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Original poster

What do people do for childcare if they've no family help?

85 replies

Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 17:11

Feeling exhausted so be gentle. DC 10 and 6

Desperate for a holiday away from my children. I love them very much but they are with me all.the.time.

My husband is stressed and depressed, I am just fed up of the daily humdrum and the tantrums and rudeness from 10yr old.

I want to take my husband away for some us time. But we have nobody who would care for the children. Not even for a few hours.

I know this is probably a very first world problem and I know I've probably just got to suck it up but just in case, anyone got any ideas?

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Original poster
Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 17:12

Oh and the whining, from both DC, good lord the whining!

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Clymene · 22/04/2023 17:14

Who do you usually use for babysitting?

CoalCraft · 22/04/2023 17:14

Only thing I can think of is wait till the summer holidays and send them on a residential summer camp?

Or perhaps you could arrange both DC to be at sleepovers to give you just one night?

Otherwise though, sorry, with no help from family or friends overnight childcare is extremely difficult.

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CornishTiger · 22/04/2023 17:16

Start by finding reliable babysitters and building a support network. Have evenings out together.

Eventually you might be able to gear up to a couple of days away.

PGL might be worth looking at but 6 year old still quite young.

Aerosarethebest · 22/04/2023 17:17

Summer camp for a week? Great idea for the 10 year old anyway. 6 might be a bit young. I’m not sure you’ll find too many options for a residential for them.
Would any friends trade a weekend minibreak? 1 night away not too far away while kids have a sleepover then switch.
Go on a cruise/to a Eurocamp type place and enroll them both in the kids club, then pay a babysitting service for an evening or two.

Original poster
Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 17:18

Clymene · 22/04/2023 17:14

Who do you usually use for babysitting?

Nobody. I have nobody who can. That's the point.

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Minierme · 22/04/2023 17:18

You can get temporary nannies. I also know people who have paid their usual babysitter to do a weekend or an overnight. Build it up gradually. Maybe make an aim to go before next summer and try to cultivate 2 or 3 possible (paid) babysitters before then. Ask them in advance if they ever do overnights.

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 22/04/2023 17:19

If we couldn't use family, we would use our friends, we frequently look after their kids and them with ours. Sort a couple of sleepovers, kids going to different friends if needed and try and get 1 or 2 nights away

neverendinglauaundry · 22/04/2023 17:20

Babysitter, after school club & also we used to take a school day off together for a day out every now and then.

TheNachtzehrer · 22/04/2023 17:20

Don't your DC have friends? Sort a few reciprocal sleepovers. Or it shouldn't be hard to get a babysitter for an evening.

KnickerlessParsons · 22/04/2023 17:20

CornishTiger · 22/04/2023 17:16

Start by finding reliable babysitters and building a support network. Have evenings out together.

Eventually you might be able to gear up to a couple of days away.

PGL might be worth looking at but 6 year old still quite young.

We take Brownies to PGL from 7.

OddBoots · 22/04/2023 17:20

We used PGL, ours were a little older than ours when we started but not by much, I can't remember the youngest age but they can't be far from it.

We started with a weekend and DH and I were staying about 45 min drive away just in case but all was fine.

BunsenBurnerBaby · 22/04/2023 17:20

Take a day off together when they are both in school. And find a babysitter.

HappyAsASandboy · 22/04/2023 17:21

I would start asking around for a local late-teens babysitter. Use them for some evenings out. If you get to trust them, then they will probably do overnight babysitting too.

Otherwise, start inviting your kids friends over for sleepovers, then hope you can arrange two reciprocal sleepovers for the same night. This could be difficult though, depending on your friendships with your kids friends parents.

Enroll them in scouts/cubs/beavers. My kids have occasionally been on camp at the same time.

Summer residential camps (PGL etc?).

Original poster
Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 17:21

TheNachtzehrer · 22/04/2023 17:20

Don't your DC have friends? Sort a few reciprocal sleepovers. Or it shouldn't be hard to get a babysitter for an evening.

Tried this one, nobody seems to want to do sleepovers where we live.

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KnickerlessParsons · 22/04/2023 17:21

TheNachtzehrer · 22/04/2023 17:20

Don't your DC have friends? Sort a few reciprocal sleepovers. Or it shouldn't be hard to get a babysitter for an evening.

But this. We had a network of friends who would have our DDs for a weekend and we'd reciprocate by having theirs.

Can you afford an au pair?

Overthebow · 22/04/2023 17:21

Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 17:18

Nobody. I have nobody who can. That's the point.

Show quote history

there must be babysitters locally who you can pay to babysit for the evening? Otherwise with no family help I’m not sure what else you would do. We have no family nearby so evenings out we use babysitters, for weekends away we take DC to family a few hours away.

Original poster
Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 17:22

Some interesting ideas thank you 😊 just trying to read back through them

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Original poster
Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 17:24

KnickerlessParsons · 22/04/2023 17:21

But this. We had a network of friends who would have our DDs for a weekend and we'd reciprocate by having theirs.

Can you afford an au pair?

Show quote history

I probably could, but I have no room for one!

2 bed house DC share.

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Lovemusic33 · 22/04/2023 17:24

I’ve never had a break from my dc (now 19 and 17), dd is severely autistic and no one wants to look after her, my family will only help out if it’s an emergency (if I’m in hospital), I am a single parent and her dad doesn’t even have her over night. Would love a few days holiday….I would probably run away and not come back.

Ylvamoon · 22/04/2023 17:27

Can they both have play dates (sleepover!!) at the same day?

Clymene · 22/04/2023 17:27

That's why I asked. Smile Set up an account with Sitters. If you find one you really like, book her again and again so that your children are really familiar with her.

Mine was a young primary school teacher who used to do afternoons for me once I'd got to know her. Worked really well.

Original poster
Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 17:27

I've been looking for a local babysitter for evenings for a while, I seem to get lots of interest initially and have then been let down twice. Had a nice girl sit for me once before Christmas and thought I'd cracked it but then she's ghosted me since.

I made sure to bloody pay her well too!

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Fluffyowl00 · 22/04/2023 17:28

Childcare.co.uk have loads of babysitters and nannies listed

Original poster
Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 17:29

Clymene · 22/04/2023 17:27

That's why I asked. Smile Set up an account with Sitters. If you find one you really like, book her again and again so that your children are really familiar with her.

Mine was a young primary school teacher who used to do afternoons for me once I'd got to know her. Worked really well.

Are they reliable? Is it like an agency type arrangement?

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