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The HV is probably on the phone reporting me to social services as we speak.

136 replies

Milkysallgone · 22/07/2008 11:05

Shit. I forgot she was coming. To set the scene....

It is past 10, I am in my nightie and the dcs are still in their PJs looking like grubby little orphans. Dd was having the mother of all tantrums; screaming wildly as though she was being murdered, then the doorbell rings. I had to let the health visitor in to this scene of chaos after having totally forgotten she was coming.

My house is a cesspit. Last nights' chilli is still smeared over the work surfaces, the carpet smells of cheese and I had to fight my way through a sea of dirty nappies which were on their way to the outside bin just to get to the door. We've been on holiday and there are streams of dirty clothes hanging out of the washing machine as well.

God only knows what she must think. I must have looked when I opened the door. Had to run upstairs and fling some jogging bottoms on, while she soaked up the atmosphere. She must have thought I was battering dd the noise she was making.

I am so . Oh - and this is the woman who, when she rang to arrange the visit and said " Your ds is coming up to 2 now isn't he" I replied to her " Oh is he?"!!

She gave me the whole 'I always find if you're having a bad day, it always helps to get outside' speech on the way out. Yes thanks for that.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
WideWebWitch · 22/07/2008 11:34

you hang washing out at 6aM?
I bow before your domestic goddessness

FluffyMummy123 · 22/07/2008 11:34

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FluffyMummy123 · 22/07/2008 11:34

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FioFio · 22/07/2008 11:34

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WideWebWitch · 22/07/2008 11:34

at the weekend sometimes our dishwasher is loaded and unloaded 3 times during the day

mumblechum · 22/07/2008 11:35

Unloaded before 7am?

Truly thou art the Goddess

WideWebWitch · 22/07/2008 11:35

lol at then you brush your hair

Cadbury · 22/07/2008 11:35

i love you fio

FioFio · 22/07/2008 11:35

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FioFio · 22/07/2008 11:36

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WideWebWitch · 22/07/2008 11:38

lol fio at charade

FluffyMummy123 · 22/07/2008 11:39

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SheSellsSeashellsByTheSeashore · 22/07/2008 11:42

haha last time my hv turned up we also forgot that she was coming only i had been ill in bed for two days so our scene looked more like

dd1 had clearly dressed herself and dd2. dd2 had on one of dd1s dresses with her own mismatched tights and dd1 had on one of dd2s vests and a pair of tights three sizes too big, there was cereal and dhs takeaway from the night before all over the living room.

when dd1 let in the hv she (dd2 not the hv)was getting yoghurts from the fridge to feed dd2 and dh and i were on the stairs yelling at each other over the state of living room and how ill i had/had not been!!

hv decided she should come back another day "when every one is feeling better" not one of my finer moments but it was all fine. hv came back laughing about it actually and thought that it was sweet that dd1 would help her daddy care for dd2 while i was ill!

justaboutagrownup · 22/07/2008 11:42

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wahwah · 22/07/2008 11:47

I clean for 24 hours and then travel back in time so I can squeeze a few more hours in, to do any less is sheer slothfulness.

Taxidriver · 22/07/2008 11:48

i drove home with dd to find hv pulling up outside my house, never have i reversed so quickly. she left a note but she knew

FioFio · 22/07/2008 11:49

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Taxidriver · 22/07/2008 11:51
Grin
morningpaper · 22/07/2008 11:54

my Dh does all the washing and tidies the kitchen in the evening while I am pssing around on MN.

I can recommend this system as I find it plays to our strengths

Milkysallgone · 22/07/2008 11:55

Thanks Shesells, that's funny - made me feel a bit better; although I don't have the excuse of being ill, have got a cold does that count?

OP posts:
Booboobedoo · 22/07/2008 11:55

lol at MP.

Milkysallgone · 22/07/2008 11:56

I keep trying that one mp, but dh's standards leave everything to be desired.

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4YorkshireMen · 22/07/2008 11:56

None of you know anything about cleaning - I start cleaning before going to bed, don't stop til after I've woken up and I have 27 children and we eat homecooked gourmet food of 7 courses each for each meal

beanieb · 22/07/2008 11:57

OK - I am scared now. My house is not a palace, it's not picture book, it is messy, it is lived in. When I have a baby will the health visitors really judge me as unfit for having a lived in home?

FluffyMummy123 · 22/07/2008 11:58

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