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Original poster

Boy mum

91 replies

Gifgaf · 02/08/2024 16:55

Just found out I am having a baby boy after two girls. What is it like being a boy mum ?

Is it true what they say about the relationship between a boy and his mum ? Thanks all ❤️

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rubyslippers · 02/08/2024 16:56

its a lot like being a girl mum
I have one of each and babies and toddlers, well there’s no difference in parenting either sex
neither of mine like football
both love shopping 😉

congrats on your pregnancy!

gettingbacktobeingmeagain · 02/08/2024 16:58

I don't know what they say tbh, but I can tell you I love being a boy mum...we love each other to bits, are very affectionate and laugh a lot; it's been like that since he was a tiny scrap, and as we approach the teenage years I so hope it stays like that!

BusyCM · 02/08/2024 16:59

I mean, you hadn't been a girl mum before your first daughter and you've probably got on just fine so I imagine much the same.

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WinterMorn · 02/08/2024 17:27

We need to stop this ‘Boy Mum’ notion ASAP. How about raising a decent, well rounded human being without all the focus on boys/girls? There is some really interesting writing on this topic and how Boy Mum is a negative term, right up there with phrases like “boys will be boys” and all the rest of it.

MinnieMountain · 02/08/2024 17:29

What do they say OP? Asking in case I’ve got it wrong with 10yo DS.

Original poster
Gifgaf · 02/08/2024 19:56

MinnieMountain · 02/08/2024 17:29

What do they say OP? Asking in case I’ve got it wrong with 10yo DS.

Just that boys are a lot closer with mum and daughters are much closer with dads. I know not every child may have both or relationships like that it's generally what I hear a lot of. My daughter's love but they are super close with their dad. I've seen it growing up as well, I love my mum but me and my dad have always been a bit closer.

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Original poster
Gifgaf · 02/08/2024 19:59

WinterMorn · 02/08/2024 17:27

We need to stop this ‘Boy Mum’ notion ASAP. How about raising a decent, well rounded human being without all the focus on boys/girls? There is some really interesting writing on this topic and how Boy Mum is a negative term, right up there with phrases like “boys will be boys” and all the rest of it.

I get what you are trying to say but I don't think there's anything wrong with it tbh, unless you make it a negative thing. I've got two girls and I have loved every bit of it, but I assume raising boys is a little different. I 100% agree about raising boys/girls as well rounded human beings but nothing wrong with being a little curious in what being a boy mum is like. It's a new experience for me, I am not trying to stir arguments just friendly mum discussions...

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Original poster
Gifgaf · 02/08/2024 20:02

BusyCM · 02/08/2024 16:59

I mean, you hadn't been a girl mum before your first daughter and you've probably got on just fine so I imagine much the same.

True but I guess being a girl myself I had all sorts of imaginations on what it's like and a lot were true. I am sure I will get on fine this time as well but just curious that's all

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Original poster
Gifgaf · 02/08/2024 20:03

gettingbacktobeingmeagain · 02/08/2024 16:58

I don't know what they say tbh, but I can tell you I love being a boy mum...we love each other to bits, are very affectionate and laugh a lot; it's been like that since he was a tiny scrap, and as we approach the teenage years I so hope it stays like that!

That's sweet ☺️

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bakewellbride · 02/08/2024 20:04

I have one of each, nearly 6 year old ds and toddler dd. It's an amazing experience. Ds is kind, gentle, well mannered and thoughtful, glowing school reports, lots of friends, tries his best at everything. I could go on!

The downside tbh is other people's views. I sometimes get told how 'boys are better behaved', 'girls are smarter at school' etc. Of course I know none of it is true but it still makes me angry to hear! So you might need to learn how to ignore crap like this or think of some decent comebacks!

Original poster
Gifgaf · 02/08/2024 20:05

rubyslippers · 02/08/2024 16:56

its a lot like being a girl mum
I have one of each and babies and toddlers, well there’s no difference in parenting either sex
neither of mine like football
both love shopping 😉

congrats on your pregnancy!

Thank you ☺️
My main aim is really to raise two great women and men one day but I just wonder how much more wild boys are in comparison to girls. This woman recently told me that her daughter was an angel growing up but a nightmare in her teenage years and her son the opposite.

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OlympicsFanGirl · 02/08/2024 20:06

I have one of each.

What does that make me?

I think this girl mum / boy mum thing is another way of reinforcing stereotypes.

There's no difference. They are individuals with interests and personalities unique to them.

Helpimfalling · 02/08/2024 20:07

Early days they have the ability to pee in yours or their own face 🤦‍♀️

SilenceInside · 02/08/2024 20:08

Boys are not wild unless you let them be. Much like girls. Their individual personalities and how you bring them up is more important than any differences that are solely down to their sex. Try and avoid sexist stereotyping, even the unconscious kind, and that will help.

Runningupthecurtains · 02/08/2024 20:08

Learn to be quick on nappy changes or you get an eyeful of wee.
That's it really.
As I write this DS 13 is snuggling up to me on the sofa and when I tell him to shift because it's too hot responding 'but I love you and missed you when you were at work'.

bakewellbride · 02/08/2024 20:11

@Gifgaf "I just wonder how much more wild boys are in comparison to girls."

This couldn't be further from the truth for me. Ds has always been very chilled. Didn't walk until 18 months, very easy going. Never had a toddler tantrum ever (he cried and got a bit angry at times but never did the classic throwing himself on the floor or anything).

Toddler dd is lovely but a whirlwind compared to ds! Always determined to do everything herself / first etc. Sometimes hits ds and needs telling off. Has had some classic tantrums! You get the idea.

I really hate this stereotype that girls are gentle and boys the opposite, it's really not helpful. Every child is an individual imo.

Original poster
Gifgaf · 02/08/2024 20:11

Helpimfalling · 02/08/2024 20:07

Early days they have the ability to pee in yours or their own face 🤦‍♀️

😂 oh gosh

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Original poster
Gifgaf · 02/08/2024 20:19

Runningupthecurtains · 02/08/2024 20:08

Learn to be quick on nappy changes or you get an eyeful of wee.
That's it really.
As I write this DS 13 is snuggling up to me on the sofa and when I tell him to shift because it's too hot responding 'but I love you and missed you when you were at work'.

I am a bit nervous about all that especially cleaning them properly. Girls it's much easier I think but luckily I got my husband to give good tips on all boy stuff lol

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SilenceInside · 02/08/2024 20:22

It's a lot easier to do a baby boys nappy than a girls, there's nothing to it. No need for any specialist input from a man! Just keep a small flannel or similar handy in case of unexpected weeing. Some babies seem to take the removal of a nappy as an invitation!

Newsenmum · 02/08/2024 20:24

It’s not a thing so please don’t make it a thing. We have no idea what he’ll be like
and tbh neither do you!

Original poster
Gifgaf · 02/08/2024 20:27

bakewellbride · 02/08/2024 20:11

@Gifgaf "I just wonder how much more wild boys are in comparison to girls."

This couldn't be further from the truth for me. Ds has always been very chilled. Didn't walk until 18 months, very easy going. Never had a toddler tantrum ever (he cried and got a bit angry at times but never did the classic throwing himself on the floor or anything).

Toddler dd is lovely but a whirlwind compared to ds! Always determined to do everything herself / first etc. Sometimes hits ds and needs telling off. Has had some classic tantrums! You get the idea.

I really hate this stereotype that girls are gentle and boys the opposite, it's really not helpful. Every child is an individual imo.

My youngest DD is as wild as it gets but generally girls do tend to be more chilled than boys. From general chats with other mums when they mention their boys, it's usually chaotic and where my DD is already chaotic it made me a little nervous tbh. I am sure I'll get hate for this but some "stereotypes" are not always untrue. I know everyone is different regardless of their gender but we have a saying back home that girls generally are more gentle souls and look out for their parents more, whereas boys once they get married there is less attention. From what I have seen in my time, I have seen that to be true in most cases. That doesn't mean boys are careless and rude but there is definitely some difference. My main goal for boys my girls and boys is to raise them to be brilliant Women and men and that's always going to be the main priority. However, I just wanted to hear experiences of having a son even if the difference is very small.

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Original poster
Gifgaf · 02/08/2024 20:28

Newsenmum · 02/08/2024 20:24

It’s not a thing so please don’t make it a thing. We have no idea what he’ll be like
and tbh neither do you!

True I don't that's why I was curious what other mums'experiences are with having a son. It's not that serious honestly.

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SilenceInside · 02/08/2024 20:32

The reason that boys are chaotic is generally speaking many parents excuse chaotic behaviour by blaming their sex. Boys are often praised or excused for behaviours that girls are criticised for, from tiny babies onwards and so these sexist prophecies are fulfilled.

WinterMorn · 02/08/2024 20:37

SilenceInside · 02/08/2024 20:32

The reason that boys are chaotic is generally speaking many parents excuse chaotic behaviour by blaming their sex. Boys are often praised or excused for behaviours that girls are criticised for, from tiny babies onwards and so these sexist prophecies are fulfilled.

Exactly this. Even the term ‘boy-mum’ suggests some special status is being conferred, as does ‘girl-dad’. It perpetuates stereotypes and is not a good thing.

LostMySocks · 02/08/2024 20:39

I have 2 boys. Love them to bits.
They're very different characters but one thing in common....so much easier to deal with needing the loo when they're out and about until they hit the age when they can no longer go into the ladies loos without impacting the dignity of the girls and women who need them.
Instead I have to stand outside the gents and tell them to yell if they can't unlock the door or get lost and can't find the way out. Worst still is the time they take to emerge from swimming (and then being sent back to retrieve the missing bits).