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Original poster

What do people do for childcare if they've no family help?

85 replies

Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 17:11

Feeling exhausted so be gentle. DC 10 and 6

Desperate for a holiday away from my children. I love them very much but they are with me all.the.time.

My husband is stressed and depressed, I am just fed up of the daily humdrum and the tantrums and rudeness from 10yr old.

I want to take my husband away for some us time. But we have nobody who would care for the children. Not even for a few hours.

I know this is probably a very first world problem and I know I've probably just got to suck it up but just in case, anyone got any ideas?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
roses2 · 22/04/2023 21:02
  • sign them up for scouts. They go away twice a year for a long week end camping
  • pay for a babysitter
SoAndSoSaidSo · 22/04/2023 21:14

We have no one. My BIL is a carer for his girlfriend and lives 1.5hrs away.

Have used / use nursery and breakfast Afterschool club what feels like forever.

Me and DH have not been away by ourselves for many years. My youngest is 7ish, my oldest is 15ish.
We just plod along, but then I'm much more a homebody now.

shivawn · 22/04/2023 21:15

It's so hard having children with no family support, I think you've gotten a lot of helpful replies here so I hope you manage to organise some quality time together. There's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting some time alone as a couple so please don't let anyone make you feel bad about it.

We're extremely fortunate to have good support but I don't like having to ask favours everytime we want to go out. We're trying to find a reliable babysitter at the moment and it's harder than I'd imagined to find someone we're comfortable with so I completely understand it's not as easy as just "get a babysitter".

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10 year olds Families General parenting
newtowelsplease · 22/04/2023 21:39

*Where have i said they're badly behaved?

They're doing normal kid things. I just get no respite.*

You said that no-one you know will do sleepovers with them, that babysitters ghost you, and you described pretty poor behaviour. Seems obvious to me that your kids are a pain.

Original poster
Mustardandchickensandwiches · 22/04/2023 21:52

newtowelsplease · 22/04/2023 21:39

*Where have i said they're badly behaved?

They're doing normal kid things. I just get no respite.*

You said that no-one you know will do sleepovers with them, that babysitters ghost you, and you described pretty poor behaviour. Seems obvious to me that your kids are a pain.

Woah there love, your making a whole load of assumptions there.

Thanks for your suggestions everyone I'm leaving this thread now because the wankers are starting to arrive. ❤️

OP posts:
belladonna22 · 22/04/2023 21:58

We've found some lovely babysitters through the Bubble app.

HeyDiddleDumplings · 22/04/2023 22:01

ditalini · 22/04/2023 17:30

This isn't any good for couple time, but once or twice a year dh or I take our boys away for a couple of nights so that the other can have a break, or take one away for some 1-1 time for both pairs.

Ds1 is now old enough to babysit ds2 now though so we've been able to have hassle free nights out for the last 12 months which has been amazing - your time will come.

This is such a good idea!

I’ve just a week annual leave whist they were at school, as a break. Went for walks, swimming, nice lunch, reading.

HamBone · 22/04/2023 22:12

It’s hard isn’t it, OP. We have a couple of local colleges and universities so we advertised at those-they usually have an area in their websites to post jobs. Found a couple of great babysitters this way and started by leaving the children with them for an hour while we went for a walk, then two hours to have a meal, etc. Eventually we did have a night away and left our babysitter in charge-she was 22 by then and we’d employed her for three years. The children were 10 and 13.

Otherwise we did what others have suggested-took a day off together during term time, had separate weekends away and waited until the children were 12 and 15, and we felt ok leaving them alone for a couple of hours in the evening.

DD is about to turn 18 so we had our first weekend away in January and then another one in March. We have to get a couple more in before she goes to university in the autumn! 😂

Hang in there. 💐

AegonT · 23/04/2023 18:03

We send our 8 year old to PGL but we have a younger one. Still nice just having one at home though!

whatthebejesus · 23/04/2023 18:10

What about doing a couple of spa days? We do this as it's a lot to ask someone to have ours overnight. The only person who would be willing is my mum but it's hard on her now as she's getting older and so i try and avoid it.

We book the kids into breakfast club and then drive to the spa. Spend the day there and pick them up from after school club.

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