Dd just had a fallout with dp, who in my opinion was baiting her. I have not said this to dd.
DD then threw a pencil in a tantrum so I sent her to her room to calm down as could see that a big clash with dp was on its way and both are as stubborn as each other.
On the way out of the room she walked over to the cat picked it up and dropped it onto the sofa. I told her she would not be coming down out of her room tonight.
She then screamed in rage all the way upstairs and threw an opened bottle of nail varnish down the stairs. It is now all over the walls and carpet.
When dd calmed down she said she just gets angry and can't help herself.
She has quite scared me as when I am depressed i have rages and she looked and sounded just like me. I feel so guilty that this is my fault.
WE have just moved and have potentially huge financial problems, this will be adding to dd streess not to mention leaving all her extended famikly and friends. Until recently dp and I were also on the verge of splitting up. Her father has also just left her step mother and her stepbrother.
How do you balance punishing what is naughty with undestanding why she is acting this way.