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Original poster

my dog has just bitten my little girl

102 replies

heartsore · 18/02/2010 13:49

and i am going to have to put him to sleep now and i am feeling horrific. i feel terrible that i let my daughter get bitten (by keeping my dog whom i love even though i know he isnt safe with kids) and that i am going to have to say goodbye to my dog.

am just grateful that he didnt get her face but her hand.

oh god, i cant talk about this in RL with anyone because they will all just tell me its my own fault and i know it is, but that doesnt mean im not going to miss my dog.

and my poor DD, god, i feel awful

sorry this is a bit scrambled i am just so so upset.

OP posts:

GhoulsAreLoud · 18/02/2010 13:51

I'm very sorry for you.

I'm not sure that this is the best place to post about you keeping a dog you knew wasn't safe with kids. You might want to rethink this thread before you get flamed.

ShinyAndNew · 18/02/2010 13:53

Wha exctly happened? Is there anyway the dog is safe to be rehomed to a childless house? Would training help?

My dog bit me not long ago and I am training him as I know it was my fault and not a sign of an aggressive/dangerous dog.

teasle · 18/02/2010 13:53

I agree.

But fwiw, i would put any dog to sleep that bit my children. Sorry...Your DD and her safety need to come first.

diddl · 18/02/2010 13:54

Could he not be rehomed somewhere without children or was it too vicious a bite iyswim.

Rhubarb · 18/02/2010 13:55

I shouldn't post. But once you have kids your priority is with them. Luckily you realise that now and you are taking action. I don't think that any dog that is considered unsafe with kids should be kept by anyone - most attacks are from dogs whose owners don't have children. But sooner or later those dogs are going to come into contact with kids.

Look, some people would have just smacked the dog and thought nothing of it - at least you can see the danger and are taking action.

Hope your dd is ok.

Rhubarb · 18/02/2010 13:58

Shiny, if your dog bit you and that was supposedly your fault, would it be your childrens fault if the dog bit them?

Children are by their nature excitable, noisy, spontaneous - all the things that set dogs off. If your dog bit you, then it is more likely to bite a child.

And I'm speaking as someone whose family kept dogs all through my childhood. I was never bitten by one of our dogs but by other peoples. I used to work with them and like to think I know dogs pretty well. I don't have a dog now and wouldn't have one either.

Original poster

heartsore · 18/02/2010 13:59

thanks for not flaming. sorry, am a bit of a first timer sort of thing.

yes, he has always had problems with being unpredictable and biting, but we have worked with him for the last 3 years and he was vastly improved and when DD was a baby he barely acknowledged her existance but now she is older and he is harder to monitor.

there was a gate between them, he actively went to bite her through it. (i have never left them unsupervised) like i said, thank god he only got her hand.

i have previously tried to rehome him, but he is huge a boxer cross ridgeback, weighs in at about 40kgs and the vet and the behaviourist both said they wouldnt feel comfortable advising me to rehome him as he could really hurt someone.

i was going to put him down when i fell pregnant with DD, because i was worried about it, but like i said he was fine for ages and ages.

anway, thanks again for not flaming, i am just very upset and i know i have to put him down and i know my daughter comes first.

OP posts:

teasle · 18/02/2010 14:02

Of course you are upset, it sounds like an awful situation to be in.

Rhubarb · 18/02/2010 14:02

Can I just ask - what made you get a dog like that in the first place? How did you control him outside?

ShinyAndNew · 18/02/2010 14:05

My children don't put the dog to bed (a place he hates) on a night, and don't accidentially make it worse for him by misreading his signals and scaring him further.

They also are never left alone with him and have been taught to respect his space as he has been trained to respect their space.

I'm so sorry about your dog op. It sounds like you jhave tried your best with him.

GhoulsAreLoud · 18/02/2010 14:05

I really feel for you. I rehomed one of my dogs the day DD came home from hospital as a newborn as I knew I couldn't trust her. She had only bitten other dogs and was rehomed quite quickly but it was very sad. It was the right thing to do though.

Original poster

heartsore · 18/02/2010 14:07

we didnt set out to get him, he was abandoned as a puppy and the lady that found him couldnt look after him so DH and i said we would take him on. it was pretty clear from early on that he was going to be difficult, but both DH and i are experienced dog owners and as we didnt have children and had the space etc etc, we took him on. and alot of his behaviours we were able to manage and he was a happy dog and we were pleased that he hadnt had to be destroyed.

but obviously weve come to the end of the road now, and i have to take comfort in that he has had a pretty good time of it with us. he has never been mistreated and always loved and that will just have to be good enough.

sorry am really crying now. i just feel so bloody awful.

and thanks, yes my DD is ok, luckily he has the useless boxer stubby teeth and not the ferocious ridgeback ones. so no skin broken but her hand is terribly bruised and swollen. her really really bit her.

OP posts:

GhoulsAreLoud · 18/02/2010 14:09

However sad you feel about your dog just count your lucky stars that your DD is ok, it sounds like it could have been far worse.

Rhubarb · 18/02/2010 14:10

Sorry for the loss of your dog. I guess some animals are just not meant to be domesticated. You did the best for your dog whilst you could.

GetOrfMoiLand · 18/02/2010 14:14

WEll, at least you realise that the dog is too dangerous.

You are very lucky indeed that your dd has not been harmed before. I think you made a mistake in thinking that such a volatile dog would be suitable to have round a small child. Thankfully the realisation has come before your dd has been bitten severely.

Hopefully you will be making arrangements to keep the dog away from your dd with immediate effect.

Yes I am sorry for you because of your closeness to the dog, however you did take a big risk with your dd's safety. Both you and your dd are fortunate that this bite was not worse.

bedlambeast · 18/02/2010 20:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Skegness · 18/02/2010 20:36

Oh sweetie. How very sad. You are definitely doing the right thing. If he went for your little girl through a gate he just can't be trusted, can he? Poor you.

Vallhala · 18/02/2010 21:04

You don't HAVE to put this dog "to sleep". There is always an alternative, always people with the skills and the experience to rescue and rehabilitate.

It will be a bugger of an uphill task but I CAN and WILL find him such a rescue place.

If you'll let me. (It's what I do, I have contact with rescues up and down the country and find places for dogs such as this who will otherwise die - references etc on me can be offered if you email me).

You and society lose nothing by doing so - we know what he's like and would find out more, as much as possible from you, and he would be in an environment where he was in contact with only adults experienced with such dogs, who would work their asses off to help and rehabilitate him.

All he needs is a chance. Please give him that, and me the opportunity to provide it for him. It breaks my heart to know of a healthy dog being killed, especially when I know that help is available out there.

I'm at alfaalfa AT live DOT co DOT uk

SilveryMoon · 18/02/2010 21:12

When my ds1 turned a year, my dog (boxer-cross) started growling at him.
The dog had been previously mistreated and the growls started sounding a bit viscious(sp?). I felt I had no choice but to get the dog out of our house. I took her to Battersea dogs home and told them about her aggressive nature (she had attacked 2 dogs and a friend of mine but tbh, that was his fault and he knows that and would admit that), anyway, they said they would have to put her down because she wouldn't be safe to be re-homed.
I was quite upset and in the end, they agreed to keep her for a few days and see how she was with the handlers and other dogs. A few weeks later I got a call from the vet asking me about some things and I was told she had been fostered out of the home until they find a family suitable for her.

I do know how sad and painful it is to even have to think about this, and I am not judging, but you and your dd were very lucky.

EdgarAllenSnow · 18/02/2010 21:17

hug<

very sad for you - and it does sound like you were doing everything 'right' and had dog gate etc etc, don't blame yourself - you seem like you've tried really hard.

if a dog is like this you cannot keep it at home with your child.

I really do believe there are some dogs that just cant be kept as pets - if your dog is one it is better to accept that.

my family once had to hand back a dog (GSD-Boxer X - not bred for any good purpose) for attacking family members - it is heartbreaking but sometimes there isn't any choice. (the NCDL told us they had him work as a security dog - though possibly they had him put down as that was his fourth failed rehoming and just told us that to make us feel better)

ItsGrimUpNorth · 18/02/2010 21:17

I am judging.

You knew this dog wasn't safe with kids.

It was only a matter of time before he bit your child.

Sorry, I have sympathy only for your child whose mother has put the dog first all this time by having him around knowing he was a risk.

abbierhodes · 18/02/2010 21:25

OP, I feel for you. We had a dog who bit a neighbour's child. Fortunately the child wasn't hurt, but we had to rehome the dog as we couldn't risk keeping her with 2 children of our own.

Until that point we knew she was boistrous, but never thought she'd actually bite.

We spent three months keeping her away from the kids whilst we tried to find a home for her. It took this long because we were adamant that she should go to a good home AND that we would be honest about the biting, so as not to risk someone else's children. I wish I'd been able to contact someone like you, Valhalla!

I think your reply was harsh, Itsgrimupnorth. Not every decision is black and white.

Vallhala · 18/02/2010 21:28

Edgar, "your dog has gone off to be a security dog" is, or at least was, an often-used euphamism for the grim reality, Im sorry to say. IME security firms worth their salt wouldn't touch such a dog. They prefer them to be bold but biddable, a biter is too impulsive and therefore too much of a liability.

(I must add here that I personally won't support a rescue which decides to rehome dogs in this way and many rescues won't allow such persons to adopt their dogs).

OurLadyOfPerpetualSupper · 18/02/2010 21:29

I always remember what a very experienced dog trainer told me: once a dog has crossed the boundary of actually biting a human, there's no going back and the only thing to do is to put it down.

My dog is a border terrier, and one reason for having such a small breed is that I know I could kick her across the room if she ever turned on one of my DCs - and I'd have no compunction in doing so.

Vallhala · 18/02/2010 21:30

Sorry, I meant euphemism.

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