Those June/July babies

[motherinferior]

Just wondered how everyone's getting on, having actually produced?

I'm absolutely knackered, and have very nasty tear which is giving me grief (I ripped into the muscle a bit) but am in much MUCH better shape than with dd2 - and dd1 is thoroughly enthusiastic. Mind you, dd2 is still asleep most of the time. I'm aware that the next few weeks and months are going to be, ahem, not the easiest, which is why I thought it might be worth keeping in touch...?

Happyspider - you still managed to breastfeed more much longer than I managed either time, congratulate yourself on that and if you can still fit in some breastfeeds do. As they say everybit helps...

Don't worry about looking for sympathy - it won't be long till you as experienced mother are dolling out the advice.

I hate to say it Happyspider - wait until DS starts moving, then your house will be messy and if you decide to have another one then just forget it...

Happyspider, how about deciding to b/f night and morning - so you've got a structure - and bottle feed the rest of the day? That's what I did with dd1. She dropped the b/fs herself at around 10 months.

I have, incidentally, decided that we are all doing really pretty damn well. Just look how far we've come!

that's a good idea MI, I will give it a try.
Sometimes I feel I could just stop breastfeeding altogether as he is not getting that much from me anymore. However I am glad I haven't stopped as he still looks for my breast when looking for comfort (i.e. at his last jab) and that makes me feel good about myself.

I looked at nurseries the other day as I'm due back to work soon and nearly cried while on the phone to one of them as it really seemed so soon I am going to leave him.

Ladies, how did you cope when your first child started nursery?

kaz, you say wait until he starts walking... it really seems very distant in time for me.

However he can now sit up even though I still have to hold him he is quite steady and can manage for a few seconds by himself: I think it's amazing and cannot wait to see when he starts crawiling, I will have to deal with messy (messier home...) then

JUst decided that it is time for DS1 to drop his afternoon nap - first day today, all in all in went quite well.

happyspider, my dd1 didn't go to nursery as I only worked evenings, but dd2 is going to start with a childminder at the beginning of November and I am completely dreading it, although am looking forward to getting out and back to work as its only part time. When I think about leaving her there I start to cry so I just try not to think too hard, and also to appreciate that she will be more than happy there and it will be an enriching experience for her. And the thought of picking her up afterwards and kissing and cuddling her to bits will keep me going I'm sure. Don't worry, you'll be fine.

I have to admit I was deeply relieved to start work after dd1 was born - at one level I was still utterly convinced I wasn't 'right' for motherhood, and that she'd be better off with someone else looking after her . This time round I'm much, much more relaxed around the baby and I do feel much sadder about leaving her - but I don't have a choice, and I do like my work, luckily! And I only work four days a week, based from home, and stop at 4.30 (start hideously early) so I'm there to pick them up at 4.50 or so, and can wurble slowly back with dd1 chatting to me about such weighty current affairs as Look At Our Shadows Mummy, and There's A Doggy.

They really, really, get a lot from being with other people. I firmly believe that. My dd1 has a real circle of children and adults who care a lot about her. When I had dd2 she stayed at her childminder's overnight, and most of the family came round really quickly to see the baby. She goes to playgroup, she sees her mates, she has a space to be 'her', and I think that's lovely.

But I will miss my little one - ideally I'd like three days working, one day with dd2 and one day with both of them, but it would COST so much!!!!

oh and Dahlia, how was the holiday?

I am very lucky as I am on paid maternity leave until mid December when DS2 will be 7 and a half months old. Its been quite a rollercoaster but I have really enjoyed being at home with my boys.

I am with you MI, when DS1 I was quite glad to be going back to work - grateful for the nanny coming in and taking over as I no idea what I was doing. Now Idon't believe that is necessary true but I also belief that good quality childcare whether childminder, nursery, or nanny are positive things in a babies development. If you are happy with your childcare arrangements then the baby will be happy - more love and attention can only be a good thing.

I am really going to miss my boys when I go back to work and am very sad about it. However, our new nanny will be excellent I'm sure and the lads will be fine.

I am very lucky as I am on paid maternity leave until mid December when DS2 will be 7 and a half months old. Its been quite a rollercoaster but I have really enjoyed being at home with my boys.

I am with you MI, when DS1 I was quite glad to be going back to work - grateful for the nanny coming in and taking over as I no idea what I was doing. Now Idon't believe that is necessary true but I also belief that good quality childcare whether childminder, nursery, or nanny are positive things in a babies development. If you are happy with your childcare arrangements then the baby will be happy - more love and attention can only be a good thing.

I am really going to miss my boys when I go back to work and am very sad about it. However, our new nanny will be excellent I'm sure and the lads will be fine.

I am very lucky as I am on paid maternity leave until mid December when DS2 will be 7 and a half months old. Its been quite a rollercoaster but I have really enjoyed being at home with my boys.

I am with you MI, when DS1 I was quite glad to be going back to work - grateful for the nanny coming in and taking over as I no idea what I was doing. Now Idon't believe that is necessary true but I also belief that good quality childcare whether childminder, nursery, or nanny are positive things in a babies development. If you are happy with your childcare arrangements then the baby will be happy - more love and attention can only be a good thing.

I am really going to miss my boys when I go back to work and am very sad about it. However, our new nanny will be excellent I'm sure and the lads will be fine.

OOOOps

MI, holiday was fab thanks - I swam and steamed and played with dd1 in the pool, ate far too much, had a drink or two, and generally relaxed. Oh, and tried out non-surgical liposculpture and lost an inch from my tummy! (Then put it back on with a huge slice of carrot cake straight afterwards).

Wow, look at the threads after us. Come a long way, haven't we?

Haven't we just. I went to see a close friend of mine yesterday who has just a baby boy - he was 6lb 2oz and I couldn't believe how incredibly tiny and fragile he was. I was all clumsy holding him, it just shows how quickly you forget. Have to say, she had the most horrific birth imaginable - a long drawn out labour and nothing really happening, then they suddenly lost the baby's heartbeat and the bed was suddenly surrounded by worried faces looking frantically at each other, then a midwife said to her dh, we need to do a section, and I mean NOW - and they literally slashed her open and yanked him out in 30 seconds. Scary eh? Suffice to say, she doesn't want any more kids!

Am not really awake yet, but it has just penetrated my thick head that I shouldn't have posted that last message. If anyone who's pregnant reads this, I apologise sincerely and hope I haven't frightened you.

Dahlia - you are very obviously shook up by the story. Personally I am have to remind myself at how lucky I am to have two strong healthy babies - no soon after your birth it is no suprise that you are feeling a little sensitive. I myself now a couple of horror stories but the majority of people have normal straightforward births and beautiful babies.

Our new Australian nanny started yesterday and I am amazed and how quickly DS1 has taken to her - much quicker than I envisaged. Think I definitely made the right choice.

Dahlia, I don't think you need to apologise. Are you OK? how is your friend?

Feeling knackered and slightly lowish here, but I think it's just that sort of day...contemplated my body in a mirror yesterday, that's sure to be what did it!

Hi there, haven't had a second to get on here for ages it seems,as we are house of ill. Ds has terrible cold and cough and dd has been running a temperature for the last 5 days on and off. She has no other symptoms just hot and feeding alot more. I just gave her some Medised and she is sleeping now bless her. Am relieved she is 3 months now so I can at least give her some medicine. I have the tickly night time cough and spend alot of time up and down the stairs, I have to sleep on the sofa as my coughing wakes up dd as she is in our room, so I am feeding her then going to the sofa for another hour or so of coughing, then perhaps an hour or so sleep before dh calls me back up! Trouble is I am certain she dosen't want to feed each time, she just wants to lie on me to go back to sleep but because of my coughing I can't. Woe is me.. Should I take her to the docs again do you think? I took her last friday but that day she didn't have a temp, but twice I have taken her for her 2nd lot of jabs and she did have one but no other symptoms at all..Anyway, other than all that I am fine!

Hi all!!! Hi Kaz, thanx for the invite, I haven't had a chance to come along till now!! So glad to "See" all u june/jul peeps, I could cry it's soooooo good that we keep contact, I went to the old thread and must admit was a bit sad that it was closed. I am a bit down at mo, dreaded PND has reared it's mean head!!
Hope all are better than me.

Jessi, might be worth the doc,for you as well? Sorry I was so hopeless yesterday - bugs here too. dd2 perpetually sleeping which I think is her way of fighting it off, but I actually got quite worried at one point - she's up for a bit, then clearly exhausted. I know I'm worrying too much but should I get her checked out?

same here, ds, normally an avid eater, is refusing his milk and sleeps a lot more.
He's not been his usual self since last week when he had his last jab.
I called the doctor a couple of times, but they said it was normal and to wait for him to go back to normal. I will go to the doctor again this afternoon if he refuses his milk again when he wakes up. His wet nappies are a bit less then before, but still wet so I am not worried he is dehydrated.

MI, I would still go to the doctor, better safe than sorry and they will understand your worries.
But then I am quite an apprehensive mother, so this is what I would do.

Hope this epidemic goes soon....

Hi everyone and welcome Champs - I can't remember is this your first ? What sex ? And how old now ?

I'm really sad to hear you think you have PND - certainly I have had depression after both boys. Not sure whether i would could it PND, but certainly talking about my feelings as an incompetent mum, scared and frightened helped me so PLEASE DO talk to us.

Nwe nanny is fab after two and a half days my DS1 is so at ease with her and I feel with having her in my not so large two bed flat.

Kaz- is my 2nd, both are boys, ds2 is 9wks old.
Today was not so bad, kept very busy. Ds1 had parent teacher day so was geared up to that. Didn't bother to go to my doc appt. Doc said to came to talk about PND but she said if I could leave baby wiv someone!!! Being so little, he has all kinds of waking/ sleeping hours and i breast feed!! He will not stay away from me for too long.... I wonder if she has any children?! My doc surgery has different docs and you see different ones. They wont allow pre booked appts and u hav to call in morn to see a doc I only met that doc wen I had 6wk check up. Maybe I should change docs wat u all think?

Champs, sorry, actually read PND as PMT (!). I think you should just go and see a doc, whoever you get on the day, and go with the baby. They are supposed to take PND seriously. Turn up and ask for a referral to a counsellor - otherwise you may just get a doc wurbling on and telling you to cheer up (like the consultant I saw when I was pregnant, because I've had depression before - for some bizaare reason I got referred to an obstetrician!).

Curiously enough even though I've been depressed and my midwife was very concerned about me, as far as the docs and HV are concerned I could have died by now - nobody's asked me a damn thing. Makes me very cross. So you get down there, honey, and take the baby with you. Lots and lots of love. xxxxx