School asking daughter to remove small cross despite religious symbols policy

[FanFckingTastic]

I'm looking for some advice and thoughts!

DD is 15 and at secondary school. She has always worn a small silver cross - at primary school this was never an issue (it was a church school) Up until this point it's not been an issue at secondary school either. The cross is very small and is tucked into her shirt so you would have to be really looking for it in order to see it. She always removes it for PE etc.

Last Monday her head of year saw the cross and asked her to remove it. My daughter replied that it was her cross, and that she didn't want to. She was then approached and asked to remove it every day for the remainder of the week, with increasing threats of sanctions if she didn't comply with the schools 'no jewelry' rule. My daughter kept reiterating that this was her cross, and asked the teacher to speak with me. Finally on Friday I received an email to tell me that my daughter needed to take her cross off.

I completely understand the new jewelry rule but wonder how this sits alongside the responsibility that the school has under the equalities act 2010. In their uniform policy it states that it will 'allow pupils to wear headscarves and other religious or cultural symbols' I would interpret this to include a cross too?

My daughter wears her cross as a sign of her faith and really wants to continue to do this.

Has anyone come across this situation before? If so, what was the solution?

Well they can f right off with that.

To be fair though I'd never send my kid to a school that told them what they could and couldn't wear though (within reason). I guess that's most schools these days.

I refuse to work strict uniform jobs as an adult and I think children should have the same right. Very important children aren't brought up thinking they have to conform to the system.

You can see further down the thread another PP mentioned two cases, this one and one concerning a flight attendant. Cross could carry bacteria and be a health and safety issue in the case of the nurse so she lost, but not in the case of the flight attendant so they won. OP has said DD takes it off for PE so it looks like health and safety isn’t the issue.

Neither are compulsory but they’re also not the same. Hijab is a way of observing faith - telling God ‘I am following you’ while a cross is a symbol of faith. It’s telling others ‘I am Christian’.

Declaring your faith to others is a really important part of Christian practice. Sticking neck out is a big deal. (See Peter who denied Christ three times the night before he was murdered.)

Having said that, cross keyring does the trick with silly jewellery rules.

I believe @CurlewKate was being sarcastic. There's been a lot of chatter about how we're going to become an Islamic state online. Dunno how, as atheists outweigh all religions, so I can't see it happening any time soon.

She could pin it to the inside of her bra, blouse, skirt, anywhere that doesn't show. I'm Catholic but don't wear a crucifix or anything that shows my faith.

Its not compulsory for Muslims or unmarried Jewish girls/women to wear a headscarf either.
Its a cultural thing aligned to faith but not compulsory

And if OPs daughter is wearing it because its significant to her faith, Id raise that with the school with a note from a priest or vicar from her parish where she observes and ask the school to consider it in line with their other religious exceptions to policy.

You could write to the school and say that she will remove her cross when all other students remove headscarves, stars of David etc.

She doesn't have to wear one but I don’t have any issue with her doing so. It’s doesnt flout the rules and if other religious cultural items are allowed it has to be treated the same.

Tell them they'll just have to expell her then but if they do you'll tale them to court for religious prejudice and drag their name through the mud that it clearly belongs in.

Don't miss and hit the wall.

Don’t be afraid of being ‘that parent’. Polite but firm gets you better results than being a pushover. What they are asking is not reasonable so don’t be afraid to tell them that.

Government guidance on uniform policy states:

“Pupils have the right to manifest a religion or belief, but not necessarily at all times or places, or in a particular manner.

Where a school has good reason for restricting an individual’s freedoms – for example, the promotion of cohesion and good order in the school, or genuine health and safety or security considerations – the restriction of an individual’s rights to manifest their religion or belief may be justified.”
www.gov.uk/government/publications/school-uniform/school-uniforms#human-rights-equality-and-discrimination-considerations

OP’s daughter is manifesting her faith - and the Council of Europe agreed 20 years ago that a small cross work around the neck is a normal manifestation of Christian faith, see link up thread - this is also guidance [for employers] implemented by the EHRC and UK government - so if the school are restricting this, they are most likely legally in the wrong.

☝️absolutely this. If the school gives you trouble, escalate to the Govenors and then if no joy, a solicitors letter.
If they allow other expressions of faith, it’s overt discrimination.
This is a bill I would die on!

It is NOT compulsory to Muslims to wear headscarves.

I'd buy her a bigger cross.

https://www.theguardian.com/education/2008/jul/30/schools.religion

I'm surprised at that, in light of this article. Sorry if already shared.

Michaela School - often in the news as particularly strict and where pupils were forbidden to pray at lunchtime because it was divisive to the school community - wouldn't allow it according to their policy. No jewellery allowed, and the uniform policy particularly says:

"Pupils must not wear or carry any items – including badges, accessories, drawings, or other possessions – that display symbols representing national, religious, racial, sexual, or political identities that are not inclusive of the entire school community. This includes anything that may be seen to express allegiance to a particular group that does not include all pupils. Such items risk creating division and are therefore not permitted."

No jewellery means no jewellery, period.
Even if DD had a long chain which would place the cross deep inside her clothing, you would still see a chain around her neck, presuming she doesn't always wear high necked shirts.

Your DD is flouting the no jewelry rule.
As others have suggested, your DD could carry a small cross in her bag if she needed to see a material sign of her Christianity whilst at school.

Christians the world over carry God in their hearts and a prayer in their minds and I know many devout Christians that have never felt the need to have, or wear a piece of jewelry with a cross on it, as they don't need to publicly display their faith.
The school has ruled out the wearing of jewelry for a reason.

Sorry, but head coverings are not compulsory either, unless in Iran or Afghanistan and such. And we are repeatedly told that women wear head coverings because they want to, so your point is moot.

Muslims aren’t required to wear head coverings!

Why doesnt she speak to her vicar/priest/youth pastor and ask them for advice? As a regular church goer and devout Christian surely that would be the first thing you do?

Well a brooch is jewelry so no, not ok. How a out a sticker on her pencil case or badge on her bag?

It is verging on superstition for a baptised Christian to need an outward and visible token other than the witness of her own life. Christ is peace. He does not bring division except on issues like love for the neighbour and care of the least.

Other religions have different understandings of embodiment, and are not comparable.

ETA different if you have a formally vowed or promised consecrated life and are representing a religious order or office in the church.

Gosh-something I approve of at Michaela School!

All or nothing.

Seems fair, if that really applies to everyone.

Maybe she is genuinely feeling called to more, and could do with spiritual guidance about how to live that.

I don't know how parents do it. It was bad enough being a kid having to go. Now they even control you as a parent through your own kid.

I'd probably take her out and go travelling with her haha. See the world, adventure, read books in ancient libraries... like, sod all this government institutionalised crap. I guess that would require plenty of money though.

Oh do give over 🙄

As a Christian who also works in a CofE school, this is nonsense. In our school jewellery is not allowed for any child. We have children of all faiths and of none; some of whom wear hijabs etc.

This attitude is divisive and certainly not Christian.

OP I would give your daughter a ‘cross in my pocket’ which is fabric and often contains a prayer. My ds always had one in his pocket at school.