What age could you more or less do your own thing at home with your child around?

[Chessboardtable]

What age was your child when you could more or less do your own thing with them around at home? (And I mean specifically without plugging them into a screen / electronic device!)

3 - comfortably. They repeat after you or play by themselves. Big Lego and Montessori toys help too.

around age 4, dipping in and out of the room to check for mischief. Not for a sustained period

Around the second birthday

The older the child, the longer they could be left to keep themselves entertained. When mine were three or four years old then I'd be checking every 5-10min. By the time they were 7 or 8 then that would be more like half an hour to an hour depending on what they were doing. By early teens then it'd be several hours although there'd probably be some TV, computer or phone in there as well.

Maybe 5? He'd happily play with Lego/draw superheroes for a good while. But he'd still probably come to find me every 5 mins with 'Mummy, come look what I've made'.....'Mummy do you like my drawing' etc etc

Not all day at two I mean. For example with my eldest the childminder could do activities with the children about to start school and he would play independantly but supervised nearby, he was almost two.

Probably around 3 but my first was (is) a super sensible kid. My second is fairly sensible but can do random stuff when not kept an eye on, so I tend to ask my eldest to keep an eye when I'm busy elsewhere and I regularly check in. I think it does depend on the child to a certain extent.

With my eldest around 5 she could be playing in her room or in the garden whilst I worked or got on with jobs without needing to check on her.

My youngest, still not consistently now at 7 although sometimes. He has adhd so it’s been a bit longer for him to be safe alone

Shows how different life is with an SEN child. Even at eight he wants to be played with constantly unless watching TV. I’d love to be able to do some painting and decorating while he’s here, but it’s not realistic. I can just about do some quick baking, but there’s usually interruptions.

3 but would need to keep popping my head round to check he's ok! I could happily have a shower or go upstairs and do a bit of housework though.

How long for?

My 2 year old will sit and play for a bit, she'll play for longer if she's playing with my 5 year old.
But it's not long enough that I can really go off and do my own thing, and they still need monitoring so I don't have a totally free choice on what I do - I couldn't go for a nap, or have a bath, and just leave them downstairs.

My eldest is nearly 8 and I'm still waiting 🤣 I can't go for a pee without him opening the door with something random like a jar of olives for me to open. He's not particularly safe to be left unsupervised.

My youngest from about age two. He's now nearly 7

Such different children

Surprised by some of these responses. I guess it depends what you mean by doing your own thing and for how long. My 7 yo is totally safe to be on her own and is very sensible but would she want to be on her own for a particularly long time? No! She’d be coming and asking me to do stuff with her all the time (unless engaged in a good book or a good game with her sibling)

Yeah I thought this! I took the op to mean just going about your day mainly, which I 100 percent couldnt do at age 2,3,4,5. Even now mines nearly 7 and unless I stuck her on a screen all day she wants to be near me and doing things with me involved, I can't just please myself

I guess it depends what you mean by doing your own thing and for how long.

At two, in the same room, I could watch an hour long programme or read some of a book with occasional input. I could do jobs for 15 minutes moving between rooms and they would follow. At four, could be playing with lego in another room within earshot for an hour.

Wow, really!! My 2 Yr old can sometimes do 5 minutes, but then wants interaction

I was just thinking this! Before I opened the thread, I was going to say 9.

Haha, I was thinking 9. At 2-5 mine would entertain themselves for mere minutes rather than hours.

Eldest had an intense interest in puzzles and construction toys, then dc2 and dc3 weren't only children.

Shocked by some of the young ages. So to give an example, what I mean is if you could have a day where you do all of the following ,without neglecting your child, how old is your child :

• shower & dress
• 1 hour work / computer admin type jobs
• 30 minute nap
• 1 hour reading / watching tv of your choice
• 1 hour home workout / yoga
• cook a proper dinner
• 1 hour on a DIY project

Nobody looking after a 2 or 3 year old just goes about their day without the child being the primary focus for at least some of it. That doesn’t mean they can’t do some independent play but that’s not what the OP was asking. Any preschooler is unlikely to be able to entertain themselves all day without any input or indeed needing a parent to provide lunch/snacks etc. Even more so if you’re saying that being occupied by a screen doesn’t “count”.

I think the average age for what you’re talking about is much nearer 6 or 7. Even my 5 year old who can play on her on quite well would still need a decent amount of input from me at various points throughout the day.

My eight year old will play an hour on his own (kick a ball round the garden, read, arts and crafts). It's unreliable though - at times he'll want me to play with him.

Seven

Son is nearly 3 and I can do a few of these

• shower & dress
Yes, if he doesn't want to join me in the shower in the morning I shower myself while he plays. Bathroom door wide open and certain rooms locked that I don't want him to go in.

• 1 hour work / computer admin type jobs
Definitely not. I can do bits and bobs online if I have to but I don't like it/can't get into the headspace with him around. We like to be out of the house a lot with him anyway.

• 30 minute nap
Not regularly but when I've been unwell and he's not in nursery, I shut us both in the living room which is seriously child-proofed and he plays with his toys while I doze. He understands "mummy is sick and needs a little rest"

• 1 hour reading / watching tv of your choice
Wouldn't watch telly with him around but I do put one wireless ear bud in and listen to podcasts sometimes while I'm doing housework and he's playing. Our choice of music is often playing while we're going about our day too.

• 1 hour home workout / yoga
Don't work out at home, go cycling or swimming so no to this.

• cook a proper dinner
Can cook dinner with him around no problem. Prefer to put something in the slow cooker while he's having lunch but if I'm cooking in the evening he's just pottering about.

• 1 hour on a DIY project
Yes we often do an hour or more on DIY around the house together and our son quite likes it. He gets involved in things that are safe. He's quite excited whenever we're doing things, if I'm cooking he likes to play with his toy kitchen, if we're doing DIY he gets his little toolbox out and hammers away at bits of wood or mucks about with the tape measure or spirit level.

Thinking back to my own childhood I remember my parents doing their own thing, watching telly, reading, my mum chatting on the phone etc when I was about 7 and older. I'd have been amusing myself or playing in the garden or on the street with friends.

I’d think 7 or 8 for all of those in one day. You get if you pick just one or two. My dd is 4 and I can shower and cook, and can do a few bits of work but there’s no way I would have a nap whilst she’s awake or be able to do an hours diy or yoga.