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Parents of adult children

Wondering how to stop worrying about your grown child? Speak to others in our Parents of Adult Children forum.

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Thread 40 - Corona Cohort , Falling into Autumn 🍂

983 replies

CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee · 14/09/2022 07:43

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Be warned there might be lots of 'Uni Freshers' chat this time of year. My experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and support to be had !

OP posts:
Thread gallery
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Oblomov22 · 22/09/2022 04:03

That sounds really positive Cinnamon. Really good. Now now enough of that guilt. We don't do guilt here, do we? Wink

I am awake at 4am. Laughing at ican and her serated knives. I would offer to send germolene new skin, that I previously mentioned, for all those cuts but I've since discovered (trying to order new one seeing as ds1 has nicked my old one) that they've stop making it. Probably best (snowflake generation) really because it stings like a bugger, so what starts off as a small cut, after yelping in pain at the shock of the treatment might end up as a more serious coronary.

Volterra · 22/09/2022 04:07

That sounds positive @CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee. Hope she enjoys it as much as I did and DD currently is.

Fiddlersgreen · 22/09/2022 06:19

Sounds really positive @CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee love the therapy dog idea!

PhotoDad · 22/09/2022 06:21

A positive start for @CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee! Anyone moving today? I've completely lost track. Hard to believe that DD has been away for two weeks already.
Completely agree that this will feel very different when we have an empty nest: DS is still at home (in Year 11).

singingstones · 22/09/2022 06:28

First day of Nottingham drop offs today so I think a few are going, including us. I'm just about to wake DS, there's still quite a bit of packing to do before we leave.

EspeciallyDivided · 22/09/2022 06:44

That's a great start @CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee .

@icanbewhatiwant We have a sharp knife with a sheath both of which are brightly coloured which we take camping and on SC holidays as its safe to pack and keep in cutlery drawers, we have them in our work kitchen too, it's a Kuhn Rikon.

@Oblomov22 Boots do an alternative to New Skin called Spray Plaster.

I too can see how it must be much harder when the last DC leaves or if you are a lone parent. DD (y11) is much more independent and quieter than DD and I am missing him, we spent a lot of time together even when he moved into boarding last year. It will also only be about 5 mins till we're waving her off too. And while I am tentatively enjoying more free time it is hanging a bit heavy, I miss coming home from work, grabbing food and jumping in the car with one of them for swimming, football, hockey and the same at weekends. DD still swims but only at the local pool now which is only half a mile away so no lifts needed. We have always had all our best chats in the car. I also miss all the chats with other adults by the side of pools and pitches. I do have hobbies and friends to socialise with but DH and I have got out of the habit of doing much together, he has his own hobbies too. The three of us do a pub quiz with some friends once a week which is nice though.

Oblomov22 · 22/09/2022 06:48

We are almost ready, to set off to join the other Notts gang:
Oblomov, Heifer, Crazycrofter, Singing, Popcorn, ChristopherTracy, Mummy, Omni.

Piggywaspushed · 22/09/2022 06:56

Somany Nottinghamers!

Good Luck all!

singingstones · 22/09/2022 07:21

Hope everyone has a good day. DS is currently unpacking his clothes because he forgot to leave out something to wear today.
#goingwellsofar

sazzy5 · 22/09/2022 07:23

Oh wow, I hadn’t realised how many were at Nottingham. Safe journey.
@CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee sounding good, what a relief.
@EspeciallyDivided i am with you, I miss the chats and all the sporting activities. I have DS2 but now know how fast that time is going to go-we now have his provisional driving license ordered-that was the start of realising how grown up they are.
@icanbewhatiwant my DS sent me a photo of his food and his cut thumb, we didn’t pack plasters, luckily he is surrounded by kind girls in his flat who had plasters.

singingstones · 22/09/2022 07:23

Forgot to say, thoughts especially with @mummyinbeds and your car troubles, hope things go smoothly

Isthisjustnormal · 22/09/2022 07:25

Glad to hear better news @Understartersorders and fingers crossed the room situation feels like a positive once she’s settled in @CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee . Good luck to all the notts gang (and others - who else is off??) over the next few days! We’ll be heading up on Saturday…

ealingwestmum · 22/09/2022 07:44

Waving off all the Notts gang, have a great day!

NCTDN · 22/09/2022 07:47

We got this knife because I insisted it needed a cover! It's a good in between size. From ProCook.

Thread 40 - Corona Cohort , Falling into Autumn 🍂
NCTDN · 22/09/2022 07:47

Good luck to those off today Flowers for the parents!

ProggyMat · 22/09/2022 07:49

Well done to @CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee for the successful drop off and to mini orange for a very positive start!
Good luck to the Notts gang for today! 🍀

crazycrofter · 22/09/2022 07:52

I think we’re the only Notts people who chose Saturday drop off! Good luck everyone else, I’ll be picking your brains over the next few days!

singingstones · 22/09/2022 08:04

Already quite fractious here, it's going to be a long day

icanbewhatiwant · 22/09/2022 08:06

These are the knives;

Victorinox 11 cm Serrated Edge Tomato/ Utility Knife Blister Pack, Pack of 2, Orange amzn.eu/d/dLcXIhM

They are only small. But so sharp. They need to be in a container really. Maybe I can get a travel cutlery box just for a knife and fork as they'd fit in there. I did send plasters. I do have that second skin stuff. A germoline one. It stings like hell and the dc's have never let me apply it.

Good luck to those going off today. There are quite a few. @OrangeCinnamonCroissant glad dd's drop went ok.

Seeline · 22/09/2022 08:28

Glad yesterday went well @CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee and good luck to all Nottingham folk over the next few days!

DD has been really good at keeping in contact - WhatsApping several times a day. Facetimed for the first time last night to discover she's got her nose pierced! DH will freak 😲 She's only been gone 3 days....

Other than that, I think she is finding 13 in a flat difficult. There are too many of them to do stuff all together and it's hard to organise smaller groups. She said she can't even remember their names. That said she seems to be mixing with some, along with members of a chat group she was in before she left. She's had some induction sessions, and been to the society fair so will be going along to various dance taster sessions which is her main hobby. Early days I know, but so far, she seems to be coping.

Monkey2001 · 22/09/2022 08:31

@singingstones how is the cat?

ZittiEBuoni · 22/09/2022 08:40

Good luck to the Nottingham gang! Glad the Cardiff drop off went well too CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee, shame the room isn't ideal but will make a good conversation starter at least.

DD has the same useless hide & seek veins as me so the blood test was a bust - back next week.

DontCallMeBaby · 22/09/2022 08:42

I sent DD off with a set of three Ikea sharp knives, unpacked from their plastic pack and repacked in homemade sheathes (cut down cardboard box plus sellotape)😁I messaged her after we left to say not to discard them, we’ll need them for the end of the year - given they’re loose in a cupboard it might be better if they remain on.

I feel like our home situation is a little weird. DD is an only child, so it’s now just me and DH. However DD spent a lot of time in her room if not out, dropped her last club a while ago, AND has her own car so doesn’t need running around. So we don’t have that really obvious gap in the house - I forgot briefly this morning she wasn’t behind the closed bedroom door (I’d have it open, but cat has taken to pissing in inappropriate places).

@CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee that “what if she’s crying now?” would have absolutely broken me. Glad to hear she clearly wasn’t.

singingstones · 22/09/2022 08:44

@Monkey2001
He spent the night at the emergency vet as ours doesn't do 24hr care, we had a call at about 9pm to say very worried, the vet had done bloods and an ultrasound and he has a liver tumour, might need emergency surgery on his neck or maybe euthanasia. Poor DH stopped drinking at that point in case he had to go and be with him at the end. Half an hour later blood results came back fine, vet had spoken to his boss and apparently the tumour is a lesion that 50% of cats his age will have, no need to do anything and he might come home today! No news this morning so just waiting for him to be transferred back to our more sensible vet and hopefully he will be well enough to be scanned today.
The emergency vets are not great, our old vet used to take DCat home with her so that he didn't have to go there. She has left now, unfortunately. I am leaving DH with no car so hoping he doesn't have to rush over there today.

OublietteBravo · 22/09/2022 09:00

Chatting to my manager in the office today, and comparing notes. His DS headed off to Sheffield at the weekend. Our kids were at the site nursery together. It seems weird that they’re both adults now.