Would you go on holiday without your baby?

[Decisionstomakenow]

I have the opportunity to go away child free for a week away in the sun. Partner will look after our 8 month old. However, I’m struggling to jump at the chance of going away, as much as I want to. A week is a long time for mother and baby to be apart in my opinion. I do 80% of the caring for her so it’s safe to say we’re quite attached to one another.

Tell me your experiences both good and bad, any regrets etc? Thanks

I wouldn't. Too young. If you're her carer most of the time, she views you as her protector and will wonder where you've gone

No.
a night away for a wedding aged 9 months was all I could manage tbh I was so in love with DS. I missed him so much-even though he never slept!

@gemmalondonahh I was thinking the same, it’s a very sudden disappearance isn’t it, not even like it’s a night or so, it’s a full week away.

I wouldn't, I don't have an opinion on what anyone else does though. It's just not how I rolled.

I wouldn't and I would judge someone who did tbh

Yes it sounds amazing and we could all of done with it I just wouldn't of been able to I'm afraid.

Far too young. I wouldn’t.

But I've never left my nearly 4 year old overnight yet so i'm probably not the best person to ask

@MyVoiceCounts In total she has only spent 2 nights away from me on separate occasions. She was with her gran so I could get some sleep. I dropped her in evening and picked her next morning so not even 24 hours.

I would. I completely trust that my partner could handle it and by that point I was ready.

@berksandbeyond Wow, 4 years and not a single night away?

I'd maybe manage a night (and feel terribly guilty the whole time), but definitely not a week.

no, I wouldn’t leave my 8mo for a week for anything that wasn’t an absolute necessity.

It's not about just about handling it though, is it? You could hand the baby to just about any passing human and they could handle it.

No. BFing was still in full swing at that point so it wouldn’t have been possible. But even if it was, I wouldn’t have wanted to.

But different strokes for different folks.

But Op is this baby's carer most of the time. It isn't about trusting her partner

It's about separating herself from a still young baby and that baby wondering where she's gone

It isn't a night away!

@trevthecat Partner is quite good with her but I’m always there, what he would be like on his own for a week both day and night I couldn’t say as it’s never been left to him for that length of time. It’s worth mentioning she wakes up at least twice during the night still.

Left my 4yr old to give birth to my youngest but I’ve never had a night away- no one to leave them with. It’s not that strange, plenty of us with no grandparents around.

I did for a couple of days not a week at that age, but neither of those were leaving baby with daddy (with GPs). Totally up to you.

@OnlyFoolsnMothers I was impressed by her not having a single night apart from her 4yo. It’s quite admirable if childcare is an option but not taken. I understand about those with no grandparents. I only have my mum and she’s elderly so I don’t have anyone either other than partner.

I see no problem provided the partner is an equal sensible parent and not a man child. Its the other parent, not a stranger.

A week is quite a long time and while there's no actual problem with it, there's no need to do it just because you can, especially if it'll upset you. I did a long weekend away when DD was about 11 months old and that was difficult emotionally. She had a great time and obviously didn't notice I was gone but I was quite anxious and upset most of the time and felt like I was missing a limb!

Would you be able/willing to do a trial of one night away? Stay in a hotel nearby-ish while your partner looks after the baby and see how you go?

I wouldn't but I'm not the best person to ask as I've only left DS1 overnight once and that was after I'd had DS2 and he was with DH. DH is entirely capable but I still wouldn't go away that long unless it was a dire emergency. A night maybe and not at 8 months. No judgement at all but that's just me. Others are a lot more comfortable sooner and that's ok too.

Long weekend maybe. Mine are 9&11 and five days is usually my limit (10 days once but that was an unexpected situation. Hated it)

Husband jets off fine around the world on business though...