Absolutely fuming at what I perceive to be lazy parenting causing my daughter to be injured today

[Blottedcopybook]

When I take my kids out anywhere, I can appear rude in company because I'm extremely easily distracted because I watch my kids like a hawk. I don't let them behave like little brats both because I want them to grow up and have respect for people around them, and I don't want anybody to be able to judge me as a lazy or bad parent. I don't consider the local soft play to be somewhere I can dump and ignore my little horrors as they rampage around the place with no consideration or care for anyone else, I actually watch what they're up to.

I'm just back from A&E with a concussed, grumpy and sore 22 month old DD. We were at the soft play this afternoon and she had come over to where I was sitting to get a drink. As she turned to go back and play, a group of half a dozen boys aged roughly 5-6 years old came running down from the SEATING AREA (not the soft play section) with such speed that when the ringleader hit DD (with his hands out, which was dreadfully kind of him) he knocked her off her feet and she flew a good three feet backwards before landing on the back of her head. Her eyes rolled back in her head and she vomited before starting screaming, I was leaping out of my seat at this point and angrily told the boy (without shouting, I might add) that he was running far too fast and should have more consideration for the other children. At this point, the group of adults with these little sh!ts were maybe three or four picnic tables behind me and not one of them moved until I gave this child into trouble. Not one of them asked if she was okay, or if they could help me. I'm 7 months pregnant and was there with my three children.

DD was BY FAR not the smallest kid there. We had to leave to go to A&E and getting our stuff together took a good 10 minutes during which time this group were in the baby & toddler section throwing balls at each other and generally being rowdy which is FINE for a soft play environment, but specifically why there are age-specific areas. None of the parents intervened, none of them apologised for DD getting hurt and none of them offered to help me get out to her car with one screaming hurt toddler, another screaming upset toddler who was frightened and worried about his sister and the 7 year old carrying my two bags.

I am so unbelievably angry.

Thanks if you read all that, I don't really have anyone to rant to tonight!

Hmm, parents who rip the head off another person who dared so much as look cock-eyed at their child.

No wonder so many people act ghetto these days.

They learn it at home.

I hope your dd is ok, sounds horrid and very frightening.
I took my dd to soft play once, she was only about 7 months old, but they had a small baby area. It was quite empty but there were a group of mums chatting in a corner. There was a little girl about 10ft away from me who was jumping off some seats onto the hard floor, so i said to her "perhaps you should play on the soft area" as there was no parent near her and she was only about 2 and a half, she ignored me, so i sat back down, next thing there is a crash and a scream and she is on the floor. I ran over to her, she wasn't hurt but a bit shocked and scared, so i sat talking to her and asked which one her mum was, so i could get her for her, next thing her mother comes up, picks little girl up gives me a dirty look and walks off.
I felt horrible and left and haven't been back since. I have no problem keeping an eye on other peoples children for them for 2 mins so they can go to the loo or whatever, but i think it was irresponsible for these parents to think they can dump their kids. I felt so guilty that i hadn't stopped this girl from hurting herself, but at the same time, i was there with my dd not to look after other peoples kids. It is quite shocking how some people are with their children, i'm sure it is only a very few, but every play centre/park/shopping centre seems to have one!

Sorry so long, its just one of those things that wind me up!!!

I take mine to a soft play centre. Occassionally. I make it quite clear that they are not to look at me, come near me, ask me anything, speak to me, ask for anything. No eye contact with mummy or an hour ok??

cafe latte+paper+don't look up=not a BAD afternoon

'cafe latte+paper+don't look up=not a BAD afternoon '

except for everyone else who has to put up with your kids because you can't be bothered.

why not take them to IKEA, put them in the creche and get your peace that way, knowing that, well, they're being babysat.

LOL at rip your head off parents.

They are exactly the type who predominate at soft play centres.

Yes they are the play equivalent of fruit shoots.

Actually, you can go out and play in the rain. Rain hasn't changed from 30 years ago, neither have children. And probably the quality of wellies etc., are better than they were then.

MsBeauregarde, that is really lazy parenting I'm amazed you have the front to admit it. I wouldn't want anyone to know I did stuff like that (which I don't)

They are awful places, what's wrong with the park for wearing kids out, having said that I've just booked one for DD's birthday but like you I'm like a cat on hot bricks the whole time.
You did very well not to shout, I would have put the fear of god into the little bugger.

It's true expat. It's learnt at home primarily. It's a shame that all parents can't look out for each other's children. The world would be a much nicer place wouldnt it?

I don't think it's passive aggressive, there's no way I'd "rip anyones head off" if dd had caused them an injury and a concerned parent was telling them off, I would be upset if they were screaming and shouting but the op didn't even raise her voice.

I'd apologise and make her apologise but each to their own....

Well expat, as I take them after school there aren't that many toddlers there.

Also, even unsupervised, my children know better than to throw their full weight upon somebody half their size. They aren't 'rough'. But I couldn't bear to stand over them monitoring their every move.

I DID that when they were tiny to protect them in the event of any potential hazard. Now that they're older, I see it that it's the turn of the tiny tots' parents to hover over their children.

ps, I'm not a lazy parent. I am constantly pandering to their every whim, washing, cooking, supervising homework...

It's all relative. As I've said before, my idea of dangerous is different. Grew up on a farm. Soft play areas being perceived as dangerous IS quite amusing to me. Riding the cows bareback and risking ringworm; quite hazardous.

MsBeauregarde - The thing is your kids can ride cows bare back if they want - I hope mine will use a condom if they must do it at all - as long as they aren't hurting other children by slamming into them.
If mine are/were tearing around and liable to knock someone flying I'd ask them to calm down, you can't do that if you have your nose in this weeks copy of Hello?closer.

Unquietdad LMAO! Spot on ime
Thanks I needed a giggle today
Minx see you at HOHeels sometime lo!, Yep I recognised the place from your description!
DP and I wont be in the cafe btw, we will be playing with the kids or watching them like hawks

I have a sneaking admiration for you, Mrs beauregarde

FWIW, and from a quick skim through this thread, I think the problem with soft play is that children of many ages and sizes are all together. Even if there is a designated toddler play area, there is lots of running around and mixing.

I'd say a 21 month old toddler is a bit on the young side to be safe in a busy play centre unless an adult is constantly on standby and eagle eyed - and even then accidents could happen.

I see that the OP was more cross with the casual parents than the excited boys, and realised it was an accident - I too would have been annoyed at the parents' lack of concern. But I also think the boys were at a more appropriate age for the facilities.

EleanorRigby, that's hilarious! Don't go over there too much, I've found one in Macclesfield, bit of a trek but MASSIVE, better food and bigs kids area is miles from toddlers area!

Thanks tigermoth.

I can't believe some people would really consider me a bad or a lazy parent because I'm not parenting other people's children.

If I take my children to a softplay centre, then is it MY job to stand over their children?

OK, my children are good kids which helps. I CAN trust them not to hurt smaller ones. They'd fight amongst themselves pretty visciously though!

Just scrolled back to see what uqd said that is so funny and he's right.

Get an appointment with the manager and tell your side of the story. Make it clear that you want answers as to why the play centre staff were so unhelpful when your child could have been hurt much more severely. Having notices up saying that they are not liable and people are there at their own risk is standard, but first aid could and should have been offered. Better supervision of all areas, not just the play area by staff could be implemented. They could make the goodwill gesture of refunding your admission charges, but they will probably view this as admitting fault. How many staff were there on duty, can you remember? I bet there were very few. I wonder if this could be deemed negligence on their part.

I'd look into their health and safety as another person said. Consider taking the story to the local press if the manager is unhelpful or evasive, they won't want the public to know that "if your child gets hurt here we will do nothing to help."

Hope your little girl is better soon.

I am embarrassed no-one helped you or offered any kind of support.
I'd like to think I would have realised what was happening had I been there but saying that, on the handful of occasions I have been to soft play areas, I have been so busy keeping my ds in check that I may not have seen the peripherals.

These places do seem to bring out the most boisterous side of ds. It is not fair if it impacts on others though...

I hope you and yours are ok.

Haven't read the whole thread. I don't go to softplay places much but occasionally take DD2 (5) and a friend.

The last time we went (half-term) my DD and her friend came running over to me highly distressed because 'a big boy' had bitten DD because he wanted a turn on the equipment she was playing on. Sure enough, her arm was red and there were the teeth marks! I asked them to take me to said boy (who was around 9) and I asked him if he had done this. He refused to answer me - just looked at the floor. He also refused to tell me where his parents were and as the place was so crowded I had no way of finding out for myself.

I admit I was so livid and keen to make sure he didn't do it again I didn't shout but went upto his face and firmly warned him that if he hurt DD or her friend again that he was 'headed for trouble'. I don't give a rat's behind if anyone heard me (least of all his parents). It just makes me sick that your children can't be safe in a so-called 'children's' play area.

Rant over.

We once told a 4 year old off for throwing sand in our babies face and he told us to fuck off, you did well caro lol