Who allows their child to use TikTok?

[BatsInSummer]

I've never understood why anyone would.
The very premise makes it so dangerous for kids. They only have one childhood.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c708v7qkeg1o

Why shouldn't they? We have all our friends and family on there. My kid likes to see their updates on the way to school.

My kids don't spend a lot of time in their bedrooms or just sitting around at home. They have devices that they use and they can use them anywhere. Younger have a tablet. Older have phones and laptops.

You haven't answered my question. You don't have to of course but if there is nothing to feel embarrassed of.. just wondering from what age you allowed them full internet and social media access.
They obviously do spend SOME time in their bedrooms...
Do the younger take their tablets up there with full internet and SM access and do the older take their phones up there with the same? I'm just gauging what protections you do have in place because I imagine you have at least some boundaries around it. Not many people have zero parental control over an 8 year old with the internet.

Doesn't your kid have all the friends and family on their own insta account?

No... they don't have their own accounts until they are 13 or whatever it is. They may be logged into mine on their device though before that.

I have very basic parental controls on the web but honestly they sometimes block me from searching midwifery related stuff I need to see so I turn it off.

So they have pretty much unfettered access to the Internet wherever they want in the house. They tend to use ny social media accounts until they are teens and then they open their own. I actually only have one that is old enough to have their own.

But as I said, my kids aren't at home "screening" much. They're usually eating or sleeping or watching the TV in the living room with others. They all tend to do their homework at school, too.

Just makes more sense since they have wraparound style care.

So you allow teens unfettered SM and internet access, and the younger ones unfettered internet access but no SM?
No SM accounts til 13? Up thread you say you don't impose any limits at all, but that is imposing a limit.
What age do you give the younger ones unfettered internet access? @LoftyRobin

Ah but you have basic parental controls via your internet provider. That blocks out a lot of nasties. So, that's not unfettered.
It doesn't go far enough, but it's not 'no limits'.

I don't impose that limit. I think you can't sign up.until that age and that's why I let them access mine. Any reason they could have to make one (including using the sign in for online games) is covered by them having access to mine.

I don't think it does block much because sometimes I can see some raunchy stuff with an Internet search, but not actually academic stuff. It blocks the wrong things/sites know how to get around those.

Thats the thing. These companies actively want children to look at this stuff. They find ways around controls. That's why I take the approach that I do. I think that's best in the long term.

It’s really sad! As an adult who has never been on Tik Tok, X, instagram, Snap Chat or even WhatsApp, I rarely use YouTube…have I missed something. My 14 year old DGD has a Samsung.

She does not have access to SM but because the majority of her friends do she is fed content through them. She tells me everything, because grandma loves the “tea” (is that term outdated now?) And some of it is hair raising.

She actually told me about the shooting of Charlie Kirk, I said do you know who he is, she said no but all my friends do. Fair enough.

Her best friend said to her the other day about school “oh this is boring. I wish I was at home in my bed on my phone”. Fair enough!

Many of her friends support TRA. And this is not open to debate!

She says her friends are on their phones all the time and spend all lot of time in their rooms on their phones.

For those parents that do allow their children access to these apps, can you honestly say that your 9,10,11 children have not seen things that are inappropriate.

I am a full user of the internet, I have many news app, use digital content daily, shop on line all of the useful things the internet provides.
I have full contact with family and friends. I just don’t get the thrill of SM.

It's very sad that your shutting down debate with a young girl who should be taught the value of free speech and having an open mind. Debate is healthy, especially without the safety of the family unit, where you can test ideas and be tested. We need our young women to have the skill of debate for their futures.
I don't agree with TRA either but if my children held views that didn't align with mine, I'd rather we could challenge through intellect rather than just shut them down and say 'its not open to debate.'

You do know the shooting of Charlie Kirk was covered by all major news outlets, including newsround. It's not something exclusive to social media 🤦‍♀️

I am sorry @TartanMammy, I didn’t make it clear. When I said “And this is not open for debate”, I sadly meant among her friends. This is what she feels and this is what she has told me.

She and I do discuss and debate, I promise you! So there is no need for you to be sad about the possibility of me shutting down debate on any matters with my DGD. It is wonderful that we can have this level of conversation.

No. No phone til secondary when walking or bus without a parent.
Had to speak to a parent whom allowed their dd (8) to have phone in bedroom to take videos of them dancing and upload them onto sm. Stopped dd going there as the mum didn't see the issue. Didn't even occur to me it could happen.

Ds not bothered with his phone unless he needs it to pay, make a call, chat to his mates to arrange something.

Dd - lots of peer pressure, fomo, backed off nagging when her friend got stalked online and then scarily in real life.

Dd uses it for make up tips, fashion, extra research on topics, like another poster is really interested in the tudor period :) but we have a rule, no phones upstairs, no phones before school, no phones after 9pm.

I just said it's not about them, it's not about trust it's about the people that mean them harm, and you can't unsee stuff! Or avoid being tracked, cookies, analysed without permission.

Exactly as I said - it should’ve been locked down. However parents need to be parenting. This is just lazy parenting. You don’t know what they’re seeing - much worse than a spliff.

Exactly as I said - it should’ve been locked down. However parents need to be parenting. This is just lazy parenting. You don’t know what they’re seeing - much worse than a spliff.

No phone, no Snapchat, no WhatsApp - but a life! Yes to saying no!

We held out until 13, then allowed it with strict boundaries. The self-regulation was better than I expected—total ban had backfired before.

Key was setting rules together beforehand. They actually suggested
stricter limits than I would have.

We use something to enforce the agreed time so I'm not the constant negotiator. Not perfect, but removes the daily battle.

10yo? No way. 13 with supervision and ongoing conversations is our line.