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Feeling annoyed about school and need to rant!

363 replies

november90 · 06/10/2021 18:54

I'm sure most will read this and think I'm being unreasonable... maybe I am but I just need to vent!
My son is 4 and just started reception. Like most his age, suffered a lot due to the lockdowns etc and is having some difficulty adjusting to school. He is finding his uniform very difficult to wear as he doesn't feel comfy. It's mainly the pants. I put his issues with certain textures on his nursery transition form, i mentioned it on the pre school meeting, the home visit and also the phonics meeting 2 weeks ago. I just want assurance he's ok to wear his shorts which they have always told me he is. Anyway, dropped him off today and the teacher was really abrupt with me about wearing his pe shorts and not joggers... they way them to go into school wearing both at the same time. I felt so embarrassed and also annoyed.... why tell me one minute he's ok tk wear shorts but the next she wants the joggers and shorts?!
Also, the reading book annoys me. I made ds feel so proud about himself last week for doing a reading session everyday and he watched me fill the book out and when it got send home after being reviewed not so much a sticker or well done comment! Completely blank!
I've spoke to my family about this who say I'm expecting too much from school... but I just feel sad that we're like 6 weeks into school and o feel so distant from it all!
Anyone else have a new school child and feel the same? I know teachers are stressed and restricted due to Covid, but as a parent I'm finding it hard!

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Hulkynothunky · 06/10/2021 23:11

@BoredZelda

So many people on here have said to @BoredZelda ‘don’t fill it out then’ when Zebra has said they read to their kid. So I think we can agree the diary has flaws.

And despite all their excellent reading and diary filling skills, they were unable to read my comment that I never did fill it out. 😆

You also said this:

"You forget your kid needs to do some reading? Stick a post it on the fridge if you really need a reminder. The rest of us are having to fill these things out needlessly because you forget."

Which would imply you do fill it out.

toocold54 · 06/10/2021 23:12

If they don’t remember where they read to then what difference does it make where they start?

Have you ever been around children at all?

See if you can do some reading to a bunch of primary kids and ask them to find you the page they last read.
They will take ages to find it, they’ll talk about something irrelevant, they’ll find the correct page and start reading and then half way through say they’ve read that page and spend ages looking for the proper page. They’ll find the new page, start reading and then decide actually it was the other page.
Grin

Benjispruce4 · 06/10/2021 23:13

The idea is to read a book from stat to finish, understand what’s been read and answer questions about it.Reading the same parts gives a false impression of ability as some learn the words and repeat from memory. Also it takes precious time faffing about while they say ‘oh I think I read that bit, wait no i didn’t I think I went past that page …..’

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Benjispruce4 · 06/10/2021 23:14

You do surprise me @Pumperthepumper!

toocold54 · 06/10/2021 23:14

Which would imply you do fill it out.

They’ve also said they think the diaries are pointless but made an excellent point about why they are so beneficial.
To be honest I think they’re a bit confused.

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 23:16

@Benjispruce4

You do surprise me *@Pumperthepumper*!
Why?
BoredZelda · 06/10/2021 23:17

Actually you complained about filling out the log as people can't remember to do the reading and should use a post it note instead.

Actually I said “the rest of us” as in, everyone else feeling they have to do it.

So what you are now saying is it literally doesn't impact on you whether these logs are used or not.

Where it impacts is that schools keep using them, despite them being utterly useless, under the mistaken belief the school is achieving something, when all they are doing is putting undue pressure on parents who are unable to do it. It also feeds their belief that doing things like apportioning house points or giving certificates is appropriate for thinks some kids have absolutely no control over.

How would you know what families don’t read to their kids unless you have a reading diary?

I never filled it in. That blank page meant nothing to the teacher because she knew my child could read. It’s also important to remember, you can also read every night with your child and they can still have problems with reading. What’s important is that the teacher knows who can read and I would have thought teachers know this by using that revolutionary method of actually asking a child to read.

You can't seem grasp that some people find a regular reminder helpful. That is certainly odd in my experience

I need a regular reminder to buy milk, to pay a bill, to put the bins out. As a parent of a primary aged child, a reminder to help educate them seems unnecessary. Has the bedtime story really fallen so by the wayside that those who are able to do it simply forget? And frankly, you can’t move these days without someone reminding you about the apparent importance of reading with your children.

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 23:17

@toocold54

If they don’t remember where they read to then what difference does it make where they start?

Have you ever been around children at all?

See if you can do some reading to a bunch of primary kids and ask them to find you the page they last read.
They will take ages to find it, they’ll talk about something irrelevant, they’ll find the correct page and start reading and then half way through say they’ve read that page and spend ages looking for the proper page. They’ll find the new page, start reading and then decide actually it was the other page.
Grin

I wouldn’t ask them to find the page they last read. I’d ask them to chose any page and tell me about it.

What stage do you teach @toocold54

BoredZelda · 06/10/2021 23:18

They’ve also said they think the diaries are pointless but made an excellent point about why they are so beneficial.

Except we didn’t. That was your comprehension struggling.

toocold54 · 06/10/2021 23:19

Except we didn’t. That was your comprehension struggling.

Whose we?

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 23:20

@Benjispruce4

The idea is to read a book from stat to finish, understand what’s been read and answer questions about it.Reading the same parts gives a false impression of ability as some learn the words and repeat from memory. Also it takes precious time faffing about while they say ‘oh I think I read that bit, wait no i didn’t I think I went past that page …..’
What’s the point of reading it start to finish if they can’t remember anything about it?

‘Repeating from memory’ is really, really important in early years - learning the shape of the words and recognising them is really important. What stage do you teach?

OppsUpsSide · 06/10/2021 23:20

The shorts/joggers thing is a pointless issue for them to pick you up on, you need to stand your ground really and be politely firm.
The lack of acknowledgment of the reading record might seem silly to some but if you ask a child (and parent!) to get on board with something it is good practice to recognise their achievement.

toocold54 · 06/10/2021 23:21

@Pumperthepumper I currently teach KS1-KS4 as I now work in a specialist SEND unit so obviously there is a large range of stages.

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 23:22

[quote toocold54]@Pumperthepumper I currently teach KS1-KS4 as I now work in a specialist SEND unit so obviously there is a large range of stages.[/quote]
And how do you teach reading?

BoredZelda · 06/10/2021 23:25

See if you can do some reading to a bunch of primary kids and ask them to find you the page they last read.

Good skill for them to practice.

They will take ages to find it, they’ll talk about something irrelevant, they’ll find the correct page and start reading and then half way through say they’ve read that page and spend ages looking for the proper page. They’ll find the new page, start reading and then decide actually it was the other page.

If they talk about something irrelevant, focus them on the book again. And all that flipping through, looking at words, recalling stories, reading words is great practice at reading. It also sounds like fun. Which is what it is supposed to be about.

The idea is to read a book from stat to finish, understand what’s been read and answer questions about it.Reading the same parts gives a false impression of ability as some learn the words and repeat from memory.

It’s biff chip and kipper. Not War and Peace. The plot line is thin at best. They read a page, they answer a question about it. The best way to avoid a child reading from memory is to skip about the book rather than reading it through. If they can’t find the page they read, they won’t have memorised it. Such an old fashioned approach to teaching reading.

toocold54 · 06/10/2021 23:25

And how do you teach reading?

The same as they would learn in primary schools by using things like phonics as some of them would have started in mainstream primary schools before coming to us so we try and follow on from what they’ve already been taught.

Some are visually impaired, deaf or mute so depending on the needs we obviously use different strategies.

How do you teach reading?

BoredZelda · 06/10/2021 23:26

Whose we?

Forgotten already?

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 23:28

@toocold54

And how do you teach reading?

The same as they would learn in primary schools by using things like phonics as some of them would have started in mainstream primary schools before coming to us so we try and follow on from what they’ve already been taught.

Some are visually impaired, deaf or mute so depending on the needs we obviously use different strategies.

How do you teach reading?

Phonics, word recognition, sight words, practice, active learning, the usual.

So I’m surprised you rely so heavily on needing to start at a particular page, particularly in an SEND unit. How do you assess their comprehension?

yikersvipers · 06/10/2021 23:29

[quote alrightfella]@november90 I'm going to disagree slightly with everyone else. My dc went to a private school. In reception they were heard to read every day and a comment would be written in the book, and ticks, stars and stickers given frequently [/quote]
Not helpful at all! Obviously we're not talking about a private school.

toocold54 · 06/10/2021 23:30

If they talk about something irrelevant, focus them on the book again. And all that flipping through, looking at words, recalling stories, reading words is great practice at reading. It also sounds like fun. Which is what it is supposed to be about.

What a lovely school you must work in to have so much time dedicated to each child x 30 in an average class, to spend time flipping through the pages of the book they’ve already read numerous times even though you have a national curriculum to teach.
This is why reading is encouraged at home as it’s the time to do all those things.

If they were allowed to pick a page at random how long would they have that book for?
What if every single time they started on the first page?
When would be the time you move on to the next book? They need to go on to more challenging books eventually.

toomuchlaundry · 06/10/2021 23:30

When do you encourage a child to finish a book or is it ok to go through life just reading a few pages here and there? How do they get it is a story?

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 23:30

@toocold54

If they talk about something irrelevant, focus them on the book again. And all that flipping through, looking at words, recalling stories, reading words is great practice at reading. It also sounds like fun. Which is what it is supposed to be about.

What a lovely school you must work in to have so much time dedicated to each child x 30 in an average class, to spend time flipping through the pages of the book they’ve already read numerous times even though you have a national curriculum to teach.
This is why reading is encouraged at home as it’s the time to do all those things.

If they were allowed to pick a page at random how long would they have that book for?
What if every single time they started on the first page?
When would be the time you move on to the next book? They need to go on to more challenging books eventually.

Do you use reading schemes?
toocold54 · 06/10/2021 23:31

Forgotten already?

Yes I must have. Can you explain please?

Hulkynothunky · 06/10/2021 23:31

Actually I said “the rest of us” as in, everyone else feeling they have to do it.

Yes that is what you said. The inference posters have drawn from your statement was that includes you actually doing the log. It was not an unreasonable conclusion to reach based on what you said.

Where it impacts is that schools keep using them, despite them being utterly useless, under the mistaken belief the school is achieving something*

This is your opinion. It is not fact. I and other posters happen to disagree.

when all they are doing is putting undue pressure on parents who are unable to do it.

You are full of contradictions. You sound sympathetic here that not all parents can get the reading done....yet later you say this:

need a regular reminder to buy milk, to pay a bill, to put the bins out. As a parent of a primary aged child, a reminder to help educate them seems unnecessary. Has the bedtime story really fallen so by the wayside that those who are able to do it simply forget? And frankly, you can’t move these days without someone reminding you about the apparent importance of reading with your children.

So now parents not doing bedtime reading or needing reminders should feel some pressure then? As you judge them here for needing "reminding about the importance of reading".

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 23:32

@toomuchlaundry

When do you encourage a child to finish a book or is it ok to go through life just reading a few pages here and there? How do they get it is a story?
I encourage them to finish it if they’re engaged in it, if they’re keen to read on, if they can work out themselves where they are in the text. I would never open a book for them and make them read from where I know they left off, even if they don’t. That’s not coherence or comprehension.