Page 5 | Scared to keep co-sleeping

caggie2 · 2023-02-28T17:59:47+00:00

I wish I hadn't seen it but a video came up on my TikTok feed of a women who lost her son Stone to SIDS by bed sharing, and now makes lots of videos sharing her story and warning mums not to do it and saying it only takes one time for your baby to die and how no one thinks it'll happen to them Nearly made me cry, I have a newborn and the only way we're getting any sleep is co-sleeping. We are following the safe sleep 7 but apparently so was she. I feel scared to even go to bed tonight now. I co-slept with my eldest for a year and it was fine but then is that just survivor bias? All the comments were women saying they will never bed share again after watching it and now I just feel so scared and like I'm being a bad mum. He hates being put down. We have a next to me but he won't go in it [sad]

wishuponastar1988 · 01/03/2023 20:30

I saw this video OP and then watched another of hers, the baby fell out of the bed she said and was injured. She did say she had safely Co-slept with her older children.

I Co-sleep and I worry but I am as safe as possible (actually safer for me to co-sleep than feed sat up as I have fallen asleep doing that a couple of times which is not safe!)

suzyscat · 01/03/2023 20:32

You can get those tempest bed barrier/ mesh guard rail attachments for a double bed.

Emmamoo89 · 01/03/2023 21:03

I loved co sleeping x

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 01/03/2023 21:45

110APiccadilly · 01/03/2023 20:01

I shared my experience about not co-sleeping, as requested by the OP in a subsequent comment.

I'm actually appalled at your comment, suggesting that by following safe sleep guidance, which for me meant no co-sleeping, ever, because of my babies' particular circumstances, their bond with me will be weaker. Fortunately I know you're talking rubbish. I hope everyone else in my situation (i.e. unable to safely co-sleep) who reads your comment realises that too.

You're certainly not a model of empathy at any rate, however you've chosen to parent.

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Don't know what you've got yourself in a tizz about. You were happy to put down your friends by saying your kids sleep much better (very patronising btw) and I'm saying it could be that their attachment and bond with their kids may be stronger. I don't know why you're "appalled" because it would seem that being close in bed together all snuggly and cosy could lead to that. Don't you think? But for you, the win is having a child that sleeps isolated in their room all night after you've trained them to do that.
Which Is fair enough. But I like my child to know what if he's scared and wants to come to my bed, he can. And when he wakes up and smiles at me I know I'm doing the right thing for him.
I actually laughed out loud and your comment about me having lack of empathy. My mum would look at you as if you had two heads because it can't be further from the truth.
I just can't be bothered with the smugness that you spout about a better sleeping child without you thinking about other elements. Which clearly you haven't. You just put the weight all on a child sleeping through the night. I put it on making sure my child feels secure and safe

110APiccadilly · 02/03/2023 01:02

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 01/03/2023 21:45

Don't know what you've got yourself in a tizz about. You were happy to put down your friends by saying your kids sleep much better (very patronising btw) and I'm saying it could be that their attachment and bond with their kids may be stronger. I don't know why you're "appalled" because it would seem that being close in bed together all snuggly and cosy could lead to that. Don't you think? But for you, the win is having a child that sleeps isolated in their room all night after you've trained them to do that.
Which Is fair enough. But I like my child to know what if he's scared and wants to come to my bed, he can. And when he wakes up and smiles at me I know I'm doing the right thing for him.
I actually laughed out loud and your comment about me having lack of empathy. My mum would look at you as if you had two heads because it can't be further from the truth.
I just can't be bothered with the smugness that you spout about a better sleeping child without you thinking about other elements. Which clearly you haven't. You just put the weight all on a child sleeping through the night. I put it on making sure my child feels secure and safe

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I put the weight, as it happens, on my child being alive. Read again why I didn't co-sleep. I was not able to be all lovely and snuggly in bed with my children and also keep them safe. How nice for you that you were able to do that, maybe try having some empathy for people who couldn't.

I also wasn't putting my friends down. They had more sleep with a newborn and I have more sleep now. How you can see that as putting anyone down I've no idea.