Formula

[ToniMuir]

Hi there.. totally new to this! My wife and I are expecting our first baby together. We are a lesbian couple, and my wife is carrying our child conceived through stimulated IUI.

im wondering what the best formula to use is? I know the benefits etc of breastfeeding, but we really would rather formula feed. Recommendations please?

😴😴😴😴😴😴😴😴

You mean when I was unable to feed my baby born with severe cleft?
I certainly tried. It was a horrible, horrible time. Surgeries, travelling, two other young children to care for, trying to pump.

Thank you for mocking me for it.
Just shows what sort of person you really are.

Just rise above them. Not worth it. Hope you're okay x

Not cool, @WindingRoadEveryday she said her little baby was born without a mouth ffs.

Yes you knowingly fed your baby contaminants like inhaling cigarette smoke (your own words). Breast is best. You could’ve pumped or gotten breastmilk from a milk bank. Your DC didn’t get the physical and mental benefits of breastmilk and you did know better hence trying to ‘educate’ everyone here. Presumably they now have a litany of health issues and an awful immune system.

Don't keep going. It's obvious what you're trying to say but it's not coming across well. At all.

Well my baby was in NICU and I tried incredibly hard to breastfeed. But it’s fine for @Redebs to tell me that giving my baby formula is like letting her inhale cigarette smoke, say I am uneducated and she is giving me ‘the facts’ and say that there are clear physical and mental benefits from breastmilk my baby isn’t getting. No issues there?

You are going too far.

I don't agree with @Redebs and I see what point you're trying to make but her DC was poorly and it's below the belt.

Just stop.

@SouthLondonMum22 my dc was poorly but it didn’t stop her coming on this thread telling formula fed mums they give their baby containers and giving formula is like letting a baby inhale cigarette smoke. She can get on her high horse about others babies and breastfeeding experiences but her own is off limits?

I'm sorry your baby was in NICU. That must have been really hard. I also tried to breastfeed but it just didn't work out. Both my babies have thrived on formula (which I agree cannot be compared to cigarette smoke, as it is not harmful to children!!) But equally they don't get the benefits from breast milk. But you know, long term I don't really see that as a big deal. I agree with your point of view I just don't think the way you've started it is very fair.

She didn't mean it like that at all. But no you are trying to goad her for a reaction. Its not on. She didn't know your dc were poorly but you knew hers were.

Well I hope a lesson has been learnt about criticising and belittling other mothers and telling them that they fed their babies containments akin to letting them inhale cigarette smoke and and have disadvantaged them when she knows nothing about those mothers circumstances 🙄 amazing how it’s fine to dish it out and judge/upset other mothers.

No one should judge. Mothers shouldn't be attacking other mothers. Should be uplifting each other but it'll never be like that. I'm sorry about your dc

No one should judge? From you of all posters. Give me a break! You do nothing but stop short of harassing other mothers about breastfeeding on this board and when I said my baby hasn’t been ill told me that bad for my babies immune system. Missing the part where you ‘uplifted’ me? 🙄

Trying to make peace. Wtaf should I bother. I've done fuck all. Harassed no one. Read back everything you've posted before telling me that I've judged 🙄🙄

you posted on this thread about brands of formula and how op was not going to breastfeed specifically to say how much better breastfeeding was. Was that to ‘uplift’ the op too?

Just my opinion 🤷‍♀️

Come on, there's a difference. Like I said, I don't agree with what she's said at all (other than what we all know about breastfeeding) but she was also clear that she used formula when she felt like she didn't have a choice, which is what you also did when you had a poorly baby.

She was speaking generally and didn't know about your personal circumstances but you took her poorly baby and used them to lash out at her.

Do I agree with what she said about comparing to smoking and her not giving it a rest? Not at all but you can put how you feel forward without getting so personal about her DC even though I completely understand how personal it must feel for you.

She was speaking generally and didn't know about your personal circumstances

exactly. Happy to dish it out to other mothers despite knowing nothing about their personal circumstances and how hurtful her words may be, without caring how many mothers she affects, how much guilt and upset she is causing. Couldn’t care less as it’s not directed at her!

@WindingRoadEveryday I feel like she was clearly talking about those who choose not to breastfeed, like OP and myself. Not those who tried to breastfeed and then had no choice but to use formula.

Again, not that I agree. I think giving women a choice what to do with their own bodies is always a good and positive thing.

I think it was the benefits of colostrum (harvesting and giving via syringe) which isn’t actually ‘breastfeeding but gives a great boost initially to baby

Choice is good but informed choice is best that’s all the poster who said about colostrum was doing - kindly giving some facts to try and help

Thank you. That's all I was doing.

Maybe once. But multiple times even when OP came back and asked her to stop? I wouldn't call that kind or trying to help.