Friendships and Trump

[YourBrickTiger]

Hi, just writing this out of sadness mostly, not looking to apportion blame. I'm very close to being cut off by a very close friend due to our different politic beliefs, which up until now through 10 years of friendship we have just left in the background. I had posted something about Renee Good and how I felt what had happened to her was murder. My friend who saw it sent me a video of a different viewpoint - from ICE's viewpoint. Unfortunately I misinterpreted it that she wanted to have a conversation about it, as all she said was 'you may want to watch this'. I said that I thought we were heading for a world war and that Trump was responsible. I said I didn't understand how a Christian (which she is) could justify the murder but think that what Charlie Kirk preached was ok.

FYI I'm Irish and she is from Texas and a republican. I have stayed with her before and we have always been there for each other. I thought it was just a debate but I woke up this morning to a long email from her outlining how hurt she is at what I said. I would never hurt her I just hate what is happening out there and I believe Trump is dangerous.

Has anyone else had this experience? I have told her how much she means to me and that I am sorry I crossed a line.

My son lives out there and there is a certain amount of “fear” because social media sites are trawled for ant-Trump remarks. It’s very different over here - if we disagree with the government we can say so openly. 🤷‍♀️

I rarely post much political to my son. We chat on the phone, and he’s anti Trump, but the last thing any of us need is for him to be deported back here. He’s got a wife and family over there.

I understand In America they have different laws but there is nothing in the law enforcement handbook that says it's ok to shoot a person fleeing an arrest be it on foot or behind the wheel. In fact it says discharging a fire arm not allowed unless you believe you are in danger.

They can spin it all they like, but if you watch the entire video the officer was not at any point in front of the car and the car drove off at which point a officer at the side of the car opened fire at the driver through the window. So we will see if the officer will face charges because I believe he's gone into hiding.

The problem in America is those that support Trump are like religious fanatics who will follow him regardless of the consequences.

Very true and they have the audacity to criticise the UK for freedom of speech. I'll be glad when that fat orange man is no longer a problem....I believe his days are numbered as even the republican party is starting to split.

Trump should be deported to one of smaller, less comfortable moons of Saturn.

What do you think will happen though? Will he be told to stand down?

He will be arrested along with the whole crooked bunch. America needs to wake up fast...and I mean wake up. Because they are being led down a road to dictatorship. If they keep letting a government circumvent congress then eventually there won't be a congress left. The longer this goes on the more those In power will fear losing it, because the moment they do all the laws that have been broken will be in plain sight....then it's prison.

Friendship circles have been shrinking since around 2016, which is when a lot of political and social rot was exposed, you could see the cogs of the machine, so to speak. So it's not surprising friendships are still deteriorating. I think it's petty in the extreme. We never used to judge each other by how we voted in the last election, you just voted and that was it. Now you're judged all the time. We desperately need to go back to basics.

I need my crazy cat lady's to come out. The thought of JD Vance taking over has me sharpening my claws.

I don't think Trump is a massive problem. I do notice, though, that whatever the British government does on the international front is in some way to stick it to Trump. It's like everything Trump does is the perfect excuse to hate him. We're sending in boats to intercept American vessels heading to Greenland, while we're somehow incapable/unwilling to turn the small boats back (the ones turning up on the Kent coast). We're so busy throwing shade on a sitting POTUS that we don't really care about the many, many problems we have here in Britain. Distractions and misdirections all over the place that we've mostly given up on our own country.

She’s in a cult. This is no longer about different political opinions. We all know something is changing here and we have seen it before but only though history. We’ve all learned it. The signs are here

Having had time to reflect on it, sadly (I am very sad about it) I think you're right. I just don't know what will have to happen in order for her to realise. Even if WW3 started, the MAGAs could likely justify it.

She sent you a video she must have known is stirring up controversy. I’m afraid she cares more about unpleasant political rows than her friendship with you.

I think Renee Good suffered a particularly stupid manslaughter, made pretty much inevitable by handing guns to lightly trained state officers - walking in front of a running car on an icy street was a particularly Darwinian thing to do - and giving them a quota of arrests to achieve. But I won’t be on the jury if Ross is ever charged, and neither will either of you.

She is no longer thinking ‘who are my friends’ she is thinking ‘who is with me’. And she’s happy to hurt you in pursuit of her tribe. I’m afraid if she was nice, she’s no longer acting in a nice or friendly way. I would tell her you’d be happy to talk when she can think more rationally.

there is a video of Trump back in 2017? Not sure but a while before Covid and he said’ I could shoot someone in the face and my supporters would still stand by me. He also said his supporters were dumb. I’m not saying all are but he was the one who said it

There is a difference between a republican/Tory/ etc and it’s now MAGA. They remind me so much of certain groups of people in history.

there is a clip in the film ‘The Downfall’ where a Nazi said ‘he is the furher’ basically meaning we just support him no matter how wrong or bad stuff he is.
i don’t know how strongly she is MAGA but if you’re questioning it, then you know best.

I do know what you describe isn’t just a different political belief, not anymore.

She said she doesn't feel safe wearing her Maga hat in certain areas. And the most hurtful part was that she said we have a superficial friendship separated by an ocean. Up until Renee's death we were best friends.

Sorry OP, but your (now former) friend has been radicalized and you're better off not making further attempt to salvage this particular relationship.

Yes I have had someone I thought was a friend cut me off for opposing views although that was on the topic of men thinking they are women.

We had been out of contact for a while and then after getting in contact I sent her a fb friend request which she accepted.

She must have scrolled back through my old posts to see what I had been up to and amongst the bulk of my stuff which is mostly just personal or supporting animal charities there are a few reposts about protecting women's rights on this issue.

I had no idea she had strong opposing views to me. I have plenty of friends whose politics don't align with mine and that's fine. We talk about it or don't talk about but either way we are friends because of what unites us not what divides us.

This person just cut me off and blocked me, apparently decided I am an evil bigot which I found extremely hurtful given she knows me to be the very opposite.

On reflection I felt a little better, realising that if she can't agree to disagree we were never really friends at all.

Sounds like you’re well rid.

There’s a reason why they say never discuss religion or politics, people have strong views about both and it almost never ends well if those views are opposed.

But all the talk of you putting her life in danger and her not feeling safe, she sounds unhinged and I would have distanced anyway.

TBH the response to Charly Kirk was utterly batshit. Even on here and from posters who normally would be totally anti everything he stood for.

The man was a vile individual, but someone put a bullet in him and suddenly he became a Hero, and anyone who dared question all the things he stood for was shot down in flames. Couldn’t get my head round it personally.

As sad as it was that he was shot and as much as the killer should be brought to justice, it didn’t change who he was or what he stood for.

If someone did away with Trump or Putin in the same manner would their previous conduct be swept away in the same way?

Why is it okay for her to post what she wants but not for you to do the same? I wouldn’t care if she wrote off the friendship, in fact I’d do it first. You are being far too hard on yourself here. Is she sitting fretting about the friendship or how you’re feeling? Doubt it.

what you said was very targeted at her personally, her faith and her beliefs, saying you don’t understand how a Christian can ….

a debate is totally different to a personal attack.

The delusional whining that you can’t wear a MAGA hat in some areas !

Hats can be take off - bit harder when it’s the colour of your skin that makes you a target for anything from dirty looks to violent abduction.

It’s very hard to respond to this stuff with respect for opposing views when the views are so self-serving and lacking in basic human decency. And so … thin in terms of critical analysts. Why are the right wing so thick? Not the populists, who have animal cunning - the followers.

I have friends who are americans who thought that the UK would riot when Rishi Sunak became prime minister because he’s Indian and something something colonialism meaning that your average brit is actually fundamentally extremely racist. These are very intelligent people and they read the UK completely wrong (they have visited the UK by the way, even have family living in the UK).

After that I kind of just listen when people are talking about their own countries. I wouldn’t say I always agree with them but I tend to think a lot of the time we miss a bunch of stuff when we are talking about other cultures, the politics of other countries etc etc. I would ask questions but never try to school someone on whats going on. Seeing it a lot with Iranians being talked down to right now, happened with the Venezuelans. I think it’s better sometimes to ask probing questions rather than be like “HA! LOOK AT THIS!”.

Can you just say to your friend that you value her friendship and you don’t want to fall out over this.

So it sounds like you are tying yourself in knots to try and see your friends viewpoint and she point blank refuses to see yours. You know in you heart that some of her beliefs are wrong but somehow you want to convince yourself that you might be wrong I order to maintain the friendship because she is so lovely? I don't think she sounds lovely she sounds absolutely brainwashed and pig headed and I don't think I could be friends with someone like that who was so polarised from my thinking. You sound utterly devastated by her potential rejection, are you a people pleaser normally?

She sounds bloody awful to be honest, captured by dodgy view points. There’s too much to smooth out to maintain a friendship.

@YourBrickTiger , please stop grovelling like this is all your fault. She is the one who sent you the message, it is entirely unreasonable to send something that you position as being to start a debate then doing a mike drop and sticking your fingers in your ears and throwing a tantrum when the other person wants to talk about it- it’s what the tangerine moron does and its idiotic petulant and dangerous.
Im sorry if you lose a friend, but tbh she sounds like a nutter so nothing lost really. What happened to Renee Good was murder, and ICE is a secret police force that is trying to oppress the American people through fear and violence- anyone who says otherwise has nefarious motives or is willfully blind/ an idiot. The US president ( not saying his name) is the most dangerous person alive at the moment and I fear what is coming, we are seriously looking a WW3 and I would feel sorry for the US if they hadn’t allowed this to happen.

But she’s doing the same to me? And that’s ok?