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Parenting

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Naked children

235 replies

nappyaddict · 01/06/2009 12:57

Which of these places do you let your children run around naked?

  1. Public paddling pool
  2. Outdoor swimming pool
  3. Whilst using the play equipment at the park
  4. Beer garden
  5. Your street
OP posts:
annoyingdevil · 01/06/2009 20:49

tbh, I'd much rather see children naked than wearing bikinis

KingCanuteIAm · 01/06/2009 20:51

According to studies done (in the US) on sexual abuse victims the singular thing that most disturbed those victims and left the most lasting damage was the knowledge that there either was or could be photographs of them on the internet. Sometimes the photos could be of them actually being abused or just pictures of them without clothing.

One of the problems for victims was that the knowledge that people would/could be using pictures of them to get their jollies, this was felt to be a continuation of the abuse.

The second problem was that those pictures could be found at a later date by anyone a boyfriend, a co-worker, a family member. THe knowledge that at any time someone from their re-built life may find out, explicitaly, what happened to them was reported as being the number one fear for victims.

Taking a photo does not hurt a child, what can be done with that photo can, actually, ruin a childs life and they may not even know about it until the day someone asks why there is a picture of them on the internet.

I have been in the position of having to wait weeks on end to find out if pictures on a hard drive were pictures of my children, to find out if pictures of my naked children had been circulated to paedophiles across the world. The, very real, thought that my children could have to live with the risk of that hitting them one day made me physically sick and still makes me feel that way. Luckily for me they were not but I cannot feel glad for that because all it means is that someone elses child is being circulated, jerked over, photoshopped to appear to be doing almost anything.

This is not hysteria, this is actual life. Yes it does not happen to everyone however the fact that it could is more than enough for me. I will not take that risk again, I also think other people shouldn't however I would never presume to tell another parent their business in that way.

BonsoirAnna · 01/06/2009 21:04

SolidGold - rare, perhaps, but it does happen. A 13 year old girl from DD's school was the victim of an attempted rape just near the school only a couple of weeks ago. The paedophiles that hang out around the park are not family members.

paisleyleaf · 01/06/2009 21:17

"tbh, I'd much rather see children naked than wearing bikinis"

ikwym

My DD's 4. And was naked on the beach the other day (we didn't have swim stuff with us). I think I think yes to 1 and 2 in the OP. Anywhere playing in water and I've got no cossie I suppose.
She also usually has her bath in the garden in the summer months.

However, about a year ago (it's stuck in my mind) DD had stripped off at home. My mum was visiting and said "aren't you getting a bit old for that now"?
3! There was no-one else there - just me and my mum and DD. It took me aback.

Sassybeast · 01/06/2009 21:24

None.

funnypeculiar · 01/06/2009 21:26

Haven't read the thread yet

  1. Yes, assuming fully potty trained. Dd (3) does this atm - ds (5) would now want to have something on. I would normally have swimmers available, but if, say, they wanted to have a quick dip without, fine.
  2. Probably no - not 'official' swmimming pool behaviour
  3. Yes if 'drying off' post paddle/having mad-dog moment but not for long - injury rather than indecency.
  4. No, too many non-parents who might not wany naked flesh flashed at them. Actually, that goes for 2 as well. I feel that if other parents can't deal with naked chiodren on view, that's there problem. I have more sensibitiy for non-parents

All yes-s assume not too hot/suncream/hats in place

Will read thread now...

SolidGoldBrass · 01/06/2009 22:18

Oh why not just put everyone in burkas in case some thing bad happens, FFS!

KingCanuteIAm · 01/06/2009 22:23

SGB, you can be as offensive as you like, I am happy with my choice and I doubt know you having a mini rant will change my mind.

blackrock · 01/06/2009 22:25

beach or garden would be fine!! Or if the weather is sunny and there was a paddling pool ...pants or knickers.

blackrock · 01/06/2009 22:25

Burnt bits must be painful!

norksinmywaistband · 01/06/2009 22:29
  1. Public paddling pool - yes
  2. Outdoor swimming pool - yes
  3. Whilst using the play equipment at the park - no, (but probably in very little), as metal equipment can be very hot on delicate bottoms
  4. Beer garden - no but only because I don't take them to pubs
  5. Your street - they were today

I have never had a problem with nudity, I am often being told off by DH for walking round with very little on in front of windows, always sit in my own garden topless and if neighbours DC didn't keep popping their head over the fence, would probably be nude out there as well.

I have no problem with toddlers out and about nude, But I would get them dressed for trips out ie school run, shops etc. Mainly because of what is expected in public and like we teach our children all sorts of conventions, such as how to eat with a knife and fork, I will teach them to wear clothes when out in non appropriate places

ByThePowerOfGreyskull · 01/06/2009 22:32
  1. Public paddling pool would encourage pant wearing if no swimmies with us but wouldn't panic if they took them off.

  2. Outdoor swimming pool can't see us being there without swimmies so no need

  3. Whilst using the play equipment at the park would insist on some clothing

  4. Beer garden would have them wear clothing but can't work out why they would take their clothes off there anyway

  5. Your street if we are going to get something from the car and they had no clothes on and followed me I wouldn't mind.

LittleMissBliss · 01/06/2009 22:48

Ds was naked in the paddling pool in the garden this morning. I'd let him run arround naked in a friends garden or relatives.

probably not park, beer garden street or any where else public as there would be no need for him to be naked.

The only reason he was naked in the pool was because he would have got his clothes all wet and nappies just get soaked. Plus it's good for toddlers and babies to have nappy free time.

Plonker · 01/06/2009 22:50

In relation to my toddler ...

  1. Public paddling pool - no, but dd isn't fully potty trained yet and therefore I would have a swim nappy on her

  2. Outdoor swimming pool - again, no, because she isn't fully potty trained. I have no probs other than that though. I distinctly remember coming across a outdoor paddling pool on a hot summers day when older dd's were around 5 and 2 - they nakked off straight away and played gleefully (along with around 20 other naked 2 - 6yr olds!!)

  3. Whilst using the play equipment at the park - definitely no. I would be worried about her hurting herself or friction burns. I would prob look like this -> if I saw naked children on the park ...I don't think it's safe

  4. Beer garden - no. Safety again (broken glass, drunken adults treading on delicate toes etc)

  5. Your street - moot point as can't play out on my street.

I have no problem with general nakedness though and am perfectly happy for dd to run around naked at home/in the garden/in friends gardens/on the beach
I am and at those who wouldn't let their child go naked because of fear of paedophiles. I find that very sad ...

delphinedownunder · 02/06/2009 02:13

Well, I wouldn't let my dts go naked outside at all because here in NZ you would burn to a crisp within minutes. I spend all summer chasing them around with long sleeved tops, sunhats and suncream. The other deterent is the vicious sandfly, which can drive you inside within seconds. Oherwise, I'd have no problem with swimming and paddling pools and the beach. Perhaps not a playground or a beer garden (if such a thing existed) - not a casual enough environment and if I wouldn't be comfortable in swimmers, I don't think my children should be naked.

nooka · 02/06/2009 05:38

My two are 8 and 10 and their naked days are over for a while because they wouldn't be comfortable. However I don't have an issue with them just wearing their pants if a skinny dipping moment should present itself. dh thinks that they are too old for that though. However now we live somewhere with a serious summer being naked or more than a few minutes would really not be a very good idea.

When they were little I'd be fine with 1) only. I don't know any public pools that would be happy with children without a swimsuit of some sort, three seems like a very foolish idea (too much ouch potential) I can't see why they'd need to strip in a beer garden or in the street. I guess I think nakedness in the summer is about getting wet, but then my children never really did the stripping of clothes thing - they would have quite happily jumped in pools/under fountains with all their clothes on (forgetting that they would then have had to get home using public transport - I learned to take a stock of spare t-shirts/shorts very early on!).

Othersideofthechannel · 02/06/2009 05:55

I think I'd go with whatever the child is comfortable with.
DS is 6 and last year started asking for us to hide him behind a towel when he changed at the beach.
He still strips off in our garden, he likes to run around naked in the rain.

christiana · 02/06/2009 06:47

Message withdrawn

Littlepurpleprincess · 02/06/2009 06:58

No to all of them. Sun burn in childhood is what leeds to skin cancer in later life. I will teach DS that it's not ok to expose all that skin to the sun.

It has nothing to do with offending people. I think at 3yrs old he should be able to run around naked, if we're out of the sun.

Btw, DS has VERY fair skin and red ish hair so I'm a bit paraniod.

cory · 02/06/2009 07:26

in Sweden, under age of 5 or so, all these places would be fine

in the UK, as an immigrant, I have to take account of people's sensibilities

probably erred on the side of caution as a the toddler/nudity hangup just seems bizarre to me

anyway, both my children now too old (9 and 12), so question will not arise

but for those of you who say you would put on pants or bikini- it can hardly be a burns/skin cancer issue then; backs burn as much as bottoms and far more than fanjos

insertwittynicknameHERE · 02/06/2009 07:29

None.

DD (18mo) does at home, but not when it is very hot as she would burn no matter how much sunscreen I put on her. In the house is a different matter, she loves being naked in the house.

cory · 02/06/2009 07:30

and the paedophile argument also seems a bit odd

whether a man is going to interfere with a child will depend on whether he can get it away from its mum, not on whether its bottom is covered up

can't imagine a paedophile being held back by the fact that a child is respectably dressed

KingCanuteIAm · 02/06/2009 07:38

Cory, please see post re the damage of pictures. A paedophile does not have to even touch a child to harm them, so forget abduction!

Abduction risk is only really relevant if the op had been "woul yu leave your child alone in these places" and even then i think the risk of abduction is minute.

christiana · 02/06/2009 07:41

Message withdrawn

KingCanuteIAm · 02/06/2009 07:43

Read what I said before, it is covered in there, I don't really want to type it all again.