Four baths for baby in six months and no handwashing for 2yo?

[Sera1989]

Just want to find out if this is normal.
My friend has a six month old, she told me he has had four baths in his life (she added on three swimming pool trips but I wouldn’t call these a bath personally). She wipes his face and neck with a dry cloth. He doesn’t look dirty but does have smelly feet. Her 2 year old is bathed most days in plain water. No handwashing after playing outside or after eating, just wiped with a dry cloth. He sometimes looks as though he has food build up around his fingernails.

She is a good mum, children are safe and looked after well, nappy changes done promptly and no financial issues. While I don’t think kids always need a full bath everyday I am training to be a childminder and you need to look after other people’s kids more diligently than you might look after your own, so minded kids get their hands washed with soap several times a day. Just wondering if my friend’s hygiene is normal or not - if so I might plan to wash kids’ hands when they arrive in the morning just so I know they’re starting off clean

She is not a good mum. Come on now op.

Yeah this is a bit odd, I don't think she's intentionally being lazy though, especially if the older one is getting bathed regularly, it sounds like she feels the more baths the more damage it'll do to the skin, and she's right - to a certain point. A baby does not need bathing every single day unless they are literally covered in shit/ dirt but they certainly need a bath/wash more regularly than what she's doing! My daughter is 18 months old and as a newborn was given a warm flannel around her face/hands/genitals every day but I didn't fully bath her very often as it wasn't necessary but once she got to 5/6 months it was every single night but purely for her to get into a routine..once that routine was established I calmed down on the baths and now at 18 months she had a bath 3x a week and the days she doesn't get bathed she has her face and hands washed at the sink with a flannel and warm water as I do her teeth. Baby's love baths though so apart from the hygiene issue, it's a shame he's missing out!

To answer some questions she is quite clean but her partner is not, he has good oral hygiene but I’m not sure he showers very often. I get the impression he comes from a sort of middle class hippy family so perhaps lack of washing/chemicals is his idea.

As well as that the older child has eczema. My friend says it’s not good to wash babies much because they need their skin oils. Which is probably true to some extent but I think they definitely need some sort of soap on their bum or it’ll get sore? And toddler hands because they touch food, outdoor objects and put their hands in their mouths? Even if it’s a soap-free cleanser.

She genuinely is a good mum in all other ways except the lack of washing so it’s a bit strange. The toddler goes to nursery several times a week so at least his hands are being washed there and wouldn’t hygiene concerns be picked up and discussed by staff?

Did you notice the smelly feet, bit of dirt before she said anything about baths? I love bathing my children but I probably do it far more than I need to. Especially with babies before they start eating, I imagine a flannel wash would probably be sufficient. If you hadn't noticed before she said then they can't be that dirty. If they have clean clothes and get a wipedown and are otherwise well cared for it would be a shitty thing to disrupt their family by reporting them.

Not right at all and needs an intervention of some sort - does she have issues with cleanliness herself?