Trying to be a Christian... any tips?

[HeroicMinute]

I've just started listening to the Hallowed app. The first thing I've come across is a Routines course, which is great for me as I am horrendous time waster, which probably explains why I haven't spiritually evolved.
I was raised loosely Christian and attended the village church as a child. I think I want to replicate this traditional experience, but with some slightly more intellectual content.
I've been thinking about Christianity for a few years, and have tried a few different churches, but nothing's stuck.
My reasons for not sticking at a church:
-I can't handle a church band, it all seems very nice and worshipful but it makes me cringe a bit. I love a choir.
-I am very opposed to modern identity politics and didn't go back when a vicar started talking about structural racism in the church.
-I stopped going to an evangelical church because the curate was sweet and excited about his Christianity but did lengthy sermons suitable for children with no analysis or intellectual stimulation.
-found a curate at another church a bit creepy.
-found the sermon in a big popular church on 8th October to be a bit antisemitic.

You get the picture; I'm a bit of a PITA and I'm obviously putting up barriers. Don't get me wrong; I'm not a particularly intellectual person but I am curious and I sincerely want to be a Christian. I don't yet believe properly, sometimes I do, well I suppose I usually do, but with varying levels of conviction.
Any tips would be very gratefully received.
Thank you in advance.

@LeaningOnTheEverlastingArms, indeed.

Ah that old chestnut- don’t follow anyone else- just follow me!🤣

id save your sympathy for people following a cult leader who struggle to understand their own holy book.

Yes I watched those clips, seems the usual twaddle that actually comes from the Catholic Church - best ignored.. I don’t think the Catholic Church are in a position to judge anyone -even Paul.

interested why you call the programme “ terrifying”

I was taught by scholars how to read the Bible..Franciscan nuns taught me how to read generally

Jesus was a Jew. He would most likely speak through his own people. I suspect he would probably look at most Christian’s and think they haven’t listened to anything I’ve said, get some popcorn and watch The Life of Brian and think “ that’s more like it”.

interested why you call the programme “ terrifying

@Kdtym10, it's the lack of forgiveness mentioned. Who would actually be able to get through that gate without it? Who would be able to get through that gate by their own efforts?

"26 Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” (Matthew 18:26)

If the church has a gate like that (rather than heaven) how do people hear about God? I suppose we look to the above quote above. Hence I said 'quite terrifying'...

You never answered my question, would you excommunicate Paul?

Jesus was a Jew. He would most likely speak through his own people.

@Kdtym10

Jesus was also God. We are all His people.

Correction: Jesus is also God. We are all His people.

I was taught by scholars how to read the Bible..Franciscan nuns taught me how to read generally

@Kdtym10 there is a certain kind of irony in that fact...

Have you cast off that particular burden yet?

Well it’s open to debate whether Jesus was any more God than you or I.

On any case the Jews are God’s chosen people for this purpose or do you not believe the Bible.

“For you [Israel] are a people holy to the Lord your God. The Lord your God has chosen you out of all the peoples on the face of the earth to be his people, his treasured possession” (Deuteronomy 7:6).

”And who is like your people Israel—the one nation on earth that God went out to redeem as a people for himself… by driving out nations and their gods from before your people, whom you redeemed from Egypt? You have established your people Israel as your very own forever, and you, Yahweh, have become their God” (2 Samuel 7:23-24).

This is why Jesus was a Jew, in the holy land - because these are Gods chosen people. If God wanted someone else that’s probably where he would have sent Jesus.

Not sure what’s ironic. And I’m certainly not aware of any burden. The nuns were great teachers, and indeed very good at maths you’ll be glad to know. We all left that school way ahead of expectations. It was a lovely school. I’m sad no nuns teach there any more and the convent has been sold, it had a lovely chapel.

Well, I wouldn’t excommunicate Paul because I wouldn’t be part of a religion that had such a concept. You’ll have to ask a Catholic.

Well it’s most likely that the comment you’re referring to (I assume you meant chapter 19 not 18) is a tricky one. Unfortunately the hate reference is most likely false, as is the concept of a play on words to mean a rope going through the eye of a needle. This is both due to dating issues.

What this most likely references is the contemporary Babylonian/messopatomian/assyrian saying “an elephant through the eye of a needle” meaning impossible. Indeed that is also what verse 26 is alluding to.

so what that chapter says is even is things are impossible to man or the lower self god (and you can use either the separate supreme being or the higher self) can make possible. Therefore, by definition if God wanted someone to hear his Word then then would, man (including the church) couldn’t get in the way. Or do you not believe God is omnipotent?

@Kdtym10

If God wanted someone else that’s probably where he would have sent Jesus.

And He has!😊

Not sure what’s ironic. And I’m certainly not aware of any burden. The nuns were great teachers, and indeed very good at maths you’ll be glad to know. We all left that school way ahead of expectations. It was a lovely school. I’m sad no nuns teach there any more and the convent has been sold, it had a lovely chapel.

Oh you are a puzzle!! You don't seem to like the Catholic Church very much but went to a 'lovely' Catholic school and felt the nuns were great teachers. You are 'sad' no nuns teach there anymore and thought the chapel there was women. Yet you reject (orthodox) Christian teaching particularly rejecting pretty much all of what Paul wrote.

Incidentally the fact that nuns teach would seem to support my interpretation of what Paul was talking about with regards to women teaching. That is his issue was with the women trying to teach over him - disrupting his teachings that is being disrespectful. It was probably said in a '..what qualifies you to judge?' kind of way.

And what does qualify you to judge?

Gate reference - not hate reference

Therefore, by definition if God wanted someone to hear his Word then then would, man (including the church) couldn’t get in the way

@Kdtym10,
indeed, as I was saying. Was that not clear? So we do appear to agree on something.

I assume you meant chapter 19 not 18
Yes, sorry, my mistake.

"chapel there was women"

Was 'lovely'. Bit of a slip up there!🤦‍♀️

What qualifies Paul to put down women who challenge him? The fact he’s a man? Why did he take such offence? Why did he think he was beyond reproach? The man was an egotistical misogynist. He shows almost every indicator of being a cult leader. He embodies everything Jesus was against.

Well I suppose women teaching (ie the nuns) is directly sticking two fingers up at Paul’s “women shouldn’t teach” bollocks. The nuns were great no nonsense women - I’d probably have a lot less issues with the Catholic Church if it was run by nuns😀. I can appreciate nice places in all manner of settings-the chapel was a lovely cool and quiet place. And yes one of the nuns was a kick ass maths teacher!

So I’m not sure why you find that biblically inaccurate clip terrifying as it’s a load of crap on almost every level from the acting to any biblical reference

Well, I wouldn’t excommunicate Paul because I wouldn’t be part of a religion that had such a concept.

@Kdtym10, but you wouldn't listen to his teachings either.

On observation you do seem to be very concerned with (outward) authority issues, which of us teaches, which of us learns, who is in charge etc. It can be an issue we don't have faith in the truth no person can keep us from God. But once we recognise that, does it not free us to learn from Paul's writings without hindrance?

So I’m not sure why you find that biblically inaccurate clip terrifying as it’s a load of crap on almost every level from the acting to any biblical reference

@Kdtym10

I said quite terrifying. And that's because some people might believe that sort of thing and give up in their shame. It's just I would feel sorry for them, although God can reach them. Like we want to help people suffering immediately even though their suffering is temporary.

I have no issue with deserved authority, I have an issue with dangerous authority. Where self appointed cult leaders tell anyone, especially women, to shut up if they are challenged- that is weak. And therefore dangerous leadership.

. And yes one of the nuns was a kick ass maths teacher!

@Kdtym10, ok. No need to rub it in!😂

I find quite abit about organised religion terrifying

Maybe the Holy Spirit should have put you in touch)🤣

I notice the Apostle Paul isn’t appreciated much by some on this thread. But if you’re going to disregard Paul then you need to disregard the Apostle Peter too, and the Apostle James.. and the Apostle John… 🤔