Thread 40 - Corona Cohort , Falling into Autumn 🍂

[CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee]

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Be warned there might be lots of 'Uni Freshers' chat this time of year. My experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and support to be had !

Wrong place, not time!

@singingstones no emails from Broadgate yet but DS pretty relaxed - just expects to get keys and further instructions from the reception when he goes on Saturday.

Welcome @ScarlettDarling and &
@SallCymru

@SallCymru I saw the first few posts of your thread earlier, I'm so sorry this has happened to him. Something similar happened to my DB many years ago, very shocking.

Thank you for the welcome! My son is off to Oxford which is right at the other end of the country to us. I’m going to miss him terribly but just hoping he’s happy there.

I read your thread too. It’s my worst nightmare @ sallCymru really hope he’s ok.

@SallCymru I have not read your thread, but have heard enough to know you and he must have been very distressed. I hope you are both feeling better and able to be positive about the year ahead.

@CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee has she made contact with flatmates or course mates on social media? Music departments are very nurturing and there will be lots of extra curricular opportunities, so if she makes it through the first couple of weeks she will be fine, but it sounds like she might be setting herself up to drop out. Is BF sensible and encouraging her to embrace it?

Welcome to @ScarlettDarling and @SallCymru, I'm new-ish to this thread and everyone is lovely. Sorry to hear about more wobbles from DC, especially when they lash out at you... no more advice to add to that upthread, but emotions are running high and that makes people act out-of-character, right?

@SallCymru i hope your Fd is ok

I'm with @Piggywaspushed that we need to be able to edit posts! I meant ds...

Thank you.
I have messaged him this morning to ask how his face is but no response yet!
He has however spoke to his brother and seems fine.
Typical not replying to Mum!

Thank you.
I’m hoping it’s worse for me than him and he’s taking it as a harsh lesson learned.

Thank you @Monkey2001
I hope so too.

@SallCymru just found your post and have not read it all, but if my DSs didn't tell me the truth about what happened in that situation it would be because they didn't want to worry me and were maybe embarrassed that it would probably not have happened if they had not been drunk. DS1 once got paralytic and lost his phone, although he was not attacked, and has never been that drunk again. So I think I would focus on being grateful that he got through it and learned a valuable lesson which means that he will be safer in future. Are you able to help him with a new phone?

Thank you.
Hopefully it hasn’t affected him too much and that he gets to enjoy his time there.

@SallCymru i saw your post, that is horrible for DS and so difficult for you-our first instinct is protecting our DC.
I have been so weepy, totally unlike me. Doesn’t help that he’s not overly happy in his halls, loads of girls, 2 other boys but neither are sociable. He got shunted all over the place to get his student ID but both places said they hadn’t got it. I’m hoping it gets more lively for him, as he seems to be staying in his room.

It’s so worrying anyway but this has made it so much worse
I’m hoping he’s ok.
Hasn’t responded to my message yet I’m just hoping he’s sleeping and doesn’t want Mum on his case!

Yes I think that’s why he lied to me.
I googled a phone shop for him and they fixed his screen on a Sunday for £75.
So thankfully that’s one night out that he won’t be able to go on having spent his money on that instead!

It is so hard without these kind of things happening isn’t it.
Hopefully when they start their courses they’ll make some more friends and things will get better.

sall, my DS1 is a bit of a legend on MN - broken about 4 phones, 'lost' his phone and all his bankcards whilst drunk in Crete on his 21st birthday, broken about 4 laptops, tells a lot of fibs and has basically failed his degree (resit results today)

Parenting doesn't stop at 18 and you are allowed on this thread to be dad, angry, confused, concerned, indulgent and even boastful.

We even buy them nice stuff

dad was sad - but dad is even allowed.

@SallCymru sorry I heard on here that your son was hurt - sending a hug to you and we are a friendly bunch xx

Thank you! And, wow, that's quite a feat for DS1, good luck with his results!

@SallCymru When I was your DS's age but home for holidays, I got very drunk and had to crash over with a friend, and told some half-truths to my parents. I think that it's the only time that I ever did! So... the main thing is that he's safe now.

@BlueMarigold Ds is very anti the royal family. He tells me everyone his age is. One of ds's flatmates has an uncle in the parade, so he's watching it. I thought Ds would watch too...but he told me not to be stupid and just complained that everything is shut. Are they anti royal family at that age? Ds1 likes the royals.

Welcome @ScarlettDarling @SallCymru.

@ScarlettDarling what's he studying at Oxford? We are in the south and our DD is off to Durham so even though 3rd one still feels along way away.

@icanbewhatiwant My DD was terrified by a "why don't you have a TV licence?!?" letter that was waiting for her at uni so didn't watch it live. However, as an artist/illustrator she's fascinated by uniforms and ceremonial (costuming is one of her 'things') so she's probably going to watch the procession on catch-up.