The usual problem...how not to invite the whole class

[pigsinmud]

Dc4 will be 6 soon. I have always done parties at home and invited just a few children. This year we seem to have a problem though. She is in a mixed year group class - there are 10 yr1 girls and 4 yr 2 girls. She wants to invite 8 of the yr 1s and 2 of the yr2s. Is this acceptable?

I am worried about leaving the 2 yr1 girls out, not the yr 2s as she won't be in the same class as them again. She has nothing to do with these 2 yr1s though and doesn't really like them, so it seems crazy inviting them. Plus then i feel as though we need to invite the yr2s !!

Dh will be working and I feel happier about having 10 girls in the house rather than 14.

What to do??

Dh will be working

The no boys thing is her choice....she has 2 big brothers and I think that might have put her off.

It isn't the 8/14 that is the issue imo; it is the 8/10 that looks unfair. It is still excluding just two girls from the party, two who will be in her class next year too.

And it doesn't matter how invites get handed out. Children talk at school, esp the days before/after a party. There is no way the 2 excluded girls won't know abut it.

I couldn't do it. Others could. You have to make your choice.

I would say that inviting kids your dd doesn't play with to her party is ridiculous

I think while class parties are ridiculous for the same reason. Your child is not going to be invited to all parties in life, it does them no favours to pretend that they will be.

I must be so out of touch, no idea what parties DC haven't been invited to (they have been invited to quite few parties).
6/10 in her own year group would be more reasonable ,less pointed to those left out. But it's such a subtle thing, I'm impressed that anyone would notice.

My daughter has just come home from school upset as another girl has invited the whole class except for her and her friend. The birthday girl was happy to come to my daughters party and to ask to join in her dancing group this morning. Now that is nasty!

I think it really depends on how sure you are that she doesn't play/like the girls. If she really doesn't like them then you can't make her like them for her party, if it is just that she tends to play with other children but these girls are in the background, then maybe it would be better to invite them. I think by this stage in yr 1 friendships are slightly more stable, but you never know when they will come back with a new best friend.