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Original poster

How do you deal with your children when they throw things at you when you are driving the car?

56 replies

QuintessentialShadows · 01/07/2008 11:49

It is dangerous and really distracting. My children are 6 and 3.

I have sent them to bed with a promise to cut their favourite soft toys to piecese next time they do it.

It is maddening. And my temper raising, when they do it is just an added dangerous factor.

I cant believe a six year old can be so stupid. And him doing it is setting a bad example to our 3 year old.

On saturday, I was driving in 70 mph and he threw my big flowery scarf in my face.

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mishymoo · 01/07/2008 11:50

It's not easy is it! How about not letting them have anything in the back with them for a few trips until they understand that they are not allowed to throw things at you especially when you are driving!

nervousal · 01/07/2008 11:52

I have been known to stop the car and threaten to make dd walk home - obviously wouldn't work on Motorway (which is where I'm assumming you were doing 70?)

Original poster
QuintessentialShadows · 01/07/2008 11:52

I had done that today, after a soft dog came flying. Then my youngest managed to find a big pebble!

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cornsilk · 01/07/2008 11:54

I used stop the car and threaten to chuck them out. (never actually did of course)Now ds1 calls my bluff and says' Fine, let me out then.'

oopsadaisyangel · 01/07/2008 11:55

DS used to take great delight at taking his shoes off and throwing them at the back of my head.

egypt · 01/07/2008 11:56

you'll have to threaten them that if they do it again they will have NOTHING in their possession to throw, then carry it out.

AttillaTheHan · 01/07/2008 11:56

I would take all toys etc off them as another poster suggested. I have also turned off ds's cd's and put on radio 4 or classic fm for ten minutes as an immediate consequence of his actions when he has done the same. I suppose the impact of this depends on whether or not your kids are cultured and they actually like classic fm...

stitch · 01/07/2008 11:57

you stop, and dont move until the promise not to do it
or you chuck them out of the car
or, if it is safe to do so, an emergency stop usually scares the living daylights out of them

far better that, than a traffic accident

KerryMum · 01/07/2008 11:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

eenybeeny · 01/07/2008 11:59

wow I didnt know children even did this but it sounds very common! My DS is only 22 months so I see I still have it to look forward to!

Buda · 01/07/2008 12:00

DS did that twice. Both times I shouted at him very loudly for a long time. And then pulled in where safe and shouted again. Don't care how much I scared him really. Better than an accident.

Original poster
QuintessentialShadows · 01/07/2008 12:27

I opened up the window and held said soft toydog out of it and said NEXT time it goes..... They were squeeling with terror.

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FruitfulOfFruit · 01/07/2008 12:31

Stop car. Get book out of glove compartment. Sit and read it until a small worried voice says "sorry mummy". That's on my calm efficient days. On other days, shout a lot for a long time.

Usually have to do this for seatbelt removal rather than throwing things.

FruitfulOfFruit · 01/07/2008 12:32

If they throw things at home I put them on a high visible shelf and they don't get them back till the next day. That works.

shrinkingsagpuss · 01/07/2008 12:33

fruitfuloffruit - sounds familiar. Thats my tactic for seatbelt removal too.

For thrown toys -DON"T GIVE THEM MISSILES!!

For "I don't want to go to...." - stop car, open childs door, tell them to get out, and make like you are going to drive off. Works a treat..... don't actually drive off though - I think that's illegal.

OrmIrian · 01/07/2008 12:33

Pull over, slam the brakes on and shout at them. Threaten that you will put them out and leave them. That also goes for too much noise, fighting and generally making the business of driving too dangerous.

Original poster
QuintessentialShadows · 01/07/2008 12:35

I did wonder about slamming the breaks, but you cant really do that on the motorway, or other places where you cant stop the car?

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shrinkingsagpuss · 01/07/2008 12:36

threatening with police usually works on my DS too - "If you take your setabelt off, A policeman will stop us and tell you off, or arrest you". Then got tame policeman to re-iterate. Mind you, DS was terrified each time a police car came past us for AGES!!

scattyspice · 01/07/2008 12:37

I get very shouty and confiscate item.

OrmIrian · 01/07/2008 12:38

Oh I always find a layby first. Not sure that 'Now look what you made mummy do' as an artic ploughs into us might not be a little OTT.

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QuintessentialShadows · 01/07/2008 12:42

Cant threaten with the police. Too many family member is in the police. Although, you dont find them out in traffic! Usually wearing normal clothes, only one wears a uniform. She is on the bike squad! We once made the mistake of mentioning the police coming to take away the intruder who set the alarm off.

  1. It turned out to be daddy, and my son was hysterical the police would take him away
  2. Next time he saw his auntie (who came to give him her Lego Police station lego set, he hid under the table and started howling.

So police threats, not the done thing in the QS household.

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Psychomum5 · 01/07/2008 12:44

try and explain to them what could happen.....not in a scary way (well, unless it continues), but as calmly as possible.

mine used to do this, until we were involved in an accident, and since then, if they start to maybe play up, play with toys, argue, I ask them to think about how the accident could have ended up if they had been behaving like that on the day of the accident.....makes them think!!

of course, we have a time and place that they can think of (sadly), but it is working, and my youngest is five, so he can understand cause and effect.

you must get them to stop this, as you really do not want an accident (obviously, you would not be asking otherwise, and IMO, you use any tactic possible (well, not wade in with the scary, but also, not gentle either as that won;t sink in).

I am certain that many accidents on the roads would not happen if there were not kiddies in the car....I know how much they distract me at time!!!

good luck

cece · 01/07/2008 12:48

Oh my 7 year old threw a car at me yesterday in the car. It is the first time she has done it... Missed me and hit the dashboard.

Anyway, I was so cross. I pulled the car over to side of road. Got out and slammed my door shut. Stomped around car pulled her door over and I must admit I shouted a lot at her about how dangerous and silly it was. She looked rather taken aback as I never shout! I then slammed her door shut. Stomped around and got in the car again. Slammed my door shut and then turned around did a bit more of a shout and then drove off.

Goodness knows what anyone thought who saw me

However, judging by the look on her face she won't do it again.

What really added to it was my 4 year old piping in as we drove off
"I never throw things in the car do I mummy?"

ummadam · 01/07/2008 13:28

my DS is only 5m so this may be a stupid idea but.

Start with no easily accesible toys etc to throw. If they throw shoes etc then stop car and take shoes off.... then tell them that if they throw anything else you will strip them down to their pants (it is summer afterall)and they can travel naked in the car until they learn not to throw things.

shrinkingsagpuss · 01/07/2008 13:40

like it. like it a lot!!!!