how old were you when you had children?

[wowmarylou]

I'm turning 31 this year, newly single and childless. My ex and I were engaged and planning on trying for a baby this year but we called things off after admitting we were no longer in love. I would love to be a mum but I'm worried as time is ticking and all but 1 of my gfs have at least one LO. What's your story?

20 and hoping to have another in the near future (now 29)

First at 32, now 13 weeks pregnant at 35 (will be 36 when I have the baby)

Met at 32, married 35, baby at 37 (conceived first month off the pill). I know hardly anyone who had children before 30 but obviously meeting someone is key! I do know at least two people who met their partners in their very late 30s and still went on to have children. I wouldn't worry yet! Not so great for the lovely single friends I have who were turning 40 as the pandemic hit but you have plenty of time.

31, 34, 37, 39, 41

Hi, I don't mean to be a killjoy but I do feel I need to reply when there's lots of people saying there's plenty of time. I'm sure there probably is for the poster - but it doesn't happen for everyone. I got married at 35 and started trying straight away. It didn't happen for us and lead to two failed ivf attempts which I just couldn't repeat again as it was not a pleasant experience. So yes, obviously don't rush into it, but please also be aware that it doesn't automatically happen either.

Met my husband at 34 (nearly 35), married at 39, now pregnant at 41.

Also, my first major living-together-type relationship ended when I was around your age, OP. I remember having similar thoughts, but I gave myself plenty of time to recover and now I look back and I wouldn't change a thing.

33,nearly 34

36, 38 and 41. Got pregnant first month of trying each time. Three healthy children. A friend has 3 healthy DC all born in her 40s, she's got Indian heritage though, there's some evidence women from the subcontinent have later menopause than white women. Not sure about other ethnic groups, there's probably no research been done.

For all the fuss in the press there is not a cliff face drop in fertility at 35. It takes a bit longer to get pregnant at 39 than at 29 but it's really only in your 40s that fertility drops significantly. There's minimal research done on normal healthy fertility though, the data all comes from those with fertility issues so a group that is by definition not representative.

24, 27 and 36.

27 and then 28.

I had my first one a few months after I turned 30. Second one I was about to turn 37.

21 and 31

Met at 20
Got together at 25
Married at 30
Started trying at 32
First child at 34
Second at 38
Both needed clomid.

I had a lot of emotional/health problems in my late teens and 20s. It seemed to change the course of things. However, I became a teacher and put everything into my work for many of those years. I really wanted to meet someone but thought I wasn't good enough, that nobody would want me. I convinced myself of this. I never had a boyfriend, never been on a date, not even kissed someone!! Then something happened...I turned 30 and had my wisdom teeth taken out lol! Not on the same day btw Sounds strange but it gave me a boost as I felt like I had overcome a fear as I'd put off having those teeth out for years. Not long after, I finally got up the courage and joined OK cupid and Match. I started dating 😁 6 months later, I met 'the one'. We established pretty quick that we both wanted the same things. Started trying for a baby 2 months into the relationship, I was pregnant 2 months after that. Moved in together and got engaged 2 months after that. We had our dc a year after we got together. I was 31. Got married the following year.

It was definitely a whirlwind romance and it has felt like everything has been back to front for us. Admittedly, we went straight in for having a baby when we didn't really know each, not really, and there have been some tough times since. I think it shocked a lot of our family and friends but it was our own story and that's what matters. No regrets. It just goes to show, that you never know who you might meet and what possibilities it will lead to.

I really hope you find what you're looking for. And maybe try Match when you're ready x

34

18
22
25
27

Met my husband at 20. Got married at 27. Had my son exactly one week shy of my 29th birthday.

29 & 35.

Most of my friends started having children in their late 30s, some early 40s. One friend just had her second child at 47 (her 17yo son is less than impressed, it's so gross etc )

I read an article recently that pointed out the accepted fertility data used today actually dates back about 200 years!

So all those infertile after 35 women had a very different lifestyle, nutrition, health care etc. We've moved on a lot since then, but that data hasn't been updated.

31, 33, 35 for me

Met my partner at 27. He proposed on my 32rd birthday, I was pregnant 6 weeks later and had my DD when I was 32, close to 33.

27 and 34

Hi I was married at 29 and trying for a baby then divorced at 32. Met my now partner at 35 and have just had our first baby, I'm now 38. Life doesn't always go according to plan and I did stress a lot about possibly getting too old before meeting someone and not having children. At 31 you've got plenty of time. I go to baby classes with the little one and theres quite a few 'older' mothers there (I class myself in this group). My little one is 15 weeks old and doing really well, try not to let age bother you too much 🙂

Currently pregnant with first at 33. Will be 34 when they arrive if they’re on time, earlier and may still be 33 lol.

20 and 22 - it was quite normal in the 80s