at 1 or 2am, then 5am and then 7 or 8am. then my DS1 is up at 8 once she finally settles into a deep sleep!

Glad to hear everyone is getting on better than me! My halloween baby is certainly making us work hard! :)

Hi Yummy... Sorry you're having such a hard time :(

You should mention the PND to the health visitor... Or maybe a friend? You might feel better? Im sure what you're feeling is something they can help you with... With or without pills :p

I took Tilly to baby massage after Awful wind problems and hours of crying (and arguing with DH, sleepless nights etc!) and I really think that some of the things they taught me are helping.. She doesn't scream as much, takes bottles easier and eats more... And sleeps more!! Maybe you could try it? I don't know what area you're in but the place I went was great and they do private classes at home?

In any case... My friends baby is 13 weeks and has started bringing up his own wind.. I don't know if that's normal but it does mean there's a light at the end of the tunnel!

Welcome to all the newbies! Xx

Thanks anythingwithagiraffeonit my health visitor mentioned baby massage classes but the theyr quite pricey so we have been on the net and found out a few tricks to try which my partner does when changing her for bed, i tend to do the 'bicycle legs' thing on her as she loves it and goes super quiet for a good 5 or 10 minutes whilst you do it so it must be helping her.
Things just seem to be getting gradually worse each week,a total of 8hrs she was crying (not constantly but couldnt put her down or shed cry if you get me)yesterday and she didnt really entertain her 7am bottle thismorning just cried and fidgeted as if it was hurting then went back to sleep.

The good news - we had 4.5hrs sleep last nite once i finally got her down after midnight. i really needed that chunk of sleep and felt much better for it!

Hows everyone adjusting to motherhood?xx

Hi all, Not had time to post much but do lurk!

Notice some of you are having the same 'demand' feeding issues thatI was having. My Health Visitor said that the 'routine' my LO was in wasn't sustainable and to try to get her to take a bit more at each feed.

She explained that the key to this was to work out where she had her biggest break between feeds (for us it was after her afternoon nap) as she should be really hungry and ready to take a bit more.

To encourage her to take more I have been trying to stop her falling asleep by blowing on her face and tickling her feet.

Then when she is looking for a feed I have been building up the time - it does mean distracting her when she is hungry but it's only for 5-10 mins.

This has really worked for us and I think I may hug my HV on thurs for the advice as Charlotte is much more content and I have been able to eat, rest and get things done round the house.

I know that it won't suit everyone, but I thought I should share the info thathas been a godsend to me.

xxx

Hi all, sorry you're feeling so rubbish Yummy you must be utterly exhausted. Liking your advice mummybeth. If it's any help our GP said rather than Infacol, give Tobes Calpol if he seems uncomfy with wind. Saw the HV today and liked her better - she said it's fine to let Toby sleep as long as he can at night, no need to wake at 3 or 4 hrs for a feed - thank heavens!!!! He has gained 6 oz since last week, now 7lb14 - I'm thrilled. Yummy how are you on dummies? Would it help with wind? Re PND... I think it's very much up to you if you want to tell the HV/take the pills, but listen, surely it's normal to feel shite when your baby cries a lot and you're exhausted and you feel like you can't soothe her so... have you talked to your Mum about it? Would that be a start? Remember the MN maxim 'This too shall pass'!!!

Liking the dreamfeed at 11/12pm - Toby doesn't go to sleep for the night until after that feed...he's awake from 5 or 6pm all through - I know that's not sustainable...

Thanks Hevster! I hope he'll get better at sleeping alone, I have high hopes of grobags when he's big enough.

p.s. I have ordered the Baby Whisperer book... hoping for all the answers there!

Hi all.

Yummy sorry you're having a hard time. I have been there with PND (last time round), it's shit. As others have said you don't have to do anything you don't want to but for me, asking for help from the GP (and taking the pills!) was the right thing and it's a shame I waited so long to do it - just my experience though. Also very much know how you feel re the not being able to put them down!

Dilly the minimum weight on sleeping bags varies from brand to brand, some of them are from 7lb7oz; also the weight is just an indicator and the point is that the bag needs to be snug enough around the shoulders/neck/arms so the baby can't slip down inside the bag / it can't ride up over their heads. FWIW I have been using them with DD since she hit about 7lb and just made sure the style gave a tight fit (different styles fit quite differently).

DS asleep in bed, DD asleep in her sling, am off to make dinner now!

we are grobag tastic here. Had got swaddling blankets as DD1 just had to be swaddled on the rare occassions that she slept and what do you know DD2 hates being swaddled and has been in grobags since day 2. If you get the grobag company ones some of them have poppers under the arms that means they can be used for smaller babies

liking the PH for the Royal Wedding

hope you all get some kip tonight, I was up 7 times last night and all for DD1

Can someone explain to me about grobags...

I've glanced at them but never really considered them...

Are they special in some way? :p

Btw... Having the day from Hell with Tilly!!! She has not slept pretty much since her 12 o clock feed, and the one time she dropped off a delivery person literally hammered on the door (with a package for the neighbours I might add!!) and made the dogs go loopy, waking her up! I'm hoping my 11 hours of rocking her will perform some sort of miracle for a long sleep tonight!

Yummy... I did a baby massage class in Epsom for £12.50... What area are you in?

Xx

anything... do u mean what's special about grobags specifically as opposed to other brands of baby sleeping bags, or about baby sleeping bags in general?

If the latter, sleeping bags are great as they can't be kicked off unlike blankets so keep your baby warm and hopefully more likely to stay asleep. Plus they can stay in them for night feeds so they stay nice and cosy (you can just unzip/un-popper them down the sides for nappy changes if necessary) and you don't have to faff around tucking them back in their blankets when you put them back down, etc. Also since (if they fit properly) they can't ride up over babies' faces, they are considered safer than blankets. You can get different tog ratings (same as with duvets) for different seasons - 2.5 tog is the one to get for winter.

Grobags are the original and supposedly best (and most expensive!) brand of sleeping bag, but you can get other brands e.g. Mothercare, John Lewis, and most big supermarkets, do their own versions.