I keep being told that my baby will nap for longer than half an hour one day. She's nine months old and it still hasn't happened yet.

[Pugletpops]

Unless I hold her, she will only do thirty minutes. I have tried everything apart from CIO. In her cot, the moving car or pram, thirty minutes. In my arms on the sofa, two hours.

She sleeps brilliantly through the night but I need a break during the day. I have tried blackout curtains, white noise, sleep suit. Ferber, a schedule, following her sleepy cues. Increasing wake windows, shortening them. Today I kept her awake from her 7.20am wake up and her first nap was 11.30am, nope, still only thirty minutes. I've tried wake to sleep, resettling her, waiting for twenty eight minutes and then shushing her into the next cycle. I've tried crib hour. Her nappy is changed, she is not due a feed, the temperature is fine. Nothing. Dummy in her mouth, spare in the cot. I ended up obsessing over the perfect nap cycle and often cried every day from exhaustion so just had to accept one independent half hour nap, and one long contact nap on the sofa.

Any one have a baby like this? Her cousin, who is two weeks older, will do long independent naps but sleeps badly through the night. Should I just pick my battles and be happy she sleeps 8pm - 7.20am and very rarely wakes in the night?

Unfortunately some babies just like contact naps, mine was this way for most of the time after 4/5 months and it annoyed the crap out of me. In the end I chose to accept that it was going to be that way and it made it less frustrating for me.

Sorry I don't have any magic solution for you

How long do you leave it before going in when she wakes after half an hour? I know you haven't done CIO, but are you leaving her for a few mins to see if she settles again or going straight in?

I'd be reluctant to mess too much with her nap time given she sleeps well at night. Can you change the contact napping position so that she's next to you (touching) rather than on you, so you can at least have your arms free (and then have a cup of tea and watch Netflix/scroll mumsnet for a couple of hours).

I have noticed anecdotally that babies that nap badly seem to sleep well at night. I’ve had two great nappers who were hideous at night. I have to wake them from naps to get halfway decent night sleep. Honestly I wouldn’t rock the boat if I were you! If she seems happy and rested I’d just enjoy the uninterrupted nights!

Sounds like DC1, except she wouldn't even nap in my arms for more than about 20 minutes, only when she was on the move in the pram - and she knew when you'd stopped! It's not much fun trudging round pushing the pram for two hours in winter 🥶

I ended up accepting it, but it meant a difficult start to nursery as even with their magic sleep powers it took them about 6 months to get her to reliably nap for an hour midday, so she was always absolutely exhausted at pickup. Are you going back to work? If yes, you'll be happy to have a baby who sleeps through!

Mine is 7 months and was like this up until a few weeks ago. I found it so stressful trying to put him down and then him having short naps that I just decided to embrace the cuddles. Get set up on the sofa with snacks drinks TV/book and try to enjoy it.

He started finding it really difficult to settle so I tried him in the cot. It will happen eventually but it’s different for every baby.

My eldest suddenly broke through the 40 minute barrier at ten months. It will happen eventually.

My ds dropped naps altogether at that age, plus he didn't sleep well at night.
I'd say accept it, hopefully you'll feel less frustrated then.

1. Embrace the naps on you- have some down time whilst she sleeps on you.

2.Sling wear for getting jobs done around the house.

1. Invest in a decent play pen, for when you need to nip to the loo etc....

1. Is she happy in a pram? Can you get some time for you, by getting out and meeting up with friends etc....

She may never nap for longer, but she will learn to entertain herself, so you may be able to put her in her cot to rest, even if she doesn't actually sleep. But honestly she is only 9 months and you are getting over 11 hours at night, plus a half an hour nap- that's really not that bad.

I've waited 10 - 15 minutes, but to be honest once she rolls onto her side and sits up I know it's game over

This was me. I was at my wits end. Tried everything.

All of a sudden she consolidated her naps! We did nothing different, one day it just happened and she'll go 60-120 mins now. She was around 9/10 months and is 14 months now.

Hope yours decides to do this out of the blue too :) sending a hug I know it's tough.

Mine started napping longer once she started nursery, she was about 11 months old. She was such a nightmare to put to sleep at home, and never had any issues there 🙄

Is she crawling or walking yet? One of mine was an appalling napper but when they started moving it was a game changer. 2 hour naps followed until they started school!

Mine slept through at six weeks. Daytime a different matter. Up at 7am till after lunch then would doze, fall asleep suddenly some days.

He's Forty now up at 6am in bed by 9pm . He's not going to change now 😃

My second DD was like this. First DD would nap for hours and I'd end up poking her to make sure she was still alive! Lulled me into a false sense of security and then second DD came along who would only do very short power naps. I'd put her down and 15 mins later - ping! wide awake! I always say if I'd had her first, I'd have stopped at one.

My first only ever had 1 nap- but 3ish hours from 11:30! I’d have a nap, do housework and make the tea. Second, never more than 20-30 mins. Such a shock! Even contact naps, no more than 30 mins. At nearly 2, I’m having
to accept it’s never going to happen!

I understand you're tired OP but I'd take a full nights sleep over a napper any day. My first rarely napped for more than half an hour, and he woke 3-4 times a night. For two and a half years. It just sounds like she has sufficient rest overnight. I know it doesn't seem like it, but you're blessed!

That’s like my 14 month old DD, we just do contact naps and watch TV. On nursery days she doesn’t nap well and is exhausted at night.

Definitely prefer an unbroken sleep overnight to longer daytime naps.

I had a shit napper too OP. It's so hard, even if you are getting a good night's sleep (which I also wasn't). The days seem to go on forever and you can't get anything done. It improved at 11 months for us when she went down to one nap and I started putting her down for them in our bed (out of sheer desperation). I would lie next to her as if co sleeping to get her off to sleep, she'd then do 1-2 hours. She stopped napping altogether at 2.5. Some babies just hate naps!

That was my experience, my crappie napper has slept through almost every night since he was 2.5years (over 2 years now).

My 2 DC never napped for longer than half an hour and gave up napping altogether between 18 months and 2 years. Neither slept particularly well at night either. Might not seem great at the time but in the scheme of things it’s very short lived. I know that’s easy to say with retrospect though!

What's he awake time before putting down for a nap. Could be over tired

My oldest was like this at 9 months. At 10/11 months we transitioned to one nap and she started sleeping for an hour and a half.

Mine only ever had 1x 30 minute (max) nap, unless in my arms (that stopped at 9 months when I went back to work). Sorry!

This was my experience with DS. Would sleep on an outside walk or in my arms but otherwise 30 mins max. Then he'd be too tired to eat and too hungry to sleep.

At about 6 months I started going to bed with him for afternoon nap, game changer. Its not ideal and useless if you have other dc to care for but at least you get to sleep too.

Unfortunately it didn't really get better but we got to the point where naps were no longer needed.

Ds napped for three hours every day between 2-5 until he was almost 4. Those hours saved my sanity. Dd came and I fully expected the same daily afternoon break. Nope, she never napped more than 30 minutes, you couldn’t put her down and she dropped day time naps altogether at 18 months 😩. Sadly I think some babies are just like this.