Things your children say that make you smile

[deaftowhingeing]

I know, it's bloody hard work most of the time but sometimes you can't help laughing:

DD1 to MIL "Nanny, why have you got a hairy lip?"

DD1 (4yo) "I don't like sheepdogs"

DH: "Why not darling?"

DD1 "Well I get confused - are they sheep or are they dogs?"

Oh, I'm really looking forward to hearing what DS has to say for himself. At the moment he's only 5.5 MO. At the moment, my favourite thing he says is when he sticks his fist in his mouth, looks at me and says "Goigoigoigoigoi"

When I was out and about in my wheelchair, I was accosted by 3yo twins who were totally fascinated by my "big wheels". One grabbed one side and pushed the wheel clockwise, the other grabbed the other side and pushed it anti-clockwise. this had the effect of spinning me round in a circle giggling helplessly.

DD comes out with some real corkers.

Another poo one, "Ooooh its a big fat one"

"Mummy we need some Cillit bang because BANG and the dirt is gone"

And shes currently obsessed with signs and inparticular warning signs and says "What does that Oh ooo mean?"

dd2 singing:
Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. The little dog laughed to see such fun, and the dishwasher way with the spoon.

dd1 (5), to her Granny:
When ladies kiss daddies, they go red.

DS (2.4) is a poet.

The other night he looked up at me after his story and said very seriously, "Mummy, I am old boy, new boy, dark boy, blue boy."

For some reason he has also taken to calling volcanoes 'kinaphoners'.

Started different thread cos I couldn't find you but

DS1 this morning has just asked

Mummy are you and daddy going to the cinema again tonight for some cock porn..

thankfully only the whole nursery class heard us..

Ha ha DS is almost 3 and is great for these at the moment too.

He sings "Old-Not-Doughnut had a farm..."

When I was sitting him on the toilet and telling him we were waiting for the poo to come out, he said "It is crying, it wants to come out. It wants to be with its family in the sea" wtf?

And he said the squeaky noise in our car was caused by "A family of owls but you can't see them. They is playing the piano." (is obsessed with the concept of "families")

snowleopard I love those - great stories to remind them of when they are older

DS (5) loves to currently sing I am the champion by queen followed by the silliest guitar playing - blame the chicken little dvd lol.

He hs also taken to calling DH "babe" as its what I call him - favourite at the moment is "babe can I have a drink please".

He also went through a stage of calling elderly men and women "granny and grandpa" - mmmm some thought it was cute but others were not amused - thankfully he doesnt do it anymore.

My brother will always remain as "aunty g" - started when he could first speak and he loves to still call it him out of fun.

the pointy bits on my norks are my nibbles....very apprpriate, always makes me smile...

DS is 2.5 and just started saying

"fee fi fo fum, I smell the blood of mummy's bum. Because I LIKE it!"

jingleyjen...have just spat on the keyboard

was he right btw?

Think I've mentioned this before (but it is still very fresh in my mind.)

"Oh Mummy, I do love your yellow teeth..'

Thanks, darl.

no can't find a babysitter. He prefers the toffee to the sugar stuff

DD 2.5 has come put with some crackers. Ones I can remember off the top of my head are:

"Mummy, you've got lovely wobbly thighs"

"Can I please just do a poo in peace" (wonder where she's got that from )

"You look like a nice big hairy dog" (I was wearing a big woolly jumper)

lol at daisycats DS " girls have a china" - a mate was driving through china town in Melbourne with her 5 DC and her MIL.

DS2: "Mum, where are we?"
Mum: "China Town"
DD4 (age 4): "Vagina Town?"
All five DC (chanting!): "Vagina town, Vagina town, Vagina town!"

Whilst my mate looked straight ahead and kept driving, and MIL sat with pursed lips!

This thread has had me in fits ....
This week, my five-year old has been playing with water pistols. He marched in and announced with great seriousness 'Mummy, this water pistol is so powerful it could stun a fox for eighteen hours.' Why the precision?
Then, my nearly-two girl watched me getting dressed yesterday. I'm nearly 7 months pregnant so when she said 'Mummy, your bum is sticking out', I said 'Oh my bump is sticking out is it?'
'No,' she came back firmly, 'your BUM is sticking out.'

Was playing a game with DD, doing the silly French knight voice from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. I told her "I am French Knight", to which she replied. "Well I am a Polish dinosaur"

Gawd knows where she got that from.

DS2 "Daddy, when I grow up will I have prickles on my face like you?

DH "yes you will"

DS2 "and will I have a big nose like yours too?"

a few years ago my daughter then 5 yrs old was sitting on my sisters lap and was about to give her a kiss when she shouted " you've got a moustache" it was hilarious

Recent conversation, undertaken with a good friend when my daughter was supposedly out of hearing

Friend: Can I abuse your interwebs for a moment please?

Me: Aye, use IE as it means I'll not have to reset my passwords.

Friend: Oh it's okay, I know you just don't want me to see your porn.

Me: You know I don't like to share:p

Daughter pipes up from the hallway: It's okay Auntie 'x' I'll share my porn, mummy is being mean!

Suffice to say friend and I had to keep very straight faces as my daughter then continued to orchestrate a fimble war in the hallway

bump