Absolutely fuming at what I perceive to be lazy parenting causing my daughter to be injured today

[Blottedcopybook]

When I take my kids out anywhere, I can appear rude in company because I'm extremely easily distracted because I watch my kids like a hawk. I don't let them behave like little brats both because I want them to grow up and have respect for people around them, and I don't want anybody to be able to judge me as a lazy or bad parent. I don't consider the local soft play to be somewhere I can dump and ignore my little horrors as they rampage around the place with no consideration or care for anyone else, I actually watch what they're up to.

I'm just back from A&E with a concussed, grumpy and sore 22 month old DD. We were at the soft play this afternoon and she had come over to where I was sitting to get a drink. As she turned to go back and play, a group of half a dozen boys aged roughly 5-6 years old came running down from the SEATING AREA (not the soft play section) with such speed that when the ringleader hit DD (with his hands out, which was dreadfully kind of him) he knocked her off her feet and she flew a good three feet backwards before landing on the back of her head. Her eyes rolled back in her head and she vomited before starting screaming, I was leaping out of my seat at this point and angrily told the boy (without shouting, I might add) that he was running far too fast and should have more consideration for the other children. At this point, the group of adults with these little sh!ts were maybe three or four picnic tables behind me and not one of them moved until I gave this child into trouble. Not one of them asked if she was okay, or if they could help me. I'm 7 months pregnant and was there with my three children.

DD was BY FAR not the smallest kid there. We had to leave to go to A&E and getting our stuff together took a good 10 minutes during which time this group were in the baby & toddler section throwing balls at each other and generally being rowdy which is FINE for a soft play environment, but specifically why there are age-specific areas. None of the parents intervened, none of them apologised for DD getting hurt and none of them offered to help me get out to her car with one screaming hurt toddler, another screaming upset toddler who was frightened and worried about his sister and the 7 year old carrying my two bags.

I am so unbelievably angry.

Thanks if you read all that, I don't really have anyone to rant to tonight!

Soft play is for the devil's spawn.

Hope your dd is feeling better. Hope you are too.

That's shite.Am and for you.

Its not the children, but the crap parents. Grrrr for you.

You poor thing. What a horrible experience.

This kind of behaviour is all too common.

I really hope your dd is ok. Do you have anybody to help you, or are you on your own?

That's why I never go to those things.

I went a couple of times, but got sick of big kids entering the small childrens' area and no one doing a damn thing about it.

We have to live with enough thugs in society without having to pay to go associate with thug parents in soft play.

Sorry about your dd and of course they should have noticed what happened and taken action to help you BUT it was an accident - children run and the running in itself is not a bad thing. It must have been awful for you though - how do you feel now (apart from angry!)

I would be the same . Your poor dd .
Actually I had to catch my dd 3.3 today (am also 7 months pg) after stood watching her play on a slide another Mum and her son came along and she allowed him to run up the slide and then he shoved my dd so she went flying backwards . It was just lucky I was stood so close to catch her .
The Mum just said "Oh now be careful" but never asked how my screaming dd was .

Really hope your dd is ok sounds like a total nightmare . I agree though softplay is the work of the devil avoid if at all possible .

hope ur dd is ok i went to soft play area on sun and was lucky as it was quiet, but still some kids running about in the food area. It's annoying when ur the only one telling ur child not to makes me feel really mean, but i try and not let my kids behave in a way that is dangerous or annoying to others x

Very sorry this has happened to you.

But tbh, it's what you can expect from a soft play centre. They're full of yobbos, I don't understand why anyone goes to them.

Sounds like an accident to me!! Sorry.

I agree, LittleBella

Hope DD is ok. I think soft play areas bring out the worst in both parents and children. I'd never be brave enough to go without 2 adults.

It's funny, I would normally never have gone to soft play at this time of the afternoon - usually we'd go in the morning when the big kids are at school because it's really pleasant for the toddlers, but I completely underestimated how many older kids would be there.

noavailablename Hubby is here now. His work is literally across the road from the hospital so he came and met us there, and has dealt with dinner, washing and bedtime so I could lie down.

expat Yes!! £10.50 for an hour, before I even looked at food and drink since you're not allowed to bring your own and there were 5-6 staff members floating around doing nothing to keep the big kids where they were supposed to be. In fairness, the manager came straight to my assistance because she heard DDs head hit the floor but too little too late you know?

Northernlurker I agree to a point I think, if she'd been in the big kids section then I'd have called it as a fair cop, but I felt they shouldn't have been bombing around the seating area not least because almost every parent sitting at the flimsy picnic tables had a cup of tea/coffee/hot choc etc.

I'm okay now, thanks everyone. Sad for DD especially because she now has to miss her gymnastics class tomorrow which she loves, she's okay if a little subdued tonight.

Sorry! Convo moving v. fast. I've never experienced this side of soft play before and I'm so shocked, but as I usually go during school hours it's generally a good experience for the toddlers. Today has just put me off ever going back.

I'd complain to the soft play manager - if there are staff there they need to be enforcing what rules they have. I rather like our local soft play cos it's small, quiet on weekday afternoons when I go and the staff are prepared to tell off older kids (and their parents) when they are bouncing around in the toddler area.

It is entirely reasonable to expect help and action when your child has been injured in their building.

hello blotted, I'm so sorry this happened to your dd, I agree whole heartedly it IS lazy parenting.

I started a thread on this v sam subject a while ago under the name peacelily, i.e. why do parents think it's acceptable for their +5 kids to rampage all over the toddler area and not do anything about it, at least asj them to move to their own (massive and well equipped) area.

I was thouroughly falemd by the mumsnet mafia and told not to be so precious overberaing etc. "parents should be allowed a break" "staff should police it" etc.etc.
Errr, actually it was half term, not "break" time, i was also told not to take her there in half term if I was being so "pfb" about it and to "expect" this.

An accident yes, but I would expect the parents to monitor their kids, intervene, remonstrate if neccessary and help you out!!!!

Rant over

I would be incandescent with rage.
I go to soft play occassionally but luckily am able to go to the toddlers' time, when it is all little ones. Still get annoyed by people who don't check their kids from time to time, butu generally it is fine.
Your poor dd - what an awful shock.

That is terrible, poor little girl. If my son had done that he would have got the bollocking of his life (not that he would have as I employ the same watching like a hawk tactic). I have in the past received verbal abuse from older children when I have politely asked them to leave the toddler area. DS and his friend (both very sweet innocent little lads, this is before they went to school of course) were subjected to verbal abuse and then pushed down a slide, just because they were taking their time about sliding. I often end up berating other people's children for hurting my son or his friends as the parents are never anywhere to be seen. I'm such a dragon!

That's why I don't bother with soft play.

Bella summed it up.

Parents get a break when they go out without their children, I do believe this why I can't fully concentrate on what other people are telling me when my dcs are about as I always have one eye on them or listening out for them

I hope your DD is alright and not shaken by the episode. I am also one of those parents who feels like I am responsible 24 hours a day 7 days a week because, frankly, until my kids are old enough to be responsible for themselves in certain situations, I am. As a lawyer, I see it as being a question of fact that children are not held responsible for themselves in these places. If there were an incident with the question as to who is culpable, it usually boils down to the question of negligence and contributory negligence (eg parents/carers and play centres). Parents cannot remove themselves from the equation. There are too many parents who like to take a break in these places without fully realising that it is only alright to do so to a certain extent. They still remain the responsible adult and should be watching their kids to ensure they are behaving appropriately, which means staying in the age appropriate places and not running where there are accidents waiting to happen.

It does sound like an accident (albeit assisted by rowdy behaviour) and these things do happen but I am sorry to hear the parents involved did nothing as it should have given them an opportunity to show the child how much harm can arise in these situations. The parents' behaviour stands out as the worst. Children are children and unless given guidance do not have the judgment or ability to monitor their behaviour at a young age.

surely the whole point of soft play is to wear the kids out, allowing you to go home, plonk them infront of a dvd thus giving you your time for the wine you need after going to softplay break.

That is horrendous - but I am not going again or different reasons mainly that every time we go DD comes back with some really awful sickness bug from the filthy balls and equipment. I despise these places too...

Moral of tale: don't ever go to a soft play place ever again.

They are my Room 101. The noise, the other people, the dirt, the smell...