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Original poster

my dog has just bitten my little girl

102 replies

heartsore · 18/02/2010 13:49

and i am going to have to put him to sleep now and i am feeling horrific. i feel terrible that i let my daughter get bitten (by keeping my dog whom i love even though i know he isnt safe with kids) and that i am going to have to say goodbye to my dog.

am just grateful that he didnt get her face but her hand.

oh god, i cant talk about this in RL with anyone because they will all just tell me its my own fault and i know it is, but that doesnt mean im not going to miss my dog.

and my poor DD, god, i feel awful

sorry this is a bit scrambled i am just so so upset.

OP posts:

ItsGrimUpNorth · 18/02/2010 21:32

Why is it harsh, abbier? The op knew the dog was not safe with children. So why would you keep such a dog if you knew that? Of course the child got bitten. Would you expect anything else? Really?

EdgarAllenSnow · 18/02/2010 21:32

that's kind of what we suspected Valhalla...

bedlambeast · 18/02/2010 21:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

abbierhodes · 18/02/2010 21:55

I just think it's harsh to post a judgy reply when the OP has already said that she is crying, and already feels bad. If she was considering keeping the dog, then I'd join you in flaming her, because sometimes people need telling. But she clearly doesn't need telling, and your comment didn't really serve a purpose other than to make her feel worse than she already does.

ItsGrimUpNorth · 18/02/2010 22:34

But she KNEW the dog was a risk to children before it bit the child. Does a dog have to bite before you get rid? I think the OP should feel bad actually. She messed up. And her dd paid for her mess.

Vallhala · 18/02/2010 22:45

ItsGrim, may I add that the person who really messed up was the bastard who abandoned that poor dog when he was a pup from the sounds of it.

Yes, the poor child has paid a price and thank god it isn't a serious one.

The dog, however, may well have already paid the price of what man did to him in his first weeks or months... with his life.

I have VERY strong no-kill views wrt this sort of situation. That's why I posted with an alternative solution and an offer to help facilitate it. I just pray to goodness that it's not too late and that heartsore will give her dog a chance.

WorzselMummage · 18/02/2010 22:56

Only a crazy person would rehome a vicious dog.

It needs to be put to sleep.

Op - Poor you, poor dd.

fruitshootsandheaves · 18/02/2010 23:06

I agree with Worzsel Mummage

there is NOT always an alternative. Some dogs are not suitable for rehoming. Whether it is their fault or not sometimes they can't be retrained.

OP sending you and your dd an unmumnetty hug.

Vallhala · 18/02/2010 23:19

Seems like I and the rescues I know who have successfully rehabilitated such dogs are crazy then.

I can live with that.

The two sides will never agree so there's no point in arguing, especially under the circumstances as it won't help heartsore.

There is an alternative. I know it can work and speak from considerable experience on this. I've offered the alternative and also offered to help, which is surely more useful than debating who is right and who is wrong on the kill vs no-kill debate.

midori1999 · 18/02/2010 23:20

"But she KNEW the dog was a risk to children before it bit the child. Does a dog have to bite before you get rid? I think the OP should feel bad actually. She messed up. And her dd paid for her mess"

Not only a child that has suffered though, is it? A dog now faces being PTS because it has been let down by humans.

Dogs do bite, and for all sorts of reasons, but there is very,very rarely no reason, even if the humans involved can't see that. That doesn't have to be a reason at the moment or time of the bite, but something in the dogs history that made it inclined to bite int he first place. In most cases it is possible to manage a dog, or rehabilitate it, so that bites do not occur.

If one of my dogs, which I had raised since a puppy, bit one of my children, I would seriously be asking myself where I had gone wrong. Yes, me, the one responsible for raising the dog.

I don't agree that all dogs can be saved, there are far too many in rescues and pounds, and not enough homes, but if Valhalla feels she can find this dog a good foster place, then I think that is certainly an option to be considered.

WorzselMummage · 18/02/2010 23:22

Very diplomatic

midori1999 · 18/02/2010 23:28

What is this 'diplomatic' you speak of?!

Vallhala · 18/02/2010 23:30

Thank you midori. WM, you've lost me too.

WorzselMummage · 18/02/2010 23:31

I was talking to vallhala about the non debate

MeMySonAndI · 18/02/2010 23:45

When can we say that a dog had its chance and used it? I think this one has had a good chance over three years living with experienced dog owners who tried as hard as they could, giving him another one is looking for trouble, big trouble.

We can't blame everything on handling, and we can't risk people to protect an aggressive dog.

He has had his chance already.

This reminds me of that Liverpool dog that killed a small child. The dog may have been poorly handled, it might have had a terrible life, the police should have intervened earlier, people should not have been allowed to have a dangerous breed, etc etc. But that does NOT matter at all, the child is dead and NOBODY could change that.

If you want to give it another chance, take dog and new owner to a desert island where the children of unsuspecting neighbours are not at risk because someone wanted to give an already proven dangerous dog, another chance

MeMySonAndI · 18/02/2010 23:47

"A dog now faces being PTS because it has been let down by humans. "

And...could humans be let down by their dogs or is it always the fault of the humans?

Vallhala · 18/02/2010 23:47

Thanks WM, now I see.

It's not a case of being diplomatic... that's a skill I'm still working on, 45 years into my life. I could rant and rave and probably pull rank here too wrt some of the misguided opinions but what's the point? Yes, I have a viewpoint, it's based on considerable experience and bloody hard work, not to mention a lot of heartache, but that's not my reason for responding to the OP.

I work for the dogs, not for the owners, any rescue or any potential adopters. I didn't offer diplomacy, I offered to help the dog.

Vallhala · 18/02/2010 23:53

ME, in all honesty, I've seen hundreds of cases where dogs have been let down by humans - not necessarily the owner at the time, not necessarily an owner at all.

Rarely, VERY rarely, have I seen it the other way round.

All I'm saying is that killing the dog achieves nothing. In a no-kill rescue he will either be rehabilitated and go to an experienced, checked and matched home after many months or more of work and much thought on the part of the rescue, not to say many meetings between adoptive owners and himself, with life-long rescue back-up and support or he will live out his natural life in a controlled, experienced rescue environment where he is no threat to the public.

Original poster

heartsore · 19/02/2010 07:48

i just wanted to say thanks so much to everyone on this thread i was in a real state yesterday and your kindness and empathy really helped.

i have emailed vallhala and just wanted to thank her publicly for offering her own time and experitse to help, that was very kind of her.

but we are going to go through with putting him down as it is the only thing to do in our situation.

thanks again all.

OP posts:

MeMySonAndI · 19/02/2010 10:56

Sorry Valhalla, with all due respect (and I feel a lot of respect for you), I still wouldn't want a "rehabilitated" dangerous dog being matched near to my house. Too much of a gamble, it may not be the dog's fault but neither the one of the unsuspecting people that end up having it around.

rainbowinthesky · 19/02/2010 11:12

Heartsore - I love dogs but I would do the same as you. It's a dog and people come first, always. .
It will feel awful to begin with but those feeligns wont last.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 19/02/2010 11:57

Heartsore - please reconsider and give Valhalla a chance with your dog. If she could get the dog taken away really soon, would you let her?

FWIW, I don't think you did wrong by keeping the dog - you were trying to balance your responsibility to the dog with your (obviously greater) responsibility for your dd, and did your best for them both, imo.

I will not judge you whatever you decide to do - all I want is for you to make a decision that is right for you and that you can live with. That is why I am suggesting you give Valhalla a chance to sort out a rescue for the dog.

morningpaper · 19/02/2010 12:02

I think all these types of dogs should be banned

I think it is insane

I think Vallhala is very sweet and honororable but very misguided

It is like rehoming a crocodile

a nice thought but REALLY they have no place in our society

morningpaper · 19/02/2010 12:03

oh and heartsore, don't feel bad, as others have said, you have done all you can

Rindercella · 19/02/2010 12:15

Agree with MP.

However, Heartsore I do really feel for you. But you are absolutely doing the right thing imo. Hope your DD's hand heals ok.

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