I saw someone pointing fingers at my DD

[TheMaryClaire]

Hi Mums! I just want to get this off my chest and maybe get some advice from you all.

My daughter and I went to this restaurant (i don't want to mention the name) over the weekend and had some dinner there. Of course, as a child, my DD has a really short attention span, so after watching some videos, she started wandering around the restaurant hall and waving at all the people coming in.

Some people appreciate it and smile at her, so I just let her move around. Suddenly, a lady (around 50 yo) started stopping her and pointing a finger at her, saying that she should not be running around the restaurant.

While I know that she's right, I feel that it's not appropriate to point your fingers at someone else's child. I just apologise to her and walk away with my daughter in tow but I feel extremely uncomfortable in my heart.

What do you think?

and also in the docs waiting room which is full of sick people, I always made my kids sit in a chair quietly and not become a pest

I hate going out for a meal and watching a parent happily eat contentedly while little Caliugla is causing mayhem, interrupting other people's meals, or almost getting scolded by servers. The general public isn't there to be your childcare!

I don’t blame people for pointing. Your child should not be walking around a restaurant annoying people trying to eat their meal. Other people shouldn’t have to tolerate your poorly behaved child. Maybe you need to practice keeping her seated at home before you take her out to restaurants. Also it’s not that people don’t mind what she did, it’s more that they’re just being polite in putting up with it.

😃

The OP is never coming back to this thread

Urgh. I hate when we are out for a meal and some random child comes up to the table and starts talking to us and parents don’t intervene. It’s not cute or lovely; it’s fucking annoying. I don’t want to spend my nice meal out talking to someone else’s child.

Take some colouring or something if your child can’t stay in their seat.

Pointing is a lot less rude than letting your kid wander round a restaurant waving at people. HTH

Depends if child is 5 or 15 😂

A bit rude pointing a finger but I would have had a word with you as there are people carrying hot drinks and hot foods in a restaurant and there are drinks and food on the tables that could be spilled, knocked off, etc. DD or customer or member of staff could knock off or drop the drinks and food on your child or customer if they get under their feet or they trip over them.

I think the same - word for word.

Takes a village

So what if she pointed? You shouldn't let your child wander around a restaurant, it's unsafe for the serving staff who carry hot food and drinks. If your child won't sit at the table, then you leave.

You are massively inconsiderate to let your daughter wander around bothering people who are trying to enjoy a meal. Do your job or don't take her out until she's older and able to sit still. What an imposition.

This can only be improved if you tell us she was watching videos with the audio on.

Good LORD.

Unless it was her middle finger, I don’t understand why your heart feels sad

No children should be wandering around restaurants. Take her home if she can’t sit in a restaurant. Have you not noticed other children are able to sit down? Interrupting other diners is not on either. And the staff shouldn’t have to serve round your child because you can’t parent.

And it doesn’t matter if it’s Pizza Express etc, same applies to any restaurant or cafe

How many fingers did the woman point at your dd? Thread title suggests multiple fingers, but the text of your post says one.

Pointing one finger sounds acceptable in the circumstances but two or more is overly emphatic, especially if both hands were involved.

Maybe if you parented your child instead of, I assume, smiling indulgently at her this wouldn't have happened.

Yes, this.
Sorry, OP, but as someone who has waitressed and who is a frequent customer in restaurants, a wandering child is a menace.

I couldn’t tell you how many times I have tripped or nearly tripped over a loose child whilst carrying hot food or a tray of drinks. We, as staff, got the dirty looks for bumping into a wandering child in a place built for sitting down and eating!
We also had children edge towards the main doors, hoping to get outside… they would have to cross the in / out road before reaching the car park 😮 I went out and brought back a little boy who had escaped, and took him back to his Mummy… who gave me the filthiest look!

As a customer, if I’m paying my money to go out and eat, I don’t want to be “entertained” by someone else’s child, roaming, or worse - running - around. Eating out is not cheap anymore, I’d like to enjoy it…peacefully.

We supplied colouring books and crayons, high chairs and reading books, to help keep children sat down and occupied.

I suspect OP is one of those parents who also allows her daughter to watch the video with no headphones so that everyone else had to have their meal ruined by the sound in addition to ‘appreciating’ the kid wondering around the restaurant. Sort your child’s attention span out OP - she should only be in a restaurant if she can sit quietly for the whole meal without disturbing any other tables.

What do I think? If this is a serious post, you need to GET A GRIP.

Take responsibility for your child in public and realise that of all the things that might happen to her, an adult "pointing a finger" at her is right down the bottom of the 'Things to get uppity and post on Mumsnet' about.

Maybe try parenting?

Was the lady possibly pointing towards the seat the child should have been sitting in and suggesting she return to it? You mention both wandering and running. If your daughter was actually running around in a restaurant, allowing that to happen was hugely negligent on your part.

Believe me nobody appreciated it ...

Am I too late for the fun? 👉
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