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Original poster

Child escaped car seat…referral to social services

305 replies

A2010 · 30/12/2023 16:48

My 2 year old daughter absolutely hates sitting in her car seat and escapes literally every 30 seconds.

My husband took her out today when she escaped her car seat and climbed in to the passenger seat. He should have stopped but he told me because he was nearly there he didn’t. Which has absolutely infuriated me😭

Anyway, someone has obviously reported all this and the police pulled him over. He’s not been fined or anything like that, they just gave him a lecture but also said it was being logged with social services??

Does anyone know what will happen next, I’m absolutely beside myself.

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AnneValentine · 31/12/2023 15:08

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 10:36

Sometimes we don’t realise until her leg is climbing over in to the front passenger seat.

How can she get out of a rear facing seat and not be noticed until she is climbing into the front seat? That's whole level of oblivion that no driver should have.

Because you cannot see them getting out of the straps.

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 15:44

@AnneValentine

Because you cannot see them getting out of the straps.

Right, but you would have to be Stevie wonder not to spot them climb out of the seat, move across to the middle of the car and lift their leg towards the front seat.

Torchdino · 31/12/2023 15:59

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 15:44

@AnneValentine

Because you cannot see them getting out of the straps.

Right, but you would have to be Stevie wonder not to spot them climb out of the seat, move across to the middle of the car and lift their leg towards the front seat.

Anyone who doesn't notice this shouldn't be driving,!

Interested in this thread?

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Lookingatthesunset · 31/12/2023 16:01

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 15:44

@AnneValentine

Because you cannot see them getting out of the straps.

Right, but you would have to be Stevie wonder not to spot them climb out of the seat, move across to the middle of the car and lift their leg towards the front seat.

I don't imagine Stevie drives...!! 😂

AnneValentine · 31/12/2023 17:00

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 15:44

@AnneValentine

Because you cannot see them getting out of the straps.

Right, but you would have to be Stevie wonder not to spot them climb out of the seat, move across to the middle of the car and lift their leg towards the front seat.

They're fast and even when you do see them? Then what?

Also not sure why you’re assuming it’s leg first. My daughter’s head used to suddenly appear between the seats or over the back of her seat. Never her leg. I don’t even know how that would work.

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 31/12/2023 17:36

jannier · 31/12/2023 13:39

Why are you not telling the person who suggested it?

Show quote history

I posted at the end of a string of comments. My post is not invisible to Strictlymad.

jannier · 31/12/2023 18:25

AnneValentine · 31/12/2023 17:00

They're fast and even when you do see them? Then what?

Also not sure why you’re assuming it’s leg first. My daughter’s head used to suddenly appear between the seats or over the back of her seat. Never her leg. I don’t even know how that would work.

Edited
Show quote history

Op said it was a leg

jannier · 31/12/2023 18:26

AnneValentine · 31/12/2023 15:08

Because you cannot see them getting out of the straps.

Show quote history

Put a mirror on the back of the seat so you can see them.

jannier · 31/12/2023 18:27

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 31/12/2023 17:36

I posted at the end of a string of comments. My post is not invisible to Strictlymad.

Show quote history

Ok you replied to me so confused

coolkatt · 31/12/2023 20:27

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SingleMum11 · 31/12/2023 20:32

With a SEN child I have had extra straps on seats for ages. You can get them online and you cannot get out of them.

Applesandpears23 · 31/12/2023 20:37

We had to solve this a different way. We gave the escapee a tablet to hold and watch in the car. It removed the temptation to escape. We also had a mirror attached to the middle of the back seat so we could see her face in the rear view mirror and she could see ours. It meant we were able to spot escape attempts sooner and pull over before she was all way out.

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 31/12/2023 20:54

u get specific locks for car seats for this actual problem.
but don't worry about it, let's just have a child be killed because we're scared the fire brigade may not have a proper cutter with them that one time an accident actually does happen.

I'm not quoting the misogynist slur at the start of @coolkatt's post.

A lot of things offered for sale, particularly online, don't actually meet UK safety standards. Just because something's available to buy doesn't mean it's safe.

We've already had people suggesting illegal chest straps. These "specific locks" you mention are strongly discouraged by Which? as they do not meet UK safety standards and constitute a modification to the child seat that renders the seat incompliant with safety standards.

Seat belts and child in-car restraints are required by law to be openable with a single action for a reason. Sometimes a child's rescuer isn't the fire brigade. Hands up who here carries a seat belt cutter in their pocket just in case?

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 21:00

@Lookingatthesunset

I don't imagine Stevie drives...!! 😂

That really was the whole point.

AnneValentine · 31/12/2023 21:06

jannier · 31/12/2023 18:25

Op said it was a leg

Show quote history

Regardless - leg appears, now what?

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 21:15

@AnneValentine

They're fast and even when you do see them? Then what?

Well the whole point of my comment was about OP not seeing it, not what happens next.

Also not sure why you’re assuming it’s leg first. My daughter’s head used to suddenly appear between the seats or over the back of her seat. Never her leg. I don’t even know how that would work.

Ask OP, how it works, since it was OP who said it was leg first.

Edited

AnneValentine · 31/12/2023 21:23

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 21:15

@AnneValentine

They're fast and even when you do see them? Then what?

Well the whole point of my comment was about OP not seeing it, not what happens next.

Also not sure why you’re assuming it’s leg first. My daughter’s head used to suddenly appear between the seats or over the back of her seat. Never her leg. I don’t even know how that would work.

Ask OP, how it works, since it was OP who said it was leg first.

Edited

Because often you don’t see. If they’re forward facing you can see easier but even then that doesn’t mean they’re going to follow instructions. The assumption that they aren’t paying attention to the back of a car seat and that’s why it happens is ridiculous.

she also said SOMETIMES they don’t notice until a leg appears.

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 21:29

@AnneValentine

Because often you don’t see.

Yes, I'm asking how they cannot notice such a large amount of movement - a loose child in the car should be very noticeable.

If they’re forward facing you can see easier but even then that doesn’t mean they’re going to follow instructions.

I think a child leaving a rear facing seat would actually be much more noticeable than a child leaving a forward facer. To leave a rear facing seat they have to climb. To leave a forward facing seat they just move forwards. I didn't mention instruction.

The assumption that they aren’t paying attention to the back of a car seat and that’s why it happens is ridiculous.

Well if a child has left a rear facing seat and for as far as a leg into the front seat and the driver hasn't spotted it I think the assumption they are not paying attention is quite solid.

she also said SOMETIMES they don’t notice until a leg appears.

Yes, and I said you would have to be Stevie wonder to not notice a child clambering out of a rear facing seat until their leg was going to the front seat.

MileyWiley · 31/12/2023 21:31

Children’s MASH will ring as they have to, they’ll offer you parenting support or Early Help, which you can either take or decline, and that will be the end of it.

AnneValentine · 31/12/2023 21:38

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 21:29

@AnneValentine

Because often you don’t see.

Yes, I'm asking how they cannot notice such a large amount of movement - a loose child in the car should be very noticeable.

If they’re forward facing you can see easier but even then that doesn’t mean they’re going to follow instructions.

I think a child leaving a rear facing seat would actually be much more noticeable than a child leaving a forward facer. To leave a rear facing seat they have to climb. To leave a forward facing seat they just move forwards. I didn't mention instruction.

The assumption that they aren’t paying attention to the back of a car seat and that’s why it happens is ridiculous.

Well if a child has left a rear facing seat and for as far as a leg into the front seat and the driver hasn't spotted it I think the assumption they are not paying attention is quite solid.

she also said SOMETIMES they don’t notice until a leg appears.

Yes, and I said you would have to be Stevie wonder to not notice a child clambering out of a rear facing seat until their leg was going to the front seat.

You are clueless and let’s stop with the ableist crap about blind people.

Thanks.

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 21:45

@AnneValentine

You are clueless and let’s stop with the ableist crap about blind people.

I will take the clueless since the whole point of my comment was that I do not know.

The ableism though. If I came across as ableist by using a blind person as an example I am deeply sorry. If mumsnet regard this as ableist I would be happy for them to delete my comments. Im not ableist, but I do make mistakes.

FamilyAreEverything · 31/12/2023 21:50

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 30/12/2023 19:58

but a child in a correctly-fitted car seat there is safer than climbing around the car.

I'm not disputing that at all, I'm saying it's best to get a front-facing child seat if you want to put a child in the front.

Show quote history

It is absolutely NOT safer to have a child in a FF car seat in the front of a car with airbag on. Airbags are designed for adults (men in fact - but that’s another story) and the force of an airbag hitting a FF child is enough to kill them.
If you have either a RF or FF seat and you cannot turn off the passenger airbag, then they must travel in the rear of the car.

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 31/12/2023 21:58

FamilyAreEverything · 31/12/2023 21:50

It is absolutely NOT safer to have a child in a FF car seat in the front of a car with airbag on. Airbags are designed for adults (men in fact - but that’s another story) and the force of an airbag hitting a FF child is enough to kill them.
If you have either a RF or FF seat and you cannot turn off the passenger airbag, then they must travel in the rear of the car.

Show quote history

I'll check that out. Thanks for the heads-up.

ETA: https://www.childcarseats.org.uk/choosing-using/airbags-and-child-seats/ indicates that a front-facing child seat in the front seat with the airbags on is not an absolute no-no but should be treated as the option of last resort.

I don't think I've stated nor implied that children aren't safest in the back. The rear seat is absolutely the safest place for a child.

AnneValentine · 31/12/2023 22:16

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 21:45

@AnneValentine

You are clueless and let’s stop with the ableist crap about blind people.

I will take the clueless since the whole point of my comment was that I do not know.

The ableism though. If I came across as ableist by using a blind person as an example I am deeply sorry. If mumsnet regard this as ableist I would be happy for them to delete my comments. Im not ableist, but I do make mistakes.

You are suggesting that only a blind person could be that useless. That is not ok.

hometimesanta · 31/12/2023 22:19

@AnneValentine

You are suggesting that only a blind person could be that useless. That is not ok.

I mean I was actually suggesting you would need to be blind not to notice it, but if you look at the comment of mine you are quoting you will see I have apologised if my comments were ableist and said I'm happy for mumsnet to delete.

You are like a dog with a fucking bone.