What's the worst piece of advice you have ever been given re parenting?

[grumblingirl]

Mine include:

1. Strapping ds2 into his cot by tying a sheet tightly round the mattress and base so he can't wriggle about at night. My reply 'A bit like a straight jacket for babies eh?'

1. Putting my newborn in a (used) furry soft dog house as a playpen/sleeping basket (offer of 'giving' us the dog house included)

1. Stick a dummy onto LO's face with sticky tape so it doesn't fall out at night - This one was a joke though because I was moaning about lack of sleep (again).

Please tell me I'm not the only one who gets this crackers kind of advice?

Oh, and, from my mother also... 'that child needs a good thrashing - give her summat to cry about'

My sister told me today - 'Dont tickle your dd you will give her a brain haemorrhage'!!

'Babys cry'

themoon66, I know you can't be my sister, because my sister's a bitch, but our mothers may well be twins

Greensleeves... how odd... my sister is also a beetch. We haven't spoken for over 4 years.

You don't hail from West Yorkshire do you?

From MIL after we had a bit of a mad day and coloured ds's nails with felt-tip -

"Don't ever do that again or he'll turn out gay".

He's 20mths fgs, and so what! I get less bad advice and more unwanted interference

I'm buggered if I'm wasting good whisky/brandy on a baby...

"Give her some orange juice and water so she won't want so many feeds"

Grandma-in-law. Why can't I just feed her?

Told by GP to wean ds off breast as solution to mastitis.

He then had to go and check with female GP about my insistence to be prescribed antibiotics.

midwife to me when I was pacing up and down the corridors at 2am with a very windy newborn.

"Just put him down and leave him to cry, babies don't feel pain, he just wants a cuddle, give in now and you'll never hear the end of it!"

I was speechless, as my ds was 5 days old and I could hear the air moving around inside him..

When ds was teething, very young (10 weeks) I was struggling to feed him as his gums were in agony every time he bf. MIL called from golf club dinner, then rang back 10 mins later having chatted to a retired midwife across the table:
'She says your milk's not good any more and that's why he's not feeding. You have to put him on formula.'

Same retired midwife successfully stopped SIL from bf-ing at all by telling her 'well, look at you, you're all stressed about it now - your milk will taste sour. Give him some formula.'
And she did

awayfromhome it was common belief until fairly recently that prem babies didn't feel pain and, as a result, often underwent proceedures with no pain relief or sedation.

I can remember balling my eyes out reading a Sunday Times suppliment article regarding this when my DS had recently been in SCBU.

BTW poppy34 they do not teach 'controlled crying' at mw school (otherwise known as university)!

No, I'm from Stoke

I haven't spoken to my evil sister for 8 years and don't plan to

Oooh, and I did have a paediatrician tell me that if I kept feeding ds1 (bf) at the current rate he would need his stomach stapled

MarmadukeScarlet - I didn't know that I just thought she was mad!! Especially as I went on to ask "what even during injections etc" and she replied with a straight face "Yes"

I got the no tickling line from ex MIL. I was sat on the floor tickling her when she was a few months old and overheard her saying loudly to then dp 'you shouldn't tickle babies it gives them a heart attack'

She was also on the phone to xp for over an hour the day I came out of hospital with dd telling him how I should be bfing dd, basically 5 minutes each side and not again for a couple of hours. At this point dd had been feeding for 2 hours solid and carried on after the phone call!

And when she was down when dd was 1 week old she felt I should leave her to cry in another room so I could sit and eat my dinner in peace.

And so many more in just 8 months, I'm so glad I've only had to see her once in the last 7 years! I wouldn't mindI do feel sorry for xp's new wife though!

anything involving rod for your own back

or your baby should be doing this by now

and esp are you bf that baby again as if its a fecking crime

"Leave him to cry otherwise he'll have you wrapped around his little finger in no time" DS was 2 weeks!

Oh Dh just reminded me of a really bad piece of advice from a HV!

If don't find a way to feed your child formula milk, she will start failing to thrive (on getting DD to feed from bottle as top up for bf, as she was a low birthweight)

"Babies have to cry - it's how they exercise their lungs" - my parents.

Some of xp's recent gems:

If ds wears pink he will turn gay. (Don't ask about the pink, you really don't want to know)

If ds goes without pants his bits will get cold. (Duh. If ds (nearly 7) wants to go commando on a weekend then that is up to him IMO)

Implied at the same time - If DS goes commando he will be a target for paedophiles (no comment)

when ds was going through separation anxiety at 12 months - "ear plugs for you, and leave him to cry all night, it's the only way he'll get over it". No thanks, I don't think him feeling abandoned will make it better actually....

My fave was MiLs - 'it is cruel to give children vegetables, they don't like them and so you shouldn't try'.

DH lives on potatoes, bread and meat in any form, supplemented with a daily carrot and chocolate.

My wonderful MIL suggested we put DS on tamazapam to curb his sleepwalking when he was 3... we did not even have an issue with it!