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Original poster

Nursery worker tapped daughter

104 replies

TeaHotorCold · 14/12/2022 18:23

Hi all

i want to know if i'm overreacting. When i picked up my toddler (16months) just now, the nursery worker was telling me about her day and said that she has started to be more confident, sometimes going up to other children and tapping their head. Which of course i was worried about but when she told me that, she basically demonstrated and tapped my DD's head! whilst i was carrying her. DD immediately just leant against my chest for a cuddle.

I WISHED i had said something then. I should have I know, i don't know why i didn't i think I was just shocked. Am i overreacting here? My husband says yes because she didn't mean to cause any harm. I am thinking of speaking to the nursery worker tomorrow morning but it just makes me upset that they actually think this is ok? I'm a FTM.

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SavingKitten · 14/12/2022 18:54

TeaHotorCold · 14/12/2022 18:33

@pbdr more like lightly hit.

Lightly hit doesn’t make a thud like you said. You are totally overreacting

Potato28 · 14/12/2022 18:54

You heard a ‘thud’ ??? An actual Thud?
You would have to hit someone very hard in the head to make a ‘thud’ sound

Sunnytwobridges · 14/12/2022 18:55

I would be livid and I'm far from an over protective parent. I thought you meant a light tap on the head, I wouldn't be down with someone hit my child in the head. What was the point?

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snowbellsxox · 14/12/2022 18:55

I wouldn't allow any adult to tap my child on the head or even lay a finger on them in this way. It was unnecessary and unprofessional

Pineconederby · 14/12/2022 18:56

Ignore the obvious haters and naysayers, OP. She should have described to you what happened, not hit your child. I’d be removing my child and telling the nursery chain why. If this is what she does in front of parents, God knows what she thinks is good practice and what goes on behind the scenes. Despicable and goes completely against any safeguarding training I’ve ever done.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 14/12/2022 18:57

How is a small child expected to understand that they are not supposed to tap other kids on their heads when a person in authority can do it to them?

Mrsuntidy · 14/12/2022 18:58

🫤🫤🫤🫤 If it was as bad as you say then YABU for not saying anything then. You will look mad saying something the next day. If the child didn't cry then I am sure it wasn't as bad as you're making out.

DiaDeLluvia · 14/12/2022 18:59

I’m between the two extremes. Not an ideal way to explain but prob just a brief lapse in judgment. If you feel you want to say something, do it, but maybe in a low key way

Notanotherone6 · 14/12/2022 19:09

Potato28 · 14/12/2022 18:54

You heard a ‘thud’ ??? An actual Thud?
You would have to hit someone very hard in the head to make a ‘thud’ sound

You don't. I've just tested it on my 5 year old. She was laughing because it doesn't hurt in the slightest.

Irridescantshimmmer · 14/12/2022 19:12

A tap is nothing to be concerned about.

toomuchlaundry · 14/12/2022 19:16

If she had hit her hard surely she would have cried

MrsTerryPratchett · 14/12/2022 19:17

snowballer · 14/12/2022 18:27

I'm a FTM.

You don't say... sorry but unless they smacked your DC round the head, you're being absolutely ridiculous.

I was going to say, "no shit Sherlock" as well.

A 'thud'? Or a very small noise. A tapping noise.

Theydoyaknow · 14/12/2022 19:23

Jesus fucking wept, give me strength.

pairofrollerskates · 14/12/2022 19:24

maddiemookins16mum · 14/12/2022 18:48

There was no need for her to tap your wains head. If she was keen to demonstrate, she could have tapped herself.

exactly!

Saltywalruss · 14/12/2022 19:25

fairydustt · 14/12/2022 18:36

Isn't this how kids learn not to do things to others that they wouldn't like done to them?

No

Mariposista · 14/12/2022 19:26

PFB alert.

LadyKenya · 14/12/2022 19:33

Over the top reaction. You should have said something at the time, if you were unhappy.

Puzzledstill · 14/12/2022 19:38

The fact your daughter leaned into you says she did not like it

VivaVivaa · 14/12/2022 19:38

Weird situation. I think it was probably a bit odd of the nursery worker to do that, especially as it’s undesirable behaviour from your DD. I wouldn’t be upset though and I don’t think I would say anything, just chalk it up as one of life’s odd interactions and keep an open mind about the nursery going forward.

Baublesandtinsel · 14/12/2022 19:39

You should beable to tell the difference between a tap and hit straight away if she was hit surely you natural instinct would kick in straight away and you would off said/protected your child. And if it really was as hard as you now feel it was why would you send her back their?

EscapeRoomToTheSun · 14/12/2022 19:40

Imogensmumma · 14/12/2022 18:34

Wow what a way to ignore the fact your child is being told to quit doing a desirable action. Can’t handle home truths about your DD not being perfect so finding someone to blame for something else

Use it as an opportunity to tell your DD not to tap other kids on your head as she didn’t like it either!!

😂😂😂

Did u miss the fact that the child is like literally 1. Chill your beans babes.

moggerhanger · 14/12/2022 19:46

What's FTM?

Original poster
TeaHotorCold · 14/12/2022 19:49

@Imogensmumma wow your message is untrue and full of assumptions. I was holding her at the time after the nursery worker passed her to me - Nursery worker and I were both standing. How exactly would DD understand at that moment not to tap other kids' head? I'm talking about the actions of an adult vs a 16 month old here.

and please, throwing the comment about 'home truths' around and me trying to then blame this on the nursery worker. you couldn't be more wrong.

@cansu i wasn't planning to complain to mgmt but i wanted to speak to the nursery worker tomorrow. I don't feel comfortable her doing it again. there must be better ways to teach a toddler

OP posts:
Cuppasoupmonster · 14/12/2022 19:50

SirChenjins · 14/12/2022 18:47

You are not overreacting - please know this. There was no need to demonstrate on your child and it will cause confusion for her.

Why?

toomuchlaundry · 14/12/2022 19:50

FTM = first time mum