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Parenting

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Original poster

Positive stories of having two+ boys

77 replies

Algor1thm · 27/12/2022 08:11

I'm having my second little boy and final baby. I've had a lot of negative responses to telling people the gender. My dad went on at length about how he was disappointed for us because having two boys is such a nightmare (they'll be loud and boisterous and fight with each other) and a girl would have been so much easier. Most other people have said that now I'll need to have a third (I won't be) or some other form of commiseration. Lots of comments about how boys grow up and leave you and basically don't give a shit about you as an adult.

Please can I hear your positive stories of having two or more boys? As little ones or teenagers or adult children. Mine will have a 3 year age gap.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

CandyflossKid · 27/12/2022 08:18

I have twin boys - wouldn't have changed it for anything. They have always got on and had the same interests etc. I never wanted anymore children after I had them.

RudsyFarmer · 27/12/2022 08:21

Mine do fight like cats and dogs but are also great fun and love me intensely. The leaving me thing when I’m older isn’t a thing for me as I’ll be pensionable age and blimming grateful for some peace. So personally there’s no downside.

Yoyooo · 27/12/2022 08:23

Girls are more hard work than boys!

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Tonsiltrouble · 27/12/2022 08:24

Two boys here. Two lovely, full on, noisy balls of fun. They do fight, but they also have a lovely relationship with each other, are very cuddly and share a lot of interests. They can be very sweet and kind to each other, but they can also get physical because they want the exact same block of Lego (out of the 5 million blocks we have). I wouldn’t change it.

BabyFour2023 · 27/12/2022 08:24

RudsyFarmer · 27/12/2022 08:21

This! Mine are 19 months apart and completely inseparable. The very best of friends but they do fight sometimes. They have the same interests, share absolutely everything and utterly adore one another. Boys are fantastic.

FWIW; my husband is one of 3 boys and all 3 see my MIL & FIL at least once a week. We’ve just spent Christmas with them, as well as my family, and it was brilliant.

MsChatterbox · 27/12/2022 08:25

I have a boy and girl and they fight too so I don't think it's limited to boys!

stairgates · 27/12/2022 08:27

Brothers and sisters fight just as much. Charlie and Lola is a daydream😁

TheYummyPatler · 27/12/2022 08:28

i have three sons. They’re lovely.

It’s also nonsense that sons don’t give a shit about their mothers but daughters are a best friend for life. It’s not even true that grandchildren will necessarily be closer to maternal grandparents - it all depends very much on the range of personalities involved.

All kids grow up and make their own lives. You can fit into that. Boys or girls.

PollyEsther · 27/12/2022 08:30

My three boys never fight. The oldest two did a bit when they were much younger, but still nowhere as much as my youngest son and DD fight now. We literally have to ban them from being in the same room! I never had to do that with just the boys.

Boys are great. I’ve loved having teen boys too, they’re great company, have a wicked sense of humour and they’re (mostly) sensible and very kind.

AFingerofFudge · 27/12/2022 08:33

I have 3 boys, now 23,20 and 14. They are all very different to each other but get on fantastically well. They've always adored DS3 despite the age gap. They definitely had some small fights and periods where they just seemed to do things separately but they have always, generally speaking, got on.
DS2 has challenged us in that he has what we now understand to be ND behaviour but he is still a joy!

WeDontNeedToTalkAboutJamie · 27/12/2022 08:34

My nieces fight more times in one day than my boys have in their lifetime.

Mine (18 and 16) both claim to hate each other, and wish the other had never been born. But actually they are very close. I love hearing them laugh together.

mel787 · 27/12/2022 08:38

I have a boy and girl and they kill each other. My friend has 2 boys and they do have the odd fight but play so much nicer than my two.

HowDoYouOwnDisorder · 27/12/2022 08:39

I have two boys, now 18 and 20, and they have been and are fab

Love having boys

MedComms · 27/12/2022 08:40

I have two boys with a theee year age gap and it’s the best! They fight a bit and can be extremely boisterous but they have a fantastic relationship and are the best of friends

rwalker · 27/12/2022 08:42

2 boys 2 years apart always got on like a house on fire there late teens early 20’s now
Go out together
when they were small brilliant same toys same interest clothes past down
If I could choose have both the same

GoingtotheWinchester · 27/12/2022 08:46

I havre two boys who get on brilliantly - my friends with opposite sex siblings have far more issues.

Personalities and parenting play a huge role in how well your kids get on. Ignore the arseholes with their doom and gloom crap.

Talipesmum · 27/12/2022 08:48

Two boys, two years apart. They’re 14 and 12 now. Gorgeous and lovely. They don’t fight - hardly at all anyway - and they’re not “just boys” - they are their own separate people. Totally different personalities. One is completely gentle and calm, geeky, funny, uncompetitive. The other is chatty, sociable, loves to win, loves the drama but also loves downtime. One of them - I can read his mind cos he’s so like me. The other is a constant stream of surprise and delight! Who knows how it will all be in 10, 20 years. But I love my boys - they’re so different but they get on so well, have plenty of common and different interests. They’re their own people - their personalities are far more important than them being “boys” - that’s not a personality.

Merryclaire · 27/12/2022 08:56

Wow people are mean. I just have one DD but I know several very proud mums of clans of boys who wouldn’t have it any other way. All children are different individuals and most of the families I know don’t have 2 or 3 “boisterous” boys, they differ a lot in personality. Some are more sensitive and gentle, while others possess those more typical ‘boy’ traits. But they all adore their mums.

That old saying of a son is only a son until he gets a wife is sometimes true but that’s usually more to do with MIL and DIL not getting on - and the idea that men aren’t as consistent with communication. I know plenty of adult males still close to their mums.

congratulations

needabreak5 · 27/12/2022 09:02

DH is one of two boys and is very close to his brother, we are all very close to their parents. We have two young DC boys who spend much more time with DH’s parents than my mum and dad.

buddy79 · 27/12/2022 09:04

I originally wanted a daughter and I have 2 boys, 8 and 4. They are the joy of my life. My eldest is sensitive, giving and affectionate, my youngest is determined, funny, and also affectionate! They squabble at times but are also the first to comfort each other, make each other laugh, they share some toys and interests but not everything, just like any siblings. They do already seem to have less of the complicated friendship issues girls can have, though maybe this is a generalisation, and yes they do seem mostly to adore me in a very uncomplicated way which is so nice!! I wouldn’t have it any other way.

justasking111 · 27/12/2022 09:08

They're easier as teenagers than girls I'm told.

My three are now men as children they were close, yes they argued but they shared so much. As men in stable relationships they're still close.

olympicsrock · 27/12/2022 09:11

I have two boys 3.5 years apart. I am so happy it happened this way. They love each other , enjoy the same activities and clubs , play together , hand down toys and clothes. So much easier logistically and financially .
They are also both very loving children - I wouldn’t change it for the world.

BeingHappy · 27/12/2022 09:17

Not my own story, but my aunt's. She has 3 boys (19, 15, 8 years old). Her eldest is very caring, although away at university he comes home most weekends. My aunt recently had to have a lung operation and he's been very attentive and looked after her wonderfully. Her youngest is equally just in love with his mumma. Not much to say about her 15 year old just now because he's definitely going through his reclusive teenage phase... We're fairly close to our cousin's and I don't recall them tearing the house down ever. Her youngest loves his big brother and the big brother takes care of the little one really well too.

I can see how they may not have the most sensitive touch as boys but they're very loving, kind and respectful. Don't let anyone scare you! My aunt also hasn't had the most amazing marriage (an awful and aggressive husband who hasn't been a very hands on dad) and developed some mental health issues which has been sadly attributed to having lived a life with her husband and still managed to raise some very lovely boys.

BeingHappy · 27/12/2022 09:22

Also wanted to add, my dad is in his late 60s and visits his unwell mum about 4 times a week. He comes from a family of 7(!!) brothers. Most are very close to each other and speak on the phone several times a week and all live maybe within 20 minutes of each other. Families of all boys can definitely be close and full of love!

hoochyhag · 27/12/2022 09:24

I have three boys, they are and always have been, gorgeous

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