Emilysquest
" can be a rather unfocused person (often jumping about from one thing to another and multi-tasking all day) and this is something I want to get into check as it causes me stress. My DS (who is autistic) always says to me "one thing at a time Mum" when I am making too many requests of him, I need to learn to say this to myself!"
I understand both the unfocus and the Autistic one thing at a time. Ds and I have learnt to come to an arrangement and it has got easier for the middle ground to be found. He has learnt to accept that when I do things from me it is going to seem unfocused and jumping, and I have learnt to give a synopsis (the big picture) and then one thing at a time. I do jump about a lot and when i am working in the house I am working everywhere which drives everyone else crazy. But they have come to learn that if you let me work like this I am actually far more productive then if you try to get me to focus on one area. For me this is because if i try to focus on one area then my brain becomes bogged down with all the thoughts of what else needs to be done and I get stuck and just can see what to do in the area I am working.
What I have learnt to do if train myself to focus when focus is needed. And for that there are 2 situations - it is something that I am naturally drawn to focus on (and usually worm hole into losing more hours then is sensible) or it is something I know i need to focus on and then I have routines that I use. Like lighting a candle, putting music on, sitting in a specific place, and giving myself a "reward" for after. 9 times out of ten that reward is "squirrel time".
I have had to learn to embrace what others would see as a disadvantage as they are actually just part of me that allow me to properly function. the Key is the balance. and systems, and timers, and a few other things to help keep everything on track
Mostly no one can figure out how i get so much done for someone who has chronic illnesses that can lay me flat in bed for days on end in a rough patch. Learning to pace has been the hardest.
And with that ramble I mean to say sometimes we have to embrace who we are to move forwards, because trying to change that isn't always productive and helpful. Compromise may work. But be kind to yourself. And I ask you this. Why is your all over the place causing you stress, is it stopping you from getting things done, does it make you feel like you are less productive, or do you feel that you shouldn't be all over the place. It is not a question I need the answer to, but might help you one your journey to resolve it. As much as many of us were worn down by the why phase, why can be a very illuminating question. Why does that make me feel like that, why did those plants die when the others survived, why on earth did i decide now was a good time to sign up for that.
Forgive me I have hit the deadline met, focus down, brain run free should probably sleep phase. Hopefully I am making sense (but this is a good example as to how i end up with pages of chicken scratch)
I wish you luck in your journey for focus.