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Original poster

Going on holiday without 10mo

80 replies

Dontjumptoconclusions · 31/08/2021 07:32

Looking for a bit of advice here.

I'm bridesmaid at a 4 day destination wedding in November. My DS will be 10 mo then and will be the first time DH and I are away from him for more than one night. I have asked my parents to look after DS as I'd like to be completely available to help the bride during the event.

As the event is getting closer, me and DH are thinking of extending our stay there. With the combination of covid and a newborn, we would like a holiday just ourselves without the baby or a wedding to deal with. Thinking about making it a 10 day holiday instead of 4 days.

GPS are happy to look after DS during this time but I just wanted to ask other people's experience leaving their child for an extended amount of time. I don't want him feeling upset and missing us loads. He doesn't suffer from separation anxiety (which could change in a few months) and he's bottle fed.

Thank you!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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Idontgiveagriffindamn · 31/08/2021 07:35

We went to a wedding in Vegas without my 14 month old. Went for 6 days and that was just a day or 2 too long for us in reality.
That was before Covid times and I’m not sure I could do it now with the risk of not being able to come home / having to quarantine.

GreenTortoise · 31/08/2021 07:37

I personally couldn't be away from a young baby at that age for that long. But everyone differs so what you're comfortable with others won't.

AppleKatie · 31/08/2021 07:38

This is such a personal decision. For me I wouldn’t have unless DH was staying at home with baby and then I would- for 4 nights not 10 though.

Some women wouldn’t even go for a night.

Some would be fine.

There isn’t a right or wrong but it’s up to you.

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TheTeenageYears · 31/08/2021 07:41

I think in normal times you would be fine but at the moment any travel which involves crossing a border can be fraught with problems. Rules change at the drop of a hat, you could get covid and be stuck. There is a much higher likelihood of something going wrong currently which would see you separated from DS for much longer than intended. On that basis i'm not even sure I would do the 4 days.

alrightfella · 31/08/2021 07:42

Honestly I think 4 nights is a long time to be away from a baby that young.

MattyGroves · 31/08/2021 07:47

I don't know that 4 days Vs 10 would make much difference to the baby, they will notice you're gone either way if you see what I mean.

I personally couldn't have gone away for even four nights when mine was that young but that bit is up to you. I also think it's a really big thing to ask of the grandparents. I would personally go for more weekends away rather than a big block of time

AllHallowsEve14 · 31/08/2021 07:48

I went on holiday for a week when my DTs were 6 months old. They were with their dad though so that might have made a difference. I couldn't have stayed away longer than that. Like someone above said, there is no right or wrong answer.

kaleidoscopeheartless · 31/08/2021 07:50

Go for it. It's a one off. You trust your parents to look after your little one.

JamieLeeBee · 31/08/2021 07:53

Don't know how you can consider it tbh personally. Mine is 2 and I've only ever been away from her overnight twice. And I put her to bed and picked her up soon after waking the next day

Phiphi123 · 31/08/2021 08:00

Go and enjoy it! Mumsnet the wrong place to ask this question if you think you’ll enjoy yourself absolutely no harm will come to your baby spending 10 days with grandparents! I’d go if I had an offer like that

LynetteScavo · 31/08/2021 08:07

If you're al comfortable with it, then fine.

Personally I could even leave a 10mo go 4 days, but that's me.

My DM left my DSis for two weeks at that age. DSis learned to walk with my grandparents and everyone had a jolly time, from what I'm told. I'the baby knows the grandparents well it's not like leaving them with someone they've never met.

BiddyPop · 31/08/2021 08:11

My DPs went away for a week when we were young. A DAunt minded 5 older ones, but the 11 month old went to a neighbour with only 2 DCs. When DPs got home, the youngest was calling DNeighbours DM and DF - as that's what their own 2 were calling them. So just be prepared for that. (It still comes up occasionally in family lore, and youngest is now married with DCs themselves).

MattyGroves · 31/08/2021 08:12

It really does depend on how well the grandparents know the baby. Some grandparents are more involved than the dad tbh

Morechocmorechoc · 31/08/2021 08:12

If you do 10 days and test positive for covid you coukd end up being away 20. Poor little one!

dalmatianmad · 31/08/2021 08:14

It's such an individual personal choice. I struggled to leave mine. I've just had a night away with a friend for a hen do and her baby was 6 days old.

ItsSunnyOutside · 31/08/2021 08:37

I think 10 days is a long time to leave a 10 month old baby without mum or dad. I would not do it.

You know your own child though.

rookiemere · 31/08/2021 08:41

Is this abroad?
We've just cancelled a weekend to Jersey because of the (minuscule if we test in advance) risk of testing positive there and having to find somewhere for DS15 to stay for the fortnight, so I wouldn't be doing it with a baby.
NB normally I'd say 4 nights away is no problem at that age, provided they have someone they know and love to stay with.

turnthebiglightoff · 31/08/2021 08:42

I think 10 days is a long time. I did 2 nights away recently and was majorly jonesing for my kid. Different strokes, though.

rookiemere · 31/08/2021 08:42

Oh sorry I see you say 10 nights is the plan - feels too long to me.

SpicyJalfrezi · 31/08/2021 08:45

I wouldn’t.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 31/08/2021 08:51

Honestly? I think you will get half way through and want to come home.

DH worked away a lot when ours were little (still does). He missed them a lot. By some miracle he managed to see both walk for the first time. But that was the only 'first' he saw.

rubyslippers · 31/08/2021 08:53

I think the Covid risk and any potential quarantine could turn a 10 day holiday into a lot more

PotteringAlong · 31/08/2021 08:53

I wouldn’t leave mine for 10 days and they’re 9, 7 and 5! 10 days is a long time for all of you. And, test positive for Covid and that becomes 20 days. I wouldn’t take the risk.

QueenHofScotland · 31/08/2021 09:03

No I wouldn’t leave a baby for that long.

I wouldn’t leave my older kids (7, 11) for that long either.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 31/08/2021 09:06

At 10mo they dont really have a perception of time, so to them, theres no difference between 4 days and 10. It really just comes down to how long you and dh would want to be apart from them.

Nothing wrong with either length holiday - however there is the possibility that the how you feel now and how you feel during the extended trip would he different.

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