We’re just about to host DS’s 8th birthday. It’s an activity with about 12 kids. All costs covered by us but it is a 30 mins drive from where most of us live so a bit of effort needed by parents of guests.
We’ll be giving out party bags.
I would like to say “no gifts” as in previous years I’ve seen people spend up to £20 on things like Lego but DS is getting more and more picky about what he likes so presents do often go unplayed with, plus he has loads of stuff. He’s mostly into computer games now and that’s not something I would expect people to buy as party presents. He goes to private school and the parents are quite well off so it’s not a cost thing, but know myself what a stress it is trying to choose a present.
(All the kids are very good at doing written thank-you cards after the event, and DS has done his meticulously every previous year).
Some parents have opted for a book swap where everyone brings a wrapped book (new or used) and each child picks one in a lucky dip to take home. I love that idea.
The problem is that DS is a spoiled little prince and while he acknowledges that he hasn’t played with some past presents, he still really loves the idea of a pile of wrapped gifts and sees them at other kids’ parties.
I thought that maybe I could just ask for books only as presents and that way DS gets a nice selection of books suggested by his classmates, but not ridiculous money spent if they don’t appeal to him. DH thinks that asking for books is very “worthy” and prescriptive and could annoy people.
Asking for cash or voucher contributions eg to a new game he might want to buy just seems a bit transactional.
Any tips on what works best in these situations? Parents would welcome “no gifts”, surely, but is it possible that a child attending might feel put out if they weren’t getting the chance to give a gift? (DS does have a couple of friends where he’s said “oh, we should buy X this for his birthday, he’d love it).