Was anyone NOT hit when they were growing up?

[bohemianbint]

Following on from my other thread, have been talking to DH who was leathered when he was growing up, as was I. We were talking about whether this happened to everyone - I have a few friends who I don't think were hit, but I can't be sure.

So, was it most people's experience because it was accepted that that's how you did it?

(I recently told my father that we would not be hitting our children and he said, "but how will they learn?" )

I think I was smacked as a young toddler (parents no longer around to ask). However it must have been very very infrequent as I cannot remember it ever happening.

However, my father disciplined even the smallest of misdemeanours with full-on sergeant major style screaming, until I was scared out of my wits.

Quite a lot of smacks, I also did the "Didn't hurt" thing as well. I think this certainly the norm amongst my friends.

I had the odd smack from my Mum (always on the back of the legs and very very occasionally with her slipper (but tbh I think the smack with her hand hurt more)

I have to say I have smacked dd1 a few times but on occasions where she has been seriously naughty and dd2 has had a few taps on the hand (she is blimmin fascinated by the oven and can open the kitchen door now [grrr])

My mum used to threaten me and my brother with a great big orange plastic carpet wacker. But it was more for show and for wacking furniture to make a really scary sound!
But once we turned 11yrs old we kept hidding it and then she started hitting us. So i think the threat of something is better than the alternative.
I just say to my DDs that if they are very naughty some of their toys will be confiscated until i think they will behave.

my Dad has never smacked me or my brother but he had a 1,2,3 system I never made it past 2 (the tone in his voice said it all) my brother made it to 3 once (my parents knew he was lying but he wouldnt admit it) my dad got some soap and put it in my brothrs mouth and then wouldnt let him have a drink (my brother was 14 at the time and it was a serious lie) I remember sneaking in a can of coke into his room when my Mum and Dad weren't looking)

Good god bohemian, that is not just the odd smack, that is awful.

Yes - not with a belt or anything extreme though. I can certainly remembers a fair few time being hit and I was born in 1983 (ie> not the days of caning!)

Also had my mouth washed out with fairly liquid (green one - still can't stand smell of it) for swearing at my sister (was about 5 years old I think) also having my head literally banged together with my sisters on xmas eve as was too excited!

Mum is a tad psycho though and dad has zero patience - not as bad as it sounds

I was never hit,smacked or anything
like it and neither was dh.We are mid 40's.
We are very well disciplined so it obviously can be done.
I was one fo 4 kids ..3 brothers .

I grew with being smacked when naughty and also remember my head being cracked open when my Mum threw a slipper at me, remember other things being thrown at me too.

I was hit all the time & had big purple handprints over me as a result. Wasn't seen as that shocking at the time, but now social services would be involved.

I was smacked once by my dad when I was about 5 years old and my mum was so angry and threatened to leave him if it happened again.
I can't remember ever being smacked by my mum.
They smacked my older sisters often and there is a 16 year age gap between me and them. I think my dad was quite violent towards them growing up.

Like custardo, can remember being slapped on the back of the legs age 6 by mother besider herself with worry. - I'd gone running on ahead on a forest trail and got lost, was returned by a hairy lumberjack type.

And was slapped by a nun at school for dropping some stitches in my knitting....

I recall both parents giving out smacks on the legs or bum if me or my sister were naughty, it seemed normal back then. I dont think it affected us in any way now we're adults.
My dh was never hit at all.

My mum never hit/slapped/smacked me that I can remember, but she says that she once smacked me as a toddler as she reached the end of her very long tether. And my bruise (I bruise very easily and very floridly) was a perfect handprint that she had to explain at playgroup the next day.

I can remember my dad smacking me twice - I excuse him on account of his really, really pants childhood

I had a very traumatic childhood and remember often having to lock myself in the bathroom to escape. I don't want to can't remember the details.

My dad never smacked or hit me.

My mother would use the wooden spoon on me. Or a carpet beater. Or a wet leather cloth. Or her hands if she couldn't grab anything else.

Smacked on legs very occasionally by both parents.

Once was having ferocious argument with my brother in the back seat of the car and Mum, who was driving, turned round to slap us to get us to shut up and promptly rear-ended the car in front.

That was quite funny in hindsight, although I don't suppose she thought so at the time.

My dad, never. My mum, a lot, and not so much as a punishment but as an expression of her anger and frustration. The smacking didn't do me as much harm as the verbal abuse though.

My dad did smack me a few times and picked us up and shook us when anry too. Mum was extreemly violent and would punch and slap repeatedly. I do not speak to her at all now and it has affected me greatly.

After a visit to my mother's she rather proudly told the social worker she had only had to hit me the once.

Me, and I'm sorry and ashamed to admit that I have smacked my DS1 .

My mum mostly and like miaou, as an expression of anger and frustration, rather than as punishment, although she hit me with a belt once and the hoover another time (for not lifting my legs so she could hoover under me) and left huge bruises . I suspect that, given what I now know of her and my Dad's relationship back then and how ill she was after I was born, that she had depression.

My dad smacked me a few times when I was a teenager, but I was old enough to see that I was pushing him to the very limits.

I'm determined not to have my DS's childhood marred in quite the same way mine was and feel utterly bereft that I have resorted to the level I have with him on one or two occasions.

oops, no that should say. I wasn't NOT hit, obviously.

no never been hit by either parent and according to my mum who must be wearing glasses with the rosiest of tint my sis or i never had a tantrum that she can recall

we did naughty things but never even as littlies had meltdown tantrum

I was hit all the time, and agree it was the humiliation rather than the pain. I can remember once my stepdad chasing me around the house with a stick, I locked myself in the bathroom shaking with fear for hours and he waited and absolutley leathered me whe I emerged.

I would get hit for being too noisy when I got up in the morning, from the age of 8 I had to get myself up, do breakfast and the hour walk to school. I remember walking home really slow knowing that he would be waiting for me with a stick or belt.

My mum was no better either, she went at me once with a stilleto heel because she thought I had banged a nail into the wall, I hadnt not that that is the point.

I would never ever hit my child and would immediatly leave any man who did.

No, never. I had very few boundaries at all- no curfews for example of no sanctions on how I spent my own money. There was a definite sense of expectation though that we would do the right thing. On the rare occasion that we made the wrong decision, the disappointment our parents felt was truly enough.

My Dad was beaten/ignored/locked under the stairs/criticised/humiliated and swore he would never, ever raise a child that way.

My Mum shouted a couple of times that I remember. My Dad never, ever raised his voice or lost his patience.

I consider myself very lucky.