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Original poster

Human rights health visitor

788 replies

Erlisk · 09/05/2025 20:08

I have seen it here before but the posts are old. Before my baby was born i told my midwife (UK) that i did not want any visits at home. I just like my privacy and want to be able to decide who enters my home. They offer visits as a service so i just decided to not let them in. I was happy to go for appointments.

Then in the hospital when the baby was born, they told me "someone was going to come into my house even if i do not want that". I kept saying no. They kept saying they just wanted to see where the baby would sleep etc. i said no. Then the midwifes came to the door and i told them i did not want them in my house. So they reported me to social services. Social services called me and threatened with official investigation if i do not let the midwifes and later health visitor in my house. Also for the one year visit.

I texted them many times i did not want. I also told them in person. So i have a lot of proof. Ok long story short i let them in.because they threatened with social services investigation = trying to take your baby. I had to let them in, they said everything was fine, and closed the case. But instead of bonding with my baby i was stressed that they were trying to take her away.

So. It is ten months ago so the one year visit is coming and I DO NOT WANT THEM IN MY HOUSE. So i decided to go after them. And yes, it is human rights violation. It is not normal in civilised countries that someone comes to your house without your consent and without a warrant. If you do not let them in they basically threaten to take your baby.

I am not looking for the comments that they are just helping etc. I am not interested in that 😉. What i am looking for here is other moms who went after them. I am researching where to complain. I am also making a list of solicitors who would help me. And maybe some group court case? I will make complaint to NHS. I believe we only have one year for this kind of thing so only people who experienced this last year. Or if you went through going to court and have a good no win no fee lawyer (London or Kent). They are violating human rights you everyone so no, i will not let it go.

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 09/05/2025 21:21

It’s confusing that you feel you missed out on bonding with your baby because of your conflict about this yet you’re perusing more angst and a fruitless legal battle which will distract you further from enjoying your baby.

maythefirce · 09/05/2025 21:23

We just said no, and nobody ever showed up.
No consequences, no social service referrals, nothing

Original poster
Erlisk · 09/05/2025 21:23

Dreichweather · 09/05/2025 20:13

Complain about the NHS for making a factual report to SS?

I have just requested the info (access to my information). They should send me the records so it will be easier to dispute. Especially if they actually wrote that they made the referral because i refused the home visit.

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
Original poster
Erlisk · 09/05/2025 21:25

vodkaredbullgirl · 09/05/2025 20:33

Good luck

Thanks

OP posts:
AliBaliBee1234 · 09/05/2025 21:25

You can try 'going after them' but I doubt you'll get anywhere. They have a duty of care and your extreme reaction understandably sparked concern.

AliBaliBee1234 · 09/05/2025 21:27

SS got involved because of a refusal for post birth midwife visits which are really important. Think that's why this has been more dramatic than others who don't wish to see a HV.

Babyboomtastic · 09/05/2025 21:28

How do you manage with other visitors to your home? In a few years school will often want to do a home visit before you start. Then there's a child wanting playdates, parents either staying or dropping them off. It's not feasible to keep your house entirely private and will be stifling on your child as they grow.

I tuck your recurring to this is OTT, and given that you think mandatory drug testing should be used, rehab is fast more invasive, your reluctance for a home visit raises even more red flags.

AliBaliBee1234 · 09/05/2025 21:28

Erlisk · 09/05/2025 21:10

Exactly, i think it is not acceptable. They can see the baby at their clinic. Why do they push so hard to invade the privacy of your home? This feels more like Russia or China because they do not respect human rights. I think people would win at The European Court of Human Rights with this.
And yes, i want to change it. There are other ways to make sure that children are safe. For example i would be for drug/alcohol testing. Those are the parents who are an actual danger to their children.

Show quote history

With all due respect, some babies are living in dire conditions and without home visits they may slip through the net.

I can't understand why anyone would be this frustrated about a check that's in place to keep everyone safe.

What if abusers and unfit parents just simply declined?

CalmFawn · 09/05/2025 21:29

I’ve opted out of the health visitor service. I did it when my 2nd child was 2 months old and haven’t seen her at all for my third. I just didn’t see it beneficial.

I did see the midwife though and attended clinic for them go be weighed/ vaccinated.

I just wrote an email saying the service wasn’t for me after a bad experience. I did tell them my child is in a setting (nursery) and is up to date with vaccinations so if they have concerns they could contact them. It was a very nice email and they followed up with a call. I explained my reasons, they were happy and give me the contact details if I change my mind! All very positive really. Is it the way you’ve declined visits that has set of red flags??

Gilead · 09/05/2025 21:30

I have just requested the info (access to my information). They should send me the records so it will be easier to dispute. Especially if they actually wrote that they made the referral because i refused the home visit.
It won’t be easier to dispute. It will say Mother is not engaging. It will then in all likelihood state that mother is quite aggressive regarding engagement with the service. At this point it becomes a safeguarding issue. It doesn’t matter what you think, the law is on the side of your child, Any charge brought by you will never see the light of day.
I have run this past a family member who is a barrister.
I would like to gently suggest you engage with a professional counsellor, who may help with your bonding issues and other concerns you may have.

Dreichweather · 09/05/2025 21:30

Erlisk · 09/05/2025 21:23

I have just requested the info (access to my information). They should send me the records so it will be easier to dispute. Especially if they actually wrote that they made the referral because i refused the home visit.

Show quote history

Did you not refuse a visit?
Or do you think they made a referal for a different reason?

I’m a bit confused by this post.

BellissimoGecko · 09/05/2025 21:33

Christ, let it go. The purpose of the visit is to safeguard children. To ensure they have a bed and are being looked after. It’s for the benefit of children.

CwmYoy · 09/05/2025 21:33

The health and safety of your child is far more important than your hissy fit. Grow up.

Original poster
Erlisk · 09/05/2025 21:34

Marcusparkus · 09/05/2025 21:11

Few people on here seem to understand the basis of law. If there is any suspicion that the OP's baby is in danger, the authorities are duty bound to investigate. There appears to be no grounds for them to do so and the OP is perfectly within her rights to refuse access to her home. She has agreed to attend appointments although again, unless there is a health need, she is not obliged to do so.

The length of the visit or whether the health visitor is nice or not is neither here nor there. I don't want the state in my home uninvited either, OP. They have no place in my bedroom. As for keeping children safe...the state's record on this suggests it's not a strong point regardless of how many homes they pry into.

Exactly. I will talk to some solicitors and see. Citizen Advice agrees all these services are optional is and they cannot use threats to enter people's homes just because they do not want them to and that "raises concern". But Citizens Advice cannot actually do anything.

OP posts:
SD1978 · 09/05/2025 21:37

Your baby’ has a human right to a safe environment. You’re not going to get people to blindly agree with you, doesn’t work like that.

Hedonism · 09/05/2025 21:38

Erlisk · 09/05/2025 21:10

Exactly, i think it is not acceptable. They can see the baby at their clinic. Why do they push so hard to invade the privacy of your home? This feels more like Russia or China because they do not respect human rights. I think people would win at The European Court of Human Rights with this.
And yes, i want to change it. There are other ways to make sure that children are safe. For example i would be for drug/alcohol testing. Those are the parents who are an actual danger to their children.

Show quote history

Right, so you'd be ok with them testing you for drugs and alcohol, but not popping into your house to check that your baby has a safe place to sleep?

Gogo509 · 09/05/2025 21:38

Erlisk · 09/05/2025 21:34

Exactly. I will talk to some solicitors and see. Citizen Advice agrees all these services are optional is and they cannot use threats to enter people's homes just because they do not want them to and that "raises concern". But Citizens Advice cannot actually do anything.

Show quote history

I wish you and your child the very best. Again all I have to say on this matter is any health visitor visiting my home has only had my child's interest at heart. This is what matters.

MmeChoufleur · 09/05/2025 21:40

Erlisk · 09/05/2025 21:10

Exactly, i think it is not acceptable. They can see the baby at their clinic. Why do they push so hard to invade the privacy of your home? This feels more like Russia or China because they do not respect human rights. I think people would win at The European Court of Human Rights with this.
And yes, i want to change it. There are other ways to make sure that children are safe. For example i would be for drug/alcohol testing. Those are the parents who are an actual danger to their children.

Show quote history

So theoretically you take them to court and “change it”. How many babies will suffer because they’ve gone under the radar? Do you think your ‘right’ to privacy is worth the deaths of children?

You sound very selfish. You say you’ve nothing against drug/alcohol testing and parents and children can been seen at clinic. What happens if they don’t show up? How will they know if a parent has drug/alcohol problems?

Keepingthingsinteresting · 09/05/2025 21:41

Exactly which of your human rights do you think are being violated? Human rights are not this ephemeral concept, they are concrete and specific and really can’t see what you thus k is being breached.

I am private too but an awkward 15 mins for me is more than worth it for catching those children being abused or living in neglectful or unsuitable environments. YABVU unreasonable and you won’t get a decent lawyer to represent you.

Original poster
Erlisk · 09/05/2025 21:42

godsmessage · 09/05/2025 21:17

OP, I think that if you approached the conversation about health visitor involvement in the same way as you’ve described it here, that may have raised red flags. While I agree with the general principle that you shouldn’t have to have anyone in your house without consent, that doesn’t override safeguarding your child. If they had concerns about your DC’s wellbeing, then that really overrides you not wanting people in your house.

As an aside, though, I don’t think it’s right that professionals threaten SS involvement if you don’t accept HV visits. I was told, when I asked if the service was mandatory, that it wasn’t but it would be a red flag if I refused. I didn’t refuse, btw, I was mainly curious tbh.

However, either the service is mandatory, or it isn’t. It’s unfair to say to parents that a service is optional and then see it as a red flag in and of itself when the service is refused (of course I’m not talking about situations when there are additional reasons to be concerned…) If refusing HV visits is considered enough to warrant a call to SS, then they should just make the service mandatory so that parents know where they stand.

Exactly. There are many people who say HV told them it would be a red flag. They told me too. I still refused. Then they threatened with SS. Then they actually referred me when i refused. I think people are afraid to say no when they say it would be a "red flag". So it is mandatory, not optional.

OP posts:
Gogo509 · 09/05/2025 21:45

Erlisk · 09/05/2025 21:42

Exactly. There are many people who say HV told them it would be a red flag. They told me too. I still refused. Then they threatened with SS. Then they actually referred me when i refused. I think people are afraid to say no when they say it would be a "red flag". So it is mandatory, not optional.

Show quote history

Just let them in, it's literally a tick box for them unless the child is in harms way.

choppywood · 09/05/2025 21:45

Yeah you are a huge red flag and quite frankly pretty ridiculous 🙄

Hedonism · 09/05/2025 21:46

Gogo509 · 09/05/2025 21:38

I wish you and your child the very best. Again all I have to say on this matter is any health visitor visiting my home has only had my child's interest at heart. This is what matters.

Show quote history

100% this

CheeseWisely · 09/05/2025 21:46

More red flags than a communist parade, no wonder they called SS.

I don’t like visitors either so I get that, but sometimes in adult life you need to suck it up. We had health visitors come round twice when DS was newborn, and in other circumstances we’ve had builders coming in and out after our apartment building was damaged by a storm, also when I was at home with a newborn. I don’t find it comfortable but sometimes needs must. Some things are more important than my preference for privacy. The wellbeing of my child and his right to live in a safe home is certainly one of them.

Firsttimecommentor · 09/05/2025 21:48

Erlisk · 09/05/2025 20:08

I have seen it here before but the posts are old. Before my baby was born i told my midwife (UK) that i did not want any visits at home. I just like my privacy and want to be able to decide who enters my home. They offer visits as a service so i just decided to not let them in. I was happy to go for appointments.

Then in the hospital when the baby was born, they told me "someone was going to come into my house even if i do not want that". I kept saying no. They kept saying they just wanted to see where the baby would sleep etc. i said no. Then the midwifes came to the door and i told them i did not want them in my house. So they reported me to social services. Social services called me and threatened with official investigation if i do not let the midwifes and later health visitor in my house. Also for the one year visit.

I texted them many times i did not want. I also told them in person. So i have a lot of proof. Ok long story short i let them in.because they threatened with social services investigation = trying to take your baby. I had to let them in, they said everything was fine, and closed the case. But instead of bonding with my baby i was stressed that they were trying to take her away.

So. It is ten months ago so the one year visit is coming and I DO NOT WANT THEM IN MY HOUSE. So i decided to go after them. And yes, it is human rights violation. It is not normal in civilised countries that someone comes to your house without your consent and without a warrant. If you do not let them in they basically threaten to take your baby.

I am not looking for the comments that they are just helping etc. I am not interested in that 😉. What i am looking for here is other moms who went after them. I am researching where to complain. I am also making a list of solicitors who would help me. And maybe some group court case? I will make complaint to NHS. I believe we only have one year for this kind of thing so only people who experienced this last year. Or if you went through going to court and have a good no win no fee lawyer (London or Kent). They are violating human rights you everyone so no, i will not let it go.

Kindly, if the stress of them coming into your home and the hoo ha around that was a lot of you and stopped you bonding with your baby- I would think going after them with solicitors is not the best for your mental health.

It’s a wonderful free service that we’re lucky to have.