Would you put off conceiving to avoid a summer born child?

[Algor1thm]

We're ready to try for our second, but have realised that Aug-Nov conceptions lead to summer born babies. Summer born children statistically have worse academic outcomes than those born earlier in the school year. You can now request a deferral, but I gather this can be quite a difficult process with no guarantees. Our first is late autumn/early winter born and I'm very glad they will be closer to 5 when they start school.

However my husband doesn't want to wait until Dec/Jan to start trying as we're already looking at a fairly large age gap, and he pointed out we don't know how long it'll take us to conceive/we could experience pregnancy loss which would set us back etc. We're in our early-mid 30s so not old, but we are several years older than the last time we ttc, so I don't want to assume it'll be straightforward.

Particularly interested to hear from summer borns... do you think we should wait a few more months for the benefit of having an autumn rather than summer born child?

I realise I have a sample size of one but my DD1 who is 12 today has consistently performed brilliantly at school. I was aiming for a September baby but got my timings wrong and I'm so happy she's August (and she loves her birthday being in the summer holidays!)

I am summer born, both my kids were summer born.
It wasn't intentional, but if I'd thought of it, I would have tried to choose summer born.

Academically, I actually started school early & never had issues keeping up, but I was a little young emotionally for the first few years.

My kids also had no issues with the academics, but were 'younger' than others.
By secondary school that difference had disappeared.

On the plus side, it's fab having summer birthdays.
Never overshadowed by Christmas, Easter etc.. so you never get the dreaded 'joint Christmas/Birthday present' going on my Dec born sister suffers from even as an adult, nicer weather so you can usually go out, it breaks up the year & long after you have grown up, those things still stay true.

🙄

Nope, because if you go for a September or October baby, and they arrive early, you have a prem baby who is the youngest in the year.
And conception doesn't work on demand. After loosing a pregnancy, the cliché of a successful pregnancy, with a baby to carry out of the hospital was the aim.

I have a May and August. Both planned. I wanted them to have summer birthdays. I didn't think about school at the time even though myself and siblings were all born in July 😬

My daughter started school just after her 4th birthday and she's exceeding in all areas so it doesn't always hold them back

I wouldn't put off. I actually wanted a Summer child, because Summer is a nice time to have a birthday party! :) But things worked out differently.

I work in a primary school and would 100% recommend trying to conceive an autumn born. There is a marked difference between most summer and autumn born children during the first 4 years of school - whether academically or emotional/social.

@Alloutatsea are you saying those dc don't catch up?

The evidence shows that not until secondary school. Of course this is not for all summer-born children but for the majority. We are also one of the few countries who send children to school at 4, most others it is 6. I just think if you have the choice then why wouldn't you try for autumn

Yes, 3 autumn/winter babies all planned to avoid being in the younger half of the year.

Summer babies Elon Musk, Warren Buffett & Larry Ellison haven't done that bad 😆

I read recently that summer born are healthier & taller vs winter babies. Autumn babies apparently have more allergies. You can't win really.

I wanted to avoid a July/August baby and a mid September - early October baby when the hospital are crazy busy because everyone got drunk at Christmas 😉

@goshy Lots of areas (most?) in America do the cut-off Jan-Dec, so those men were probably in the middle of their school year.

Agree with others that you can't always plan. I had a mid-August due date and ended up with a September baby!

If I lived in England yes I would

My birthdays 27th august, I might of struggled a-bit in my early years but I'm 27 now and I have a degree, a good job that pays well and I own my own house. Everything evens out eventually with your peers, I would say by the time I reached secondary school I had evened out with my peers. If you want another child why delay it? You can't control everything

Personally, wouldn't bother waiting. You just don't know what will happen. DS was due November, came end of August. I'm late summer born and so is my sister, both have degrees and never struggled academically as children.

@SycamoreTall is that same for South Africa?

DD was an August baby. 5 straight As in her Advanced Highers, maths degree from Durham uni, works as a senior risk analyst in the head office of a major bank.
So yeah, being summer born was a real handicap. Oh wait…!

Nope. Two summer borns here! One struggled with first year of school, and then the pandemic messed things up but is now flying going into year 3. The other is away to start school and is already ahead of the curve. Not a pressurised household either, they both just like learning. Every kid is different, I'd say though that I really notice no difference in maturity or ability now with my 7 year old compared with his class mates

DS is summer born. Tried for a sibling without success in mid thirties for two years. I wouldn’t delay. He’s not behind at all and was completely ready for school at 4. Plus if you work it’s cheaper with a summer born.

Good grief....is this actually a thing?

I would push on ttc regardless. So many unknowns and circumstances that could arise that are totally outwith your control.

And for what it's worth, dc1 is Oct born and dc2 is June born. I would say dc2 is a more accomplished and naturally academic out the two.

But we certainly didn't plan their due month. Dc1 took 3.5 years to conceive so we were juts bloody grateful we did. Dc2 took a year to conceive and again, we juts felt lucky.

Are you in scotland though (I ask as you refer to advanced highers)... the current offs are different in scotland so summer born isn't relevant, it's the Nov-Feb babies who are the youngest

Would have been happy with a summer baby with either one - didn't avoid particular months just ended up that both will be April babies.