Would you put off conceiving to avoid a summer born child?

[Algor1thm]

We're ready to try for our second, but have realised that Aug-Nov conceptions lead to summer born babies. Summer born children statistically have worse academic outcomes than those born earlier in the school year. You can now request a deferral, but I gather this can be quite a difficult process with no guarantees. Our first is late autumn/early winter born and I'm very glad they will be closer to 5 when they start school.

However my husband doesn't want to wait until Dec/Jan to start trying as we're already looking at a fairly large age gap, and he pointed out we don't know how long it'll take us to conceive/we could experience pregnancy loss which would set us back etc. We're in our early-mid 30s so not old, but we are several years older than the last time we ttc, so I don't want to assume it'll be straightforward.

Particularly interested to hear from summer borns... do you think we should wait a few more months for the benefit of having an autumn rather than summer born child?

I'm an August birthday and was in the top set for everything at school, was definitely not behind. I'd concentrate on trying to conceive a healthy baby

Although I'm slightly hypocritical here as I tried to avoid a Dec/Jan baby at all costs 😂

Glad my parent didn't think like this cos l wouldn't be here now!

Being academic isn't the be all and end all and actually l would be so grateful to have had a 2nd child, l wouldn't have cared when they were born.

Go for now op!

No, our eldest is summer born. Recently turned 4, won't be starting reception until the term after they turn 5 though. Have a look at the Facebook group 'flexible school admissions for summer born children'.

In the grand scheme of things and in the nicest way this doesn't matter and is really the least of your worries. My birthday is end of June, no issues did well above average. I know of many others born June-august who are the same.

I wouldn't delay TTC. You don't know how long it will take, if there will be any issues along the way etc, all for the sake of avoiding a few months out of the year..

No I would. not. I had trouble conceiving so was just happy to have a child and didn’t care when her birthday was.

Guess it depends on whether you think being academic is the most important thing. Having said that as a teacher I have taught many summer borns who have been the top of the class so it’s not a given that summer borns will struggle. There are a huge number of factors that effect children’s attainment, for example socio-economic background has a much bigger influence.

As someone who has seen people struggle to conceive, miscarry and have very early babies it’s not something I worried about too much, as felt there were too many variables.

Have a summer born. They struggled in reception but then caught up by Y2 and out paced their peers by y4.

Key is keeping their self confidence up so they see themselves as learners.

I am a teacher and have taught across the primary age range. The summer born effect definitely lessens as they go up the school.

Dc1 is summer born and about to go into Y4. He's academically ahead of a lot of his class mates and has been since reception.

Dc2 is autumn born and has another year before he starts school. I'm so glad he wasn't born a couple of months earlier because there would be absolutely no way he would be ready to go to school this September.

It absolutely depends on the child.

It took a long time for me to conceive both dc so I would have never considered planning around dates, and you just don't know when it's going to happen.

My Summer born DS struggled massively. Turned out he was dyslexic but I think it would have been picked up a lot sooner if teachers weren’t always saying “he’s young for the year, he will catch up”. When we moved to Aus he went down a year to be in the correct grade and it was the best thing that ever happened to him. I see there is now flexibility so it is probably less of an issue.

My Summer born DH on the other hand found it to be a big advantage when he was often the youngest person to achieve something professionally.

This is not like an Amazon delivery. You can't guarantee you'll conceive just when you want to.

A friend's DS was due 1st October but was born 31st August so is very young in the year. No struggles at all.

I have a November and a June baby. Both are equally academic and neither struggled at school (though a June birthday can clash with exams).

Just crack on with it.

I have a friend who very smugly told me she'd purposely timed TTC for a September baby so she'd be oldest in the year... born 8 weeks early, so depending how strongly you feel about it you'd have to wait until Feb/March to guarantee, then your TTC window is getting small before the next year of summer babies!
Not sure it's worth it. If you are ready I'd go for it now.

This is so weird. Yes statistically summer children do slightly worse, but its a small variance on a population size variable that is anyqay adjusted for on exams etc there are so many more factors that determine how an individual child will actually perform academically that even if this is the most important thing to you, this is not the way you would secure "success".

My eldest is January, which in Scotland is the equivalent of summer born, and was the youngest in her class. Which is a side note - if you ever move to Scotland then your child would be bang in middle of the year! She has struggled a bit, I do notice a difference, but I think it will balance over the piece. I wanted to defer her, but at 4 she had an established wee group of friends going up from nursery with her, and was very tall, so I felt keeping her another year would have negative impacts. I’m hoping to conceive DC3 soon and hoping for a summer, both for where it sits them academically in the Scottish system and more importantly, for outdoor parties! Poor DC1 has had a few snowy bdays.

We've just had a July baby last month & both DH and I are not worried as we are both summer born & yet did great at school. I think parents can play a bigger role in helping summer borns catch up at home as there's soo much a teacher handling 25 other kids can do for you.

I'd definitely avoid December/Jan baby if I could.

As there's only so much a teacher handling 25 other kids can do for you**

My daughter is a July baby and she is quite ahead of some of her peers in terms of development.

I'm due in September and would quite prefer her to come In august for the year less of nursery fees!

I'm summer born and so is my DD and I've always thought this is such an odd thing to worry about. People are so different and there are so many other factors that influence your life, rather than the month you are born. I agree with your husband. Good luck, OP.

I'm in an 11+ area. My son (late August birthday) will probably get into the grammar school but, if he's borderline, the summer-born weighting will get him in, no bother.

There's nothing in the air that makes summer-born children underperform. Look to the statistical reasons why, and take steps to negate them. Lots of reading is a good start.

It depends on the child more than when they were born. I'm a summer baby and was bored to tears in school for a long time, less so in secondary but still got top marks without much effort. My sibling was an autumn/winter baby and didn't do as well.
My dd is autumn and will find it worse than me I expect as is very bright, she wants to go to school already but I do think she'll struggle as she's not 3 yet and can do a lot of the stuff they start to learn at school already.
I'd just get on with it if I were you!

No I wouldn't put it off. As you say there are a lot of unknowns, you might struggle to conceive and end up at this time next year again. You can't really control nature.

Good advice, sometimes in life you can’t plan.

So many people I have spoken too over the years, have fallen quickly with their first, but not had the same experience conceiving following pregnancies.

Good luck OP.

Agree with @Notajogger. It's down to each child. My august born is way ahead of where she should be academically. My late December baby is behind but is sporty which may cause problems if she competes as the age runs jan-dec for that. Feels like you can't win!

I personally wouldn't plan a child around the school year.

I couldn’t have planned it better, DC1 due middle of September.
Until decided to make an appearance a few weeks early and was born right at the end of August. Has always been the youngest at whatever school he’s attended.
He’s a bright spark though, and super sociable.

Completely up to you! I'm a December born and for the likes of birthday parties etc everyone was/is too busy to come celebrate. My friend is summer born has been fine through school. I have a summer born (struggled to conceive so the time of year baby was going to be born was very low down on my priorities).
There's much more to life than academics!
Outside sports clubs go by year of birth not school year.
I Loved being able to go out most days when baby was little (bright sunny days make me happy) rather than being stuck in the house with a newborn as it's dark and raining. Summer birthday parties.
She's no different to her peers and she won't have a deferred place at school.