Salaam dear crescent. I have read your response a few times, and I can relate and understand every single thing you said. I've said this before but you speak such wise words.
Yes you're quite right, if any sister were in the situation I'd tell them to LTB run for the hills. I feel like this isn't my life, it feels like I'm looking in on someone else and this isn't me. I'm actually a very strong willed person, in my life before islam I didn't take any shit from anyone and always stood my ground. I was quite feisty. So this doesn't feel like me. I'm not a walkover. To the outside world I wear the trousers. But behind closed doors it's a different story, I do stand my ground when he says things that are so outrageous it's laughable. But I try to just ignore as I don't want him throwing things back in my face by saying I'm argumentative. Don't get me wrong, I don't cower in the corner, I'm not scared of him and 90% of the time our relationship is 'normal'.
Cooking wise, we probably eat at my in laws just as much as we eat at home. He has a big breakfast there every morning. So I don't know why he had that outburst, which he's had before, when there's always food readily available at his mums. They don't mind us eating there, I just offer to make something every now and then and take it round for them.
His family call him Jekyll and Hyde. I couldn't agree more.
I actually asked him to leave yesterday. I can't deal with what he's done any longer, it's hurting too much and I don't want it to effect my children. We had a long chat, he wouldn't accept it's over. He still doesn't. He's still here acting like everything is ok, being extra nice to us all. Typical abusive behaviour I believe.
We need to stay in the town we're living in really. My eldest is settled at school. My mum, brother & sister all live minutes away, as do my inlaws. I'm very close with my siblings and their children, I see them all at least twice a week. I do keep thinking about moving away, but I fear our problems will just follow us wherever we go.
I've referred my H time and time again to the Quran where it states about money. For some reason he seems to think he's exempt 
. I'm fighting a losing battle. He has no fear of God, this is the problem. All of his friends work extremely hard and provide for their families, they all have savings, nice houses and nice cars. We have nothing. A car, yes. Our own house, no. Savings, not a penny.
The game playing seems to have ceased for now, it comes and goes. I think his mum told him to get round to mine and help me out or she'd stop cooking his breakfast!
I can't reply to everything you've written, I'm on my phone feeding my beautiful boy in bed. But I have read it all, and thank you again for taking the time to reply to me.
Marshallah you're brother sounds wonderful. It's reassuring knowing people can change.
Yummy I'd love to give you advice but all the other sisters have said it all. Also I don't think I'm in any position to tell you what I think you should do, given my own situation!
That news story is reassuring to read after all the negative press recently. I like like it!