Do you let your toddler play with your phone?

[peaches35]

Just that really. My 15 month old DS loves my iPhone and already uses his finger to swipe the screen. I find it really sad/depressing and try not to give it to him very often, but admit that I do let him play with it occasionally when I’m desperate for some peace and a break.

Now he knows what it does though he gets really bad tempered when I sit on the sofa reading my phone whilst he’s playing. He will stop what he’s doing and demand the phone, so I now have to hide it when he’s around!

I feel like a crap mum for letting him get hold of it in the first place. Is anyone else’s toddler like this?

My kids gets the phone if they are too upset in the car.

I got the Dave and Ava app. It's paid but worth every penny. I find it even works well muted

I am not a fan of screen time for kids but I have got it out in moments of desperation to keep them occupied or distract them when nothing else will work. I think it's ok in an emergency but serves no use beyond that.

Hi OP, don't feel like a crap mum! Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do for a breather!

My DD is 15mo and she has my phone whenever we change her nappy as it's the only way to get her to stay still long enough. I tend to let her watch one video during nappy change and then once the video is finished, I say "all done" and take the phone away. She doesn't seem interested in it any other time (although she did when she was younger and I too had to hide it), I'm not sure if this is because she doesn't usually have it in the living room or whether it's just her personality?

Could you perhaps invest in a cheap kids tablet instead so that he doesn't make the association with your phone? Although I guess it depends how much it bothers you having to hide it!

My DD is 15 months too and I could've written your post OP. We resorted to getting her a cheap Samsung tablet off FB Market Place with a big child proof case on it. She gets it for an hour or so a day when she's getting a bit shitty. Best thing we've bought she loves watching Youtube on it. (Kid friendly of course) x

Second one hasn't shown a massive interest. He grabs it does a little swipe and I take it back of him. Second one is 3.5 and he does have a bit of time on the tablet. This is part of a variety of things though. I do think there's things to learn. I've caught him watching videos about space and volcanoes 🤷‍♀️ Equally I've seen him watching shit too, he seems to find lots of videos on YouTube kids of people playing with toys and making cakes and chocolate bars 🤦‍♀️

Meant first one, our second one is 16 months

@Opalfeet has a point. I don't really like YouTube for my kids. I prefer Dave and Ava or educational apps so I know what they're watching

Also it allows me to put the phone in airplane mode

My 3 year old has an episode of a cartoon on my phone in the morning sometimes while I try to have an extra doze before the baby wakes.

I used to let them use it whilst we waited at the doctors or similar at that age (with the sound off). It would always keep them still and silent as it was a novelty.
Once they were a bit older, we got a kid's tablet and loaded it with the Cbeebies apps etc and supplied them with headphones. They are 5 & 7yo now and the tablets (and ancient Nintendos) are still reserved for short times when I need them sat quietly and occupied eg when their sibling has their swimming lesson. It doesn't seem to have done them any damage and is a great tool in the arsenal.

DD2 used to go through the Numberblocks app while her sister had online classes

I think it's ok but it depends on context, content and time spent on it. I love showing things to my kids on the phone. As a kid I would always check my parents' encyclopaedias but we don't have those anymore

None of my dc have ever been allowed to play with my phone. It's mine!

Neither of mine (3 and 6) have ever been allowed on mine or DH's phones. They both have tablets but they are up on a high shelf and haven't been used in months as youngest kept getting frustrated and having tantrums while using it and it was just too much stress. They watch a fuck ton of telly though, so I'm no perfect "30 mins of screen time a day" parent by any stretch

The downside to this is that they are both completely useless at using any kind of tech which made home schooling the eldest quite difficult during the lockdowns.

Toddlers Imitate
They want to copy what you do
So read a book instead

Or get a kids amazon fire or something as "his" phone

Nope, never.

I try not to, he gets it maybe once or twice a week for a nappy change if its very messy and he's very wriggly.

I find it sad too seeing small children glued to screens especially when they are practically still babies. I think a short time every so often when they play with lots of different things is fine and part of modern life.

I try not to judge but I am gobsmacked at the PP who gives their 1 year old an hour of screen time a day! Thats more what I'd expect for a 6-10 year old and still not everyday! That's shocking tbh...

Never the phone, television yes.

@JustWonderingIfYou why are you shocked? That's one hour out of a day. You have no idea what they are doing got the rest of the day. And for the read a book instead...people can do both. 🤷‍♀️

@JustWonderingIfYou Guessing that was aimed at me? You know nothing about my life so keep your opinions to yourself.

No, mine has rang the police before (completely unaware toddler), which was embarrassing to say the least.

@JustWonderingIfYou And wow, if you think most 6-10 year olds only have around an hour of screen time a day, then you're very wrong. We do what we gotta do and if my child is happy sitting in front of Hey Duggee for an hour, then so be it? I'm hardly worst parent of the year!

A little bit of screen time isn’t going to do any harm, don’t beat yourself up about things like this.

You will probably find that he loses interest if you limit the amount that you look at your phone in front of him.

No.
(I mean, I don't have toddlers any more, but, when I did)

More for the protection of the phone that particular concerns about not being a perfect Mum - I mean, who is ?
Generally, I don't think it is a good plan to give babies / toddlers / small children generally expensive things to play with.

Yeah I definitely let him. I did a bit of digging into the screen time research and it’s frankly pretty crap with no robust conclusions (or even decent data that I could find). Anecdotally, my son learns loads from the phone m, both videos and games. He comes out with vocabulary that really surprises me and that I know he’s learnt from certain videos.

He’s 4 now and he loves a game called Lingokids that has been fab for his counting. He also loves to watch videos of people playing with Transformers toys, especially really complex ones, and now he’s amazing at doing them himself! Much better than me anyway.

Together we watch videos about cute animals, Venus fly traps and deep sea fish I really enjoy sitting with him on Saturday mornings, eating breakfast and watching people build tide pool aquariums.

The way I see it, he’s got access to more information than almost every human in history. Why would I try to keep that from him?