Would you put off conceiving to avoid a summer born child?

[Algor1thm]

We're ready to try for our second, but have realised that Aug-Nov conceptions lead to summer born babies. Summer born children statistically have worse academic outcomes than those born earlier in the school year. You can now request a deferral, but I gather this can be quite a difficult process with no guarantees. Our first is late autumn/early winter born and I'm very glad they will be closer to 5 when they start school.

However my husband doesn't want to wait until Dec/Jan to start trying as we're already looking at a fairly large age gap, and he pointed out we don't know how long it'll take us to conceive/we could experience pregnancy loss which would set us back etc. We're in our early-mid 30s so not old, but we are several years older than the last time we ttc, so I don't want to assume it'll be straightforward.

Particularly interested to hear from summer borns... do you think we should wait a few more months for the benefit of having an autumn rather than summer born child?

I have a summer born and ideally it wasn’t what be and DH wanted but after 11 hard and upsetting months of TTC we were absolutely delighted to eventually get a positive test result…….even if it was in December:

My summer born son ‘should’ have started school last year, a week after his 4th birthday, but instead he is starting this year, a week after his 5th birthday.

Getting his school start deferred wasn’t problematic at all, and I’m pretty confident that in another 5 years or so it will be such a common practice that it won’t even be an issue at all.

I was born very late August. Tbh I did struggle a bit in primary school being the youngest in the year. That said, I'm now a lawyer so my August birthday didn't hold me back too much :).

Don't delay, as other PP have said, you can't plan for all eventualities. Babies come when they are ready/or too late soon and it could take you a while to get pregnant. Good luck!! X

My summer boy, and his summer boy peers, were less mature in the early stages of primary, but now they are all Uni age there seems very little or no difference that could be attributed to age.

I did. I know there will be loads on here who have summer born children who have been totally fine, but summer born child do statistically find school more challenging initially. Particularly so for boys. I’m also a teacher and an Autumn baby was best for maternity leave. Both of my children have a September birthday so I appreciate that I was very lucky and our plan worked out. They are 9 and 6 and both flying at school and at sports which is probably partly due to being one of the older ones in their class.

I did this and had ds2 born in early September. Oldest in the year. Struggles academically much more than his older brother who has a January birthday.

It also meant an extra year of nursery fees and I found it hard heading into the winter with a newborn- he got bronchiolitis at 3 months old. With ds 1, born in Jan we hibernated for a few weeks til spring then just as I was starting to go out and about in March time, spring was on its way- I preferred that!

Our DS was conceived for a September birth unintentionally. However he was 10 weeks early. So you can’t really control it sometimes. It’s very much dependent on the aptitude of the child. I know several autumn/winter babies who are struggling academically.

No. You can't tell in advance when your child will be ready for school, And summer born children have several advantages including:

From the end of maternity leave to starting school is 3 years rather than 4. Mine was August born. £12-15k childcare saving for someone working full time, at today's rates.

You can take them on holiday for the whole of reception year without being fined.

My ds used to stand outside primary school at three, watching my niece go in and say 'why can't I go too mummy'. He was more than ready at 4 and three weeks. He loved it.

My Summer born baby was ready to start school with the children about a couple of weeks older than her and has consistently performed near the top of her year academically, so I would go right ahead with a summer baby possibility.

No, because you are assuming it's always possible to conceive when you want to. Which is great if you can, but it's not always the case and it might just be any time of year out of your control.

That’s not true; most cutoffs in US are between August and October.

I “planned” my first to not be a summer born. Pregnant first month of trying. He was due end of Sept, although came mid Oct. I repeated this with my second but didn’t expect to get pregnant first time again so started a month early. Of course, pregnant first month trying again and now due on the 1st September 🤦‍♀️ Hoping she holds on until then!

@SycamoreTall

I have a child born in spring and a child born in late summer. There seems little difference Academically. The only difference was it was much easier being heavily pregnant in the spring compared to the late summer!!

You might not fall pregnant straight away. I did with my first 2, my 3rd took 5 months of trying, timing ovulation, etc

Im an August baby and we planned to do this for our DC. But then we had fertility issues and two years of TTC + pandemic meant that when we got to the top of the ACU list, we just went for it and ended up with DD born in June (although her due date was July). As pp has said, life doesn't always work out as planned!

@Pipthesqueak Interesting, I never came across that.

My end of June girl has been consistently top of her class since she started school

When I was expecting my first dc their due date was end of July. At my ante natal classes a few of the other women (due in mid- late august) were hoping their babies were late. I was confused until one explained they wanted them to be September babies and thus oldest in the school year, rather than youngest. I hadn't given it a thought. With DC2 I did plan but it was due to a number of factors rather than just school terms.

The last set of birth season based data analysis that I saw from FFT showed that, whilst summer born children attain lower to begin with, they also make more progress (as they have more to make) and that it largely balances out ahead of sitting their secondary qualifications.

I got pregnant with my first, first month of trying. With the second it took twelve months and two miscarriages. We soon stopped caring which month our child was born in.

August born, top sets at school, went to a RG uni. Brother born Sept - didn’t scrape a single C.

My daughter was premature and born Sept 4th. The childminder (without being asked) points out how intelligent she is, esp compared to others her age. She is desperate to start school.

How well they do depends on the child and their personality.

DC1 July baby, aced GCSEs and A Levels, absolutely zero common sense and about as sporty as a block of lard. DC2 November baby struggles a bit as has dyslexia but on the flip side is excellent at sport and communication and did well in GCSEs looking to do ok in A Levels. DC3 November baby, very academic and very sporty so swings and roundabouts really. The youngest 2 it's a bloody nightmare finding things to do for birthdays whereas first one had wonderful outdoorsy parties.

I wouldn't put of conceiving for something which definitely isn't a given.

I have a 31 August DS about to join year 2 who is really struggling- we requested a deferral but the school refused. However he was due end of September.
DD starts this September and is 30 July birthday so just turned 4. She would have been ready a year ago! There is literally no way to call it. I think had my DS waited to be born in September or had the delayed start, he would still be behind it would have made no difference at all.
However we are going to aim TTC no3 to avoid a Christmas birthday!

My middle child was born in August, he’s a scientist, I was born in August and have a good career even though I was a stay at home Mum for about 10 years.
My two other children had birthdays in spring and it was red hot weather with both of them so it was a bit of a struggle for the last couple of weeks in pregnancy.
I think being a stay at home Mum had more of a beneficial effect on my children rather than when they were born even though we made lots of sacrifices to do it.

I wouldn't. I know so many people who've struggled to conceive after delaying a little, and they all struggle with the 'what-ifs'.

I was the youngest child in my year throughout school and had an academic scholarship and a music scholarship. I didn't love being the youngest, but it didn't hold me back.