Weaning 6 month old- but can’t sit up independently

[DoNotLoseHope]

Hi there’s so much advice out there about weaning and I keep seeing little one needs to sit up independently to eat food however my baby doesn’t do this yet and I’ve also heard that some babies don’t sit up without support well into 8 months - I just don’t see myself delaying it till then I have tried to feed her a little here and there to see what response I get and she shuts her mouth tightly shut. When I’m eating she stares at me and starts to move her own mouth. I’ve contacted health visitor they said to hold off till she can sit up but she is so hungry and increasing her milk day by day
I’ve tried to mix banana and her formula to give a similar taste but she didn’t enjoy it
she has good head control

We started weaning at 6 months exactly. DS wasn't sitting up independently, he still needed support. We put some towels around him in the high chair to help him and we also leaned it back a tiny bit. He could sit but just not quite well enough or for long enough, which is normal.

I'd say crack on. The longer you leave it, the harder weaning will be.

We did a mix of purees and finger food. I always offered purees plus a bit of broccoli or sweet potato or steak, whatever was left over from the purees. As soon as he ate the puree, i moved to more textured purees and at about 7.5/8 months he was eating proper food. You don't want to linger with purees too long, so they don't get used to just smooth food.

I still offered fingers foods until about 1 as he enjoyed it and then I didn't make the effort anymore, he ate whatever we ate.

Generally some babies don’t sit completely independently until 8 months but most babies sit well enough in a supportive high chair at around 6 months. The 6 months guide doesn’t mean you need to start bang on 6 months if they need a couple more weeks to get a bit steadier at sitting in a high chair. I’d listen to the health visitors and wait a couple of weeks.

I have a 2.5 year old & a nearly 1 year old, the advice has always been (in my experience) that they don’t need to sit totally independently but they need to be able to stay in a sitting position & hold their head steady. If your baby can’t sit in a high chair without slouching or needs you to physically hold them upright then they are not ready.

It’s not sitting independently, like on the floor, it’s being able to sit safely in a high chair or on your lap without falling over. The guidance is from a safety perspective.

A 4 month old who slumps over in the high chair is at risk of choking.

A 6 month old who can sit in a high chair for 10 minutes safely with some back support from a pillow can eat safely.

Do that every mealtime or sit her on your lap while you eat. Give her bits of what you’re eating to pick up and try. Don’t try to force it. She’ll get the hang of it eventually, but it doesn’t happen overnight. It takes weeks and really months of practice.

The high chairs I’ve been looking at all say only use if baby can sit independently, do you guys have any recommendations
I was really excited for weaning thinking it’ll be so fun and she’ll get to try so many different foods but my biggest challenge is her actually wanting to eat

don't worry at this point whether she is eating much or any. I recently watched a video of my nearly 3 year old when we first offered solids. the food is everywhere. possibly none made it into his mouth. that's fine and normal.

My 4 DC are all adults now so very dated imformation. DD1 was 9wks ols when weaned and DD 2 was 11wks old. They were both nearly 10lb at birth and health visitor and doctors told me to wean. DS1 was 4.5 mths old and DS2 was closer to 6mths old. None could sit unaided and I use to feed either on my lap or in car seat. DS had a chunky highchair that could lay back very padded. Feeding also wasn't lead by baby. Im not suggesting this way was correct in anyway just saying how things change. If I was you id offer a little bit of things and build up slowly.

Use your judgment, if she can sit with a bit of help, it's fine.

And yeah lots of mums are excited about weaning. I was SO excited. It turns out it's so much fucking work and if you don't have a good eater, it's unbelievably stressful!

When i started weaning my youngest at 6 months he wouldn't eat anything at all. He just didn't want to. He only started eating properly at around 12 months, now he's 18 months he eats like a horse and still has breastmilk. Try not to worry, she'll get there in the end.

30 years ago you weaned at 3 months so the sitting up didn't make a difference to start weaning.

I would definitely just wait a few weeks - what's the rush? And also drastically reduce your expectations, a lot of babies will just hold/smear food around for a while before anything goes into their mouth or down their throat. Both of mine weren't difficult to wean but it took weeks before they were actually eating anything.

A high chair that has shoulder straps as well as a lap strap offers a bit more support, and also helps keep them contained when they get older and want to climb out. If you have a bumbo or similar seat they can be good to start with if they can't sit independently, just make sure it's on the floor! I used to put DS in it and sit on the floor opposite him, but he is now 14 so my advice may be out of date.

At this stage don’t worry too much, some babies take a while to get used to solid food and they don’t just suddenly want to eat a 3 course meal as soon as they turn 6 months.

The fact that she is interested when you eat is good. You should build on that, put her near you in a high chair when you eat, or have her sitting on your lap. If appropriate give her some from your plate to try.
Just go gradually, if she doesn’t eat much it doesn’t matter at the moment.
Any type of high chair with a proper harness should be fine, with a cushion behind her for now for extra support

Our high chairs say the same but we just support them in it. Give soft finger flood for her to focus on, she might prefer that to being fed with a spoon. With DC1 she fed herself by hand from the beginning. I eventually threw all the porridge type food away. She only allowed ice cream to be fed to her in the summer!

I’m thinking to get snug floor seat from mamas and papas as it’s suitable from 3 months and I can put the food infront of her and just let her explore. I saw my Healthvisitor today bless her I think she’s out of training because the advice she was going was so conflicting to the best start in life Nhs guidance - she told me to reduce her milk to make her hungrier so she would actually eat. I just don’t think that’s fair as it’s her main nutrition. She also said she should be on meals by now and to give her everything I eat. You guys are so helpful I’m going to get this seat and just let her play with the food and if it manages to make it to her mouth - amazing if not I won’t be putting pressure on it ( will be highkey stressing inside tho 🤣 ) plus the website also states baby should be having meals at 7-9 months so I am really hoping by 9 months we should have made some sort of progress to meals
still find it crazy that i was fed baby food from ages 3-4 months, lucky for my mum i opened my mouth and ate it

I felt the same what’s the rush but now my health visitor said I’ll miss the weaning window if I don’t succeed and may end up with a very fussy eater

Yeah your health visitor is behind the times and then some!!

The ikea inflatable high chair cushions are brilliant for this. They fit in other high chairs too and are useful to deflate and take to restaurants. We found that sitting in the high chair just for a few seconds at first then building up helped DS get stronger. He liked sitting in there and it gave us a chance to eat our dinner unmolested!

Sitting independently is a 9 month milestone and therefore is not required for weaning, which it’s recommended to start at around 6 months. For weaning they need to be able to stay in a seated position with decent head control e.g. in a high chair. It’s honestly fine to use any high chair that baby is comfy in, just don’t leave them unsupervised in it or anything. And I wouldn’t buy a floor seat because firstly pointless waste of money and I personally think it’s important to include them in family meals as early as possible.

This is mad advice in my view!! I've always been told 'food before one is just for fun'. In the sense that milk is their main source of nutrition and that exposure to food isn't suppose to replace milk but be more supplementary, getting them used to different tastes and textures, developing their oral skills etc. I'd follow NHS guidance over what this HV has told you. My local childrens centre/family hub has a really helpful, free weaning workshop, there might be one around you?

Ah ok I’ll go straight to high chair instead as I doubt she’d even want to be in this seat for long. I thought so too but my HV also was trying to refer me to physio for not being able to sit up but I know it isn’t a physio issue so just said I’ll check in again in one months time 🫠

This was at the children’s centre. They do an online course which I’ve attended and I’m being put in touch with a nursery nurse which can hopefully give more tailored weaning advise that is up to date

I've weaned 5 of my own babies and we started with each by just sitting them on an adult lap at meal times and letting them join in.
Make meals a sociable occasion, no stress, let them hold and try a bit of food.

Crikey, I agree with others that your HV is giving quite mad advice. I have 2 kids and never seen a single thing about 'the weaning window' and any evidence linking it to fussy eating. I used Solid Starts when weaning mine and found their advice really helpful, on readiness, how to serve, introducing allergens etc: https://solidstarts.com/articles/readiness/

I did pay for the app but they give loads of good info for free, and on instagram.

Best of luck, I really don't think waiting a few weeks is going to hugely disadvantage your baby, but I know it's difficult with conflicting advice out there!

I’ve never heard of this. Neither of mine could sit up at 6 months they were too busy crawling, and I weaned both at 6 months in a high chair.