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Original poster

Would you leave your baby/child sleeping in bed..........

109 replies

Flumberrysauce · 10/12/2004 16:06

........... to go and pick someone up?

I ask this because my SIL used to do this about once a week to go and pick my brother up from a bar. They live in Japan. She's Japanese and said it took about 30 mins in total, she wasn't particularly happy about it but wasn't any other way for him to get home and taxis crippling over there. She didn't seem to think it was that big a deal though.

But I spose if they never wake up..... I dunno, I can't decide if its ok or not.

I've nearly popped out to shop before when baby asleep then remembered at the door that we have a baby and she's asleep in other room! Blush

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morningpaper · 10/12/2004 16:07

I think it's fairly illegal. :)

spacedonkey · 10/12/2004 16:07

No, I wouldn't. I've left mine on their own on the odd occasion recently but they are 13 and 11, and even then it feels wrong.

JanH · 10/12/2004 16:08

Not for 30 minutes. Have done it for 5 or so.

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PamiNativity · 10/12/2004 16:09

No, not even if convinced they wouldn't wake up. What if there was a fire? Doesn't bear thinking about it.
Very rarely, I have popped across the road to the corner shop whilst dds have been asleep, but only for 30 seconds max. It would take me longer and would be further to go to the end of the garden to hang up the washing.

DelGirlsRingAreYouListening · 10/12/2004 16:09

No, definitely not. A local girl left her 3 in bed to go and make a quick phone call at the phone box, the house caught fire and they all died. Poor woman Sad

dogwalkinginawinterwonderland · 10/12/2004 16:09

I wouldn't be comfortable with this at all. Occasionally leave ds2 (9) reading in bed whilst go to pick up his big brother from scouts but race there and race back. Don't like it at all.

Original poster
Flumberrysauce · 10/12/2004 16:12

I guess it is illegal is it, not sure?

May be different in Japan.

I've often thought could pop to shop but then thought what if I get hit by a car and die and noone knows there is a baby in the flat!! Scary

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OnZephyrstdayofXmas · 10/12/2004 16:14

I did it once when dd was little - she was asleep and I had to make an urgent phonecall but had to use the phonebox anout 30 seconds down the road. I felt sick the whole time and couldn't do it again!!

PickasillyChristmasName · 10/12/2004 16:16

I will go out of the house to the car to get things out of it when DS is asleep (he's 12 months) but even though I am gone about 15 seconds I still get worried.

No way would I leave him for 30 minutes.

Not until he's a lot older.

THEnorthstar · 10/12/2004 16:16

No I definately wouldn't.Shock what if something happened to you, like a car crash(worst case scenario) or even just a flat tyre?
Even in 2 minutes children can go from being fast asleep to being awake/upset/disorientated/scared from a nightmare/sick/vomiting................
I drive home from work at night and then have to wait for (and pay for) a taxi for my babysitter who lives quarter of a mile away on an extremely quiet country road in the middle of nowhere. It is fustrating but would still not consider leaving ds alone even for five minutes.

GlitterGrommit · 10/12/2004 16:47

NO WAY! Can't beleive anyone would leave a baby/young child in the house alone for even 1 minute. It is also illegal I believe to leave any child under the age of 12 alone.

Original poster
Flumberrysauce · 10/12/2004 16:49

GlitterGrommit - Do calm down. 40 years ago they did it all the time. Our society has become alot more protective - some might say over-protective.

OP posts:
SantaQuated · 10/12/2004 17:03

a friend lives amongst an ithernational community and she syas that in sone cultures this is toitally acceptable - they time baby-naps to coincide with school run time so that they can go alone. Shock

amynSaintnixmum · 10/12/2004 17:10

Apparently it isnt illegal to leave a child alone. I rang our local parent and pupil support line to get advice for a neighbour. She was thinking of going f/t at work and this would mean that her 2 girls aged 9 and 11 would be alone in the house after school till she returned (approx 2 hours). They live next door but one and the idea was that they would come to me or the neighbour the other side if they had a problem or just wanted company. I thought the age was 12 but apparently there is no minimum age by lawShock. I think the law only comes in in cases of neglect but where they draw the line is a mystery. My neighbour decided against it in the end.

TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 10/12/2004 17:17

NO

TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 10/12/2004 17:18

am appalled at the thought

DingDongDinosaurOnHigh · 10/12/2004 17:22

no

aBeanInaManger · 10/12/2004 17:24

NO! I sometimes leave bean while I go out in the garden and hang the washing up, but I can hear him and it takes me about 2 minutes. I couldn't leave him any longer than that, I'd worry too much.

hana · 10/12/2004 17:31

even if it's not illegal why would you do it? Making it illegal would make someone think twice about it?

hmmmmm I would not

Roobie · 10/12/2004 17:45

It is illegal in that although the law doesn't specify a minimum age it does state that the child should be able to look after itself - clearly not the case here!

joashiningstar · 10/12/2004 17:56

It may not be illegal, IMO it's wrong. I knew a woman who used to do this regularly in the evenings, whilst she went across the road to her friends house. She made a point of checking her children every 30 minutes or so...but 30 minutes is a long time.

What if anything happened to the child, who's fault would it be? Look at silly acidents that happen when we're in the house with our children. DD1 once, woke up whilst I was in the back garden, hanging the washing out. She ended up with stitches in her head, but imagine the scanario, if I'd been at the local shops or at a neighbours.

Even if a child is left with a babysitter - the absent parent is still legally (and dare I say, morally) responsible for anything that happens to the child if the babysitter is under 18!!!

God...you'd never be able to forgive yourself. I wouldn't do it and I'd definately have something to say to anyone that I knew who did.

misdee · 10/12/2004 18:00

dd2 was sleeping the other day, and i said to dd1 (joking) 'shall we leave her here' dd1 was yelling at me not to leave her as dd2 would be scared if she woke up.

even a 4yr old has sense!!

chonky · 10/12/2004 18:03

Absolutely not.

Gobbledigoose · 10/12/2004 18:43

No way - though every day I have to go and pick up ds1 from playgroup at 1pm and ds2 and ds3 are still asleep - it's a right pain having to get them up and disturb their sleep for the 10 min journey and I often thing 'I bet they wouldn't even wake while I was gone' but there is no way I could do it.

What if something happened on the journey - either to me or if I came across another accident blocking the road or something else that held me up. I'd be going crazy. Or what if you were burgled or the house caught fire (unlikely I know)..no way, couldn't do it.

LIZS · 10/12/2004 18:48

No, I don't think it is ok. I have monitored for a friend in an apartment downstairs while she has collected elder child from school though - I had her baby listener and the key to their flat, but she never woke up. I did sometimes leave dd asleep while I waited for ds in front of our building. There is a more relaxed attitude on some places though - German lady I know left her ds aged about 2 asleep while she did a school run (approx 25 mins), but her friends did express their worries when they realised. Also know of Swiss lady who did the same, leaving her baby asleep alone to go to the local shop. Perhaps it is just not as uncommon as this thread might lead us to believe and cultural differences may come into play too.

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