Ex pays £350 for five children and expects me to provide food

[Bonjovirocks123]

Ex gives £350 for 5 kids but gets £1000 benefits
So i have 5 kids with my ex he gives me £350 a month for them so £70 for each child he its homeless at momemt but still gets £1000 in benefits he see them 4 times a week most offen its at my house becaues he blows his money he thinks on his days he see the kids at my house that i should have to supply the food for the kids because thats what i get paid off him for and why i get child benefit its this right? I cant help but feel like he talking the piss its a stuggle already

Can you point out where it says the op has no job? It’s perfectly possible for a stock broker, barrister or similar to fall into addiction and end up homeless. We can all see from how the world works that it’s the billionaires of this world that are the real ‘pond life’ anyway.

I honestly can't tell what point your trying to make. You've gone from calling him a loser to now saying he still shows up for his kids ..... I was just pointing out that maybe he's on benefits due to a disability or health condition 🤷‍♀️ as your typical "loser" on benefits doesn't receive 1000pm

Is he homeless due to recently separating from you OP?

A lot of things don't add up.

THIS

What point are you trying to make ?

This sounds complicated. In the short term, you could cook something cheap like a big pan of pasta with passata or a tomato based sauce, plus whatever cheap veggies the kids will eat.

How does he claim benefits if homeless? Where is he living? Could he see the kids in a family contact centre instead of at your house? There’s no easy solution as you are both struggling, but I hope you are getting all the support you can.

I was just pointing out that maybe he's on benefits due to a disability or health condition 🤷‍♀️ as your typical "loser" on benefits doesn't receive 1000pm

🤦‍♀️

I completely agree! She sounds absolutely insufferable. There could be a really good reason why he’s out of work and homeless, he sounds like a great dad who’s really trying to do right by his kids. I can’t believe what I’m reading! She takes £350 out of his £1k whilst he’s homeless and potentially disabled (due to the amount), he sees the children 4 days a week and she expects him to feed them on those days too! Lunatic! If this is real, I’d pay big money to hear his side.

Some do, some don't. It's quite difficult to work, especially full-time, if you have sole charge of children. Even if a woman isn't in paid work, if she's looking after her own children that's a damn sight more than the bloke who fucked off because he "felt overwhelmed" or whatever is doing. And this is exactly my point; if deadbeat men aren't mugging off their ex-partners, theyre mugging off the taxpayer, and it shouldn't be allowed.

Reported, suspect the poster can be found lurking under a bridge

OP isn’t coming back. Rage bait at the end of the school holidays

How is he getting £1000 a month, this must be from disability benefits?

UC is about £300 a month per person.
You can get housing costs on top of that but if he’s homeless then he doesn’t have any housing costs so will only be entitled to the £300.

If he’s getting disability benefits then I doubt CMS will take that part into account, as they are there for his disability.

How long have you been broken up?

Because

• he's ill and unable to work
• he lacks skills to get a job
• noone will employ someone whos homeless
• he'll have less money if he works

The issue isn't who's right or wrong or how much he provides whilst being homeless, the issue is he's in a mess and needs to sort that out pronto. He needs somewhere to live even if it's shared accomodation. If he's on benefits his rent should be covered.

Is £70 not enough for food and essentials for each child?

Do you work? Is that the challenge? That your costs are so high with 5 kids that £70pcm per kid doesn't even touch the cost of childcare?

You need to give us more @Bonjovirocks123 so we can help you worth through this.

There is now law to say you have to go though CMS (or whatever it’s called now), you can have a private arrangement. and some parents do have their child’s best interest at heart and don’t just want to give the minimum they can.

Why? Is no one in the country allowed to have a hard time?

Just feed your kids. Might not be fair in an ideal world but the whole situation seems completely unfair on the children who could not help being born into this disfunction.

Having children doesn't stop either party from working!!

Having a hard time is one thing, but having five children when you can't even house yourself is another.

Half term innit.

None at all

He may be paying that by choice? Not all fathers have to be forced to pay via CMS.

Ordinarily i’d say he should provide food, but given he doesn’t actually need to pay much more than £7 as he’s on benefits and homeless, YABU. That’s a lot out of his benefits, and yes they are his children so should pay for them, but if he challenged this if you start making demands you’ll get next to nothing.

she didn’t say that he had been made to pay £350. If it went to CMS he certainly wouldn’t be paying that, but some fathers do want to pay for their kids so make private arrangements.

I don’t remember OP saying they had the kids AFTER he became homeless..? Did I miss something?

You can not be going down the official channels for cms. Because he would actually only have to pay you £28 a month as he is claiming benefits.

You Seem to be wanting fairness but £350 a month is not fair considering his incomings and situation. Then add the child benefit you will get for 5 children. And actually child maintenance only consider 3 children in their calculations. I have 5 children with my ex husband and it falls into the ‘3 or more’ category so yes all 5 children are on the claim but they take the amount for 3 children then divide that amount between 5.

I think child maintenance needs to be fair for both parties and this seems very unfair on your ex with regards to how much he is paying based on his income/benefits. I understand the struggles but you can’t complain about unfairness and not take into account whether it’s fair both sides.